#haizehat

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OMG I LOVE ALL YOUR CHASEFIELD ART (vic is also my big gay crush ;w; ).

SHE’S ALSO MY BIG GAY CRUSH! you know, I have those fantasies of super mean girls who’s mean to me is secretly try to hitting on me. yes. I’m such a trash...

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Hiya, Im in the hospital for a burst appendix surgery, and I just wanted to say how awesome your art is and I'm enjoying going through your maximum victory comics so much!

Hey hello! I know it’s super late, I hope your surgery went fine. Also thank you! I’m happy when people really enjoying my art!

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Apologies

I’m sorry I’ve been away for really long. I’m currently under some medication that force to learn how to use my hand. I basically got mini strokes attack so I have to go back and have some rest and take my meds and stuff.

I’m gonna reply some messages because this getting so many! damn I’m the worst, I’m really sorry it take this long time. I think I’m gonna mostly inactive for about year come, at least until I graduate my college. I’m still gonna post things and stuff but I’m not sure if gonna be available here every day. Feels good to be back tho

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I finally manage to do some art! this is @ormille Caprixa and her Girlfriend, Merril!! Sorry for being such a bad friend. I doing my best to recover lol. Hope you like it!

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So My Boyfriend basically cheated on me and hook up with some girl and I was like “bitch! you should’ve said you like someone else, you piece of coward meat!!” 5 years of trust has been broken. pffttttt

Anyway I’m back. I’m gonna date girls from now on. bye, asshole

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So @holyfuckabear tagged me to tell 15 things about myself. Sorry this kinda super late like omg..Idk if this is interesting or not because I’m kinda a boring person but.. let’s start !!

1. I’m the first and the only child in my family.

2. I have an abusive father and my childhood is kinda sucks. Slashed by belt, slapped, Insults you name it. Sometimes I wonder if those experiences are actually the things influenced my..art theme and mood in general? maybe?

3. My interests are varied and I tend to try many different things and ended up kinda so-so about it (??)

4. I can play 4 instrument. Guitar, Ukulele, Drum, and Bass Guitar. I used to be in a Band while on high school as a Bassist and 2nd vocal. I still can play even today. My fingers are quite agile ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

5. I have a tendency to get very morbid and unstable emotion. I have this weird attraction to sad and dark themes. Yes, I’m that weirdo.. no secret left!

6. I’m having a hard time keeping up with people. for some reason I have a lot of trouble maintaining friendship and relationship. I’m doing well with get to know people but kinda horrible to maintain it.

7. I have a hard time being friends with girls. Like seriously I get more nervous when I have to friendly with girls, Also I can’t keep up with their conversation.. (I’m miserable AF)

8. I’m bad at arguing or debating when it got stupid because my brain just play a movie how I would kill those people in one hundred way possible thus make silence and goes blank in my own head.

9. I started to know “YURI” genre when I accidentally watched an anime called strawberry panic when I was 12. it’s escalated so quickly I can;t even defend myself from the gayness

10. I just diagnosed with focal neurological deficit 4 months ago which is make me cannot feel half part of my body very well (My left hand is numb for eternity). I can still move and do activities but I cannot feel pain very well. And this sometimes get worse if I got pretty tired or stressed out , which is make random part of my body feel numb.

11. My train of thoughts are too fast that sometimes I just forget things and goes blank in a split second, like forgetting things somewhere I put about millisecond ago and ended searching it for like a fucking hour..Damn you brain.

12. My neighbor @zheedhee​ Is my personal assistant and somehow fill my “mom’s role” here in our boarding house ~

13. I have a Portuguese and Chinese blood

14. Even tho I’m from a muslim family, my parent (especially my mom) is kinda open about anything. I live in a quite a liberal environment which is I’m grateful of even today

15. I put a lot of thought and consideration writing this because for some reason open yourself to people is kinda killing me. like peeling myself off. it’s really a relieve but dreadful at the same time tbh.

Hmm I don’t know who else or who already did it but if you want to do it, please feel free to do it! @ormille @chloepricewithgun @thegadgetfish @kunaike @mortiphasm @mostlymilkwood @carrececile

Also for anyone who saw this post, feel free to do it too!

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ANIMA Exhibition - JOURNAL “Sort of”

It’s been like a month maybe after the last time I update  my tumblr so I guess let’s have a major update on what’s going on my life, shall we?

-WARNING LONG POST-

For a past couple weeks, I’ve been working with Omnispace, An alternative artspace in Bandung with my college, @kecambahtigatiga​​ ,as one of our class assignments. And the thing was a Solo exhibition of my lecturer, who also an artist, Jabbar Muhammad {(1), (2) } , Called “ ANIMA”

It is an amazing experience tbh. Just being there, and talking to much a more established artist and involved in the process of  their career and stuff. I feel like I started to create my own understanding of how and what is an artist, “fine artist” ‘s world would look like and how they’re works from my own standpoint. But nevertheless it’s really fun, especially when you visit the work studio.

Basically there are 2 exhibitions on different place, one if for the paintings and the other are watercolor drawings, which is the one that being exhibit in my workplace. We also picked up the artwork, displayed it and such so, super exhausting....really...

Yesterday was the last day for us to work there. but it doesn’t mean it’s just end there.. so much to learn and so much to think about. Hell, I even thinking about pursuing a fine artist career.. but I don't know yet. Maybe? lol

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I’M NOT DEAD

I big update (probably) is coming up next before I get back to my grave...