been thinking... I want Rafa out of the Brotherhood. but I don’t want him to just leave. I want him kicked out, vilified, left with no friends, no resources. just the clothes on his back. and I want all of that to happen and he’ll still believe in the Brotherhood, and what they used to stand for, and their mission. I want him to feel utterly alone and with no goals in life.
now picture: Institute Rafa.
a young man in his mid twenties, who was formerly allied with one of the Institute’s biggest enemies, asked to join because he is both a formidable soldier and a gifted physician. before being kicked out, I imagine he was sent on missions - for Cade, Quinlan, Neriah. I think he went too far sometimes. did things he promised himself he wouldn’t do. it felt justified at the time - he saw much, did much, but also learned much. he was ruthless, maybe cruel sometimes, yes. but for once he felt like he’d done something useful. maybe he did - maybe while collecting samples for Neriah he discovered a new compound. a poison. an anesthetic? maybe he managed to make his sewing people up more efficient. whatever it is he discovered, it was costly. his methods weren’t even close to humane. he stopped just before the guilt was too strong to handle. and whatever he discovered would be useful for the Institute. maybe what he discovered would be benefitial when developing new synths?
so I want him in there, either joining voluntarily or being kidnapped, it doesn’t really matter. I want him conflicted - because the Institute is both something he’s always wanted and the biggest example of everything he stood against. he’s far from the wasteland, he has a mission, he has friends, weird people who understand him. and for once he’s questioning what it is he believes. why is the Institute so bad? the Brotherhood also tests creatures. the Brotherhood also kills people. he’ll be so confused everything will be a blur for a while. he’ll find something to put his mind to - he has a mission, he has goals, and for once life is not dull.
but I also want him out of the Institute eventually, and the man that leaves is very different from the one who entered. I want him to leave because he wanted to leave, because he stopped to think about all he’s seen and done and decided he can’t do this anymore. I want him hoping for a new life under the sun. I want him to feel like his knowledge means nothing if he can’t put it to good use. I want him to feel like he got his wishes - he isolated himself from the dirty and the ugly in his pristine quarters -, and now he feels empty. I want him to feel like he’s taken so much from the Commonwealth and its people without ever giving anything back.
he leaves the Institute then, but not before destroying his work, maybe poisoning the water supply, stealing a shitton of data. something to give him an edge, whatever it is. something to help him feel like he at least weakened the Commonwealth boogeyman. something to make him feel like he was a victim, and not complacent, because he can’t handle that guilt.
what happens then I’m not sure. maybe he’ll start living as a scavenger to get by. maybe he’ll open shop somewhere shady, or even better: maybe he becomes a mysterious doctor who’s never in the same place twice and treats people for free. he leaves the Commonwealth eventually, to try and help people wherever he can reach.
something tells me he’ll make his way to California at some point, and he’ll meet an equally somber young man who’s obsessed with death but has a good heart. for once he’ll have someone who admires him, even though that person is extremely sassy and can’t seem to admit it.