Hey what are they like in jealousy, both of them, have they ever doubted their affections were unrequited? Who confesses first? Don't know if you've answered these 😅
hey <3 so many questions! thank you
Arthur and Alasdair are remarkably alike but one of the ways in which they are not is how they deal with jealousy.
Alasdair isn’t ashamed of how zealous he can be, and that certainly extends to jealousy. I don’t see nations as being particularly concerned with monogamy but Alasdair in particular is… focused. When it comes to Arthur especially. His jealousy is as possessive as it protective (and more than a little cocky).
I’ve talked a little before of how I see Alasdair as being the first one to accept what he feels for Arthur but I haven’t talked of this: when he realises that he loves Arthur, that’s it. He’s been had. He knows himself enough to know that even if Arthur never loves him back in the same way, he cannot change what he feels (and that deep down, he doesn’t want to). It’s one of the reasons why it takes Arthur much longer to catch on to what’s going on; Alasdair never fundamentally changes how he treats him and doesn’t pursue Arthur actively for a long time (or it’s more like he’s not pursuing Arthur in a way Arthur recognises. He’s not obvious like say, Francis or Alfred would be, but if Arthur had looked a little harder it would have spared them both a lot.)
Arthur internalises jealousy, lets it feed off insecurities which he would sooner die than admit to. He doubts and overthinks, and bristles at the suggestion that it could be easy, he could just let himself have this. It isn’t a ploy or a joke at his expense, it's not Alasdair having him on.
It makes Alasdair want to bury his fingers in Arthur’s hair and tug on his roots until he stops thinking. (And he does fist Arthur’s hair and give him a shake. Nudge his thigh. Bite the bend of his neck, when Arthur has been quiet for too long or looks troubled.)
As for confessions— it’s hard to say.
Because they have both confessed.
Multiple times.
Privately, in public, drunk, sober. Grand, angry declarations, quiet wordless confessions. It’s just that by a silent, unacknowledged agreement, sometimes they just pretend nothing happened. They are infuriatingly stubborn, BOTH of them. I could go on about that for ages. But for the official confession well, I think it’s nothing grand; if anything it's almost a little awkward.
Just feels like coming home.