Discover Top Posts Tagged with #hereinthemargins

Haha hey I definitely meant "I DON'T find that much issue with what you said" in my first message, I'm guessing you understood though. have a nice day

(ha whoops, the perils of tumblr’s garbage messaging system)

have a nice day!

#hereinthemargins

Hey, I'm not too interested in continuing the discussion through reblogs since I find that much issue with what you said and since it's a lot of long replies for you/your followers.... (Feel free to publish these asks if it serves you though.) Tl;dr I just don't think fandom is some necessary protected right or whatever, artists/writers don't have the right to an audience, it sucks that some survivors need to write rape fic to process, but I just don't think all parts of a journey (cont)

(part 2) journey through trauma are things that you put in a public eye. If someone is writing some severe rape or whatever to process what's happened to them, as venting or something, then maybe they should consider who the exact audience for that would be... why would they feel comfortable writing and publishing that to a wide enough audience that they'd be harassed, but not saying they're a survivor? .... I know that my opinions are coloured by my own experience, I grew up wishing I was allowed to call it abuse, and "survivor" has never felt like a brand. I don't exist in a fandom community in which survivor is a brand. Because that would be toxic and not something one would WANT to engage in, and I strongly believe in by us for us... I realize policing non-survivors inevitably polices some actual survivors, because there's no flawless way to apply any ideology to such a large and disconnected group as fandom. It's just that, white people should say they are white in a public, online discussion about race, etc, non-survivors should say they are non-survivors when engaging with abuse and rape. It's a struggle for me to think that anyone who wants to take pleasure out of the idea of my or rape/sa survivors' experiences should be able to say whatever they want, publish whatever they want, espouse whatever harmful opinions they have in a society/community where survivors DO get harassed for processing through writing.

You’re right, the conversation has wandered quite a bit off the original post. Anyway, I’ve found that it’s actually cathartic as hell to post up fic like that, and to have people understand. And it’s cathartic to find fic like that, and know you’re not alone, and see how other people work things out, and bond over shared understanding. There’s definitely a sense of community - it’s not just airing your dirty laundry in front of an aghast group who just wants to have fun; there is both a need to write and a need to read.

And as for the contrast between people’s need for privacy and people’s need to publish private things, it’s a matter of control and comfort. Most people can’t just jump straight into writing about really raw, vulnerable things, they need a warm-up, and a community where they know they won’t be judged or hurt. That’s why kinkmemes allow all sorts of wild shit - if there are no holds barred, nothing forbidden, people can work through their shame and hangups. Plenty of people also consume fic without outing themselves, and pressure and judgment affect them too, not just content producers. Policing is often very tone deaf, and I have seen it silence far more people than it protects, and silence the same people it’s trying to protect.

The thing is, non-survivors can easily admit that they are non-survivors, just like white people can say they’re white. However, if you set up a system where non-survivors are obliged to disclose, the survivors have to either lie or get outed. Not everyone wants to out themselves. Not everyone has the ability to handle what happened, or to handle talking about it. Not everyone wants people to think differently of them. Not everyone feels like what happened to them “counted” or “was bad enough” and internet strangers definitely aren’t qualified to make that call for them. Not everyone has stopped blaming themselves. It’s complicated and ugly because, of course, it’s about trauma. This is some therapist-grade shit, and it’s not actually comparable to admitting you’re white. “I’m a survivor” is a deeply personal identity some people choose to wear openly, and some try to put behind them. It’s not something that can be reduced to a doctor’s not to write whatever you want, or button for ending internet arguments. That’s why I believe that nobody should be expected to disclose automatically.

And on top of that, there’s the fact that, well, we do live in a horrible patriarchal rape culture where even if someone hasn’t been sexually assaulted yet, there’s a definite possibility it can, and people grow up with fear and expectation and varying degrees of sexual trauma that may or may not tip the scales into “survivor”. There’s a widespread tension and wariness even in non-survivors, and interest in processing their experiences and fears. It’s not really comparable to other marginalized groups in that respect. So I tend to err on the side of “it’s fine to work out your feelings about the elephant in the room, even if it hasn’t stepped on your foot (much) yet.”

#hereinthemargins

☆☆

Over The Moon - Cher Lloyd

I’m over the moon, doing my thing, doing my thingI’m over the moon, just doing my thing and I won’t come down!

I Know I Know I Know - Tegan and Sara

I know I know I know what else are we here forThe same as I love you, you’ll always love me tooThis love isn’t good unless it’s me and youStick your hands inside of my pocketsKeep them warm while I’m still hereTell them this love hasn’t changed me, hasn’t changed me at all

#preguntame #hereinthemargins #thank you !!!#dimelo

B, H, R?

B - A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

Hm, u know i never considered Ger567mano until @aph-determination came along

H - What is your favorite source text for fandom stuff (e.g., TV shows, movies, books, anime, Western animation, etc.)?

Ah pft i dont know i dont have a favorite but i do watch Netflix alot since its what i have the time and energy for. so whatever is on netflix i guess

R - Which friendship/platonic relationship is your favorite in fandom?

I gotta say i love qp nedden and luna and harry

#srry this took so long bleh i waas so excited but tired then i forgeot #hereinthemargins #preguntame #dimelo

gym leader thing! first thought was psychic type and espeon for some reason, but what about ice type with a castform?

I like that thought. I’m more into the espeon one def bc I actually don’t know castform that well, but ice is super cool. I like the ice/psychic/water types for sureThis is cool for reals.

#hereinthemargins #dimelo