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@hells-greatestdad

[📺] He had to stay calm. His plan was working, everything was starting to line up. He just needed a few more pieces to fall into place. The next one being Lucifer himself. The man was so easy to trick. His precious little girl was all he cared about. He would do anything for her.

But the poor man never paid enough attention, did he?

He didn't even hesitate or question when he called him posed as Charlie, and now he was luring him to the very thing he needed him to power. He was going to see to it that Lucifer suffered every inch of this. The would-be King was no ruler. He sold sinners to Heaven for the safety of those born down here. He didn't deserve to be called King.

This was going to be perfect.

As 'Charlie', he texted for Lucifer to meet him at the warehouse that his precious new toy was being kept. All he needed was for Lucifer to wander so carelessly into his little trap. He couldn't wait for the look on his face when he realized he couldn't get out.

#;;vox #;;to be a god #hells-greatestdad #I hope this is ok!

@hells-greatestdad asked: Don't mind the King of Hell, he's just leaving behind teeny tiny little wooden ducks all over the place for people to find. (Aimed at Charlie, but he's leaving them all over the hotel lobby and various other places on site)

THIS IS THE FIFTH ONE SHE'S FOUND IN FIVE MINUTES. Okay, okay, so maybe it was getting a bit of stink-eye from some of the guests. But that's only because every time she finds one, she overreacts. She scoops the latest one up, and adds it to her little collection on the reception desk, all neatly lined up to greet the guests as they arrive.

[Text: Dad] How many of these do you have?!?!?!

#ic #c ; charlie #hells-greatestdad #aweakahdkjg awwww

A sigh. She misses Lucifer. (Specifically, @hells-greatestdad.)

#hells-greatestdad #Just sending love Collie hope yer doing okay <333

💬 0 🔁 0 ❤️ 1 · ".....Lu, what are you doing here. And why the fuck is there an egg." (Cue Adam in his own turf and an egg. XD) "Just ret

@hells-greatestdad

Adam just kept having that stiff look. He was looking awful as ever, but at least he was wearing more heavy metal attire. The stuff that screamed ' fuck you' to Big G and the seraphs and oozed rage.

He scrunched his nose at the egg.

" One, eggs are fucking disgusting and I won't eat something that came out of someone's ass. Two....what, you think suddenly I'm a free babysitter for any orphaned angel eggs out there?"

He really wanted to get drunk. So fucking drunk that the wastoid cat living in the hotel looked sober.

#call me dickmaster! (adam)#Hells-greatestdad

@hells-greatestdad wanted a reunion that's been a long time coming.

"LUCIIIII!!!!!!" There was only one sickeningly hyper, bubbly and loving being that gave him that nickname. It was Em, after everything that had happened? She was here again, had been for a while in her sacrifices to help his daughter and indirectly him. The Seraphim certainly had been busy now that she was allowed to go to the Hotel, though with rumors of her becoming a Diplomat soon as well to take Adam and Sera's place for talks and diplomatic deals with Hell after their leadership fell through.

Regardless, they hadn't gotten a chance to talk... which they still technically didn't as she had canonball'd at him directly in a tackle-hug, knocking him to the floor. There was quite a bit of force behind it as those wings of hers fluffed and flapped as he was held in an iron-tight hug, both sitting partially on the ground together now. "Luci!!!! Hi, hello, hi, hello- I mean- hey! It's me- Emily! It's so good to see you again after!!! Nearly forever!" Those eyes shimmered in purity and joy into his, yet watered slightly, threatening to happy cry. She might not realize his nickname is Luz now or it might just be her nickname for him.

#ic #the virtue of hope #hellsgreatestdad #hells-greatestdad #//I feel like realistically they would or SHOULD know each other since they're both ancient beings. Ty for approval.

@hells-greatestdad replied to your post “Has he fallen asleep this this? Possibly. Should...”:

Places a rubber duck on top

The King of Hell should praise himself lucky that The Radio Demon is currently out cold.

#hells-greatestdad #alastors-radioshow #::How Entertaining!:: - Dash Commentary #//Fun fact! Alastor is an insomniac and often goes several days without sleep #//So he often simply passes out because of over exhaustion

// 🍁 + are Vaggi and other Exorcists entirely Heavenborn in your eyes? (Not remembering if this has ever been talked about on your blog before)

The simple. answer to this is "yes, 99.9% of the exorcists are heavenborn in my eyes," because I think on the whole they were either created by Adam or for Adam (depending on how much creation magic he actually has access to), and they were created specifically to be assassins.

However, the fact that Vaggi canonically speaks at least some degree Spanish made this more complicated.

Now I know Doylist explanation for this is that Pilot Vaggie was not an angel at all, but a Sinner who was just a Latina in life (I think Venezuelan, but don't quote me on that). But ever since it was made clear this is not true of her canon character, I felt compelled to create a Watsonian explanation for it. And my intital solution to that was Gabriella.

I've since tweaked what little lore I had around this tentative OC after season 2 when we were given that cutie with the fluffy white hair, but it still boils down to a genuine Winner being amongst the Exorcist ranks for at least some period of time. And maybe she was the only exception, maybe she remained the only exception after it didn't go so well.

In any case, my Vaggi is defintely heavenborn and was created specifically for the extermination like most of her sisters. And since we now know the exterminations started about 7 years prior to season 1, that does indeed make my Vaggi's age like...roughly 8 or 9 years old. Maybe 10, depending on if there was prep time prior to the first instance of the cull.

But she was "born" an adult so it's not like it's weird or anything, it just means she hasn't been around long.

#OOC #meme replies #hells-greatestdad

"Huh... I had no idea you could get pregnant"

Lucifer, shut your mouth

"I'm going to hold your hand when I say this. Wait, actually, let me educate you. So during the process of intercourse once the sperm is released, it looks for an egg. Once the sperm comes in contact with the egg, the egg is now fertilized and becomes a zygote. Then from zygote it becomes an embryo. Embryo to a fetus. Then once it's complete and leaves the womb, a baby!"