#iapetusneume

[defira85]

You are reminding me about how I want to try to finish my Nathaniel/Anders/Justice fic set in DA2.

We'll always find each other again in Awakening no matter how many fandoms we go through in the meantime 💜

[feralkwe]

omg for the fanvid with taio cruz and ludacris, was it the Anders/Hawke one with the Mysterious Man cameo?

you mean this one?

because it lives rent-free in my head going on *checks notes* 13 years later?

[elfyourmother]

💢

Ship that is most misunderstood: 💢

idk how to really talk about this without sounding like a self-important asshole/fun police tbh but Estinien/WoL and specifically Estinien/non DRG-WoL

most of that is based in what i feel is some really annoying flanderization that happens with Estinien (that I think even the game has become guilty of tbh--I really Did Not Like what they did with him in ShB and it’s one of the reasons I still rank HW higher than it) but I have seen a post or two downplaying the likelihood of him developing any sort of meaningful bond with a WoL who isn’t a Dragoon, which is patently ridiculous

like, if you never leveled DRG by the time you get to the post ARR quests (like me), your literal first introduction to Estinien is that meeting in the intercessory at Camp Dragonhead where Aymeric introduces you to him. and I’m not sure I can quite describe the intensity of the sexual tension of that intro esp. if this is your first time meeting him. The way the camera pans up his body from his boots on up (with a crotch shot no less lmao) as he does That Dragoon Strut is 100% the way Femme Fatales are introduced. And he sounds nearly as thirsty as Aymeric does but way less subtle--“my blood fair sang" is what he says re: the WoL, which actually reads as way more loaded a line to me than the DRG version, where he’s happy to see his old comrade

that one scene had me shipping him with Gisele before I even really knew what he was like lol

but I think this is a lot like f*nhawke in the sense that once characters get put in the “brusque & grouchy” box people really love to flanderize them and don’t like to let them grow--the idea that Estinien doesn’t become warmer unless you do those DRG quests with him is just fucking dumb but I’ve seen it said more than once. i mean regardless, he literally rescues WoL from Elidizenos. and he’s always been fiercely protective of WoL--look how way back on the Road Trip he calls Alphinaud out on treating WoL like an attack dog, and how frustrated he is that he can’t go with them to fight Ravana too.

re: the Ghimlyt Dark, people would rather make lame “haha he put WoL in the dirt” memes than consider the very real likelihood that he was being reminded of old childhood trauma seeing someone he cares about passed tf out in a field of carnage, on top of just “he doesn’t like goodbyes” stuff. (btw, also consider that he took them to Aymeric. Not the Adder camp that was probably full of conjurers, but Aymeric. the person he trusts most in the world.)

he doesn’t get ~extra special character development only for DRG~. what DRG does is add another obvious battle couple layer to it and slightly more canon opportunities for interactions. but it’s all still there regardless and it’s no less meaningful than “wow we both got chosen by the Eye”. I’m thinking specifically here of the Aery fight against Nid--imagine a tank WoL protecting him when he’s trying to use the Eye, or in Gisele’s case being his pocket healer for it. and no matter what, WoL fulfills his duty for him in the end, and saves him in the process.

[faejilly]

@iapetusneume replied to your post “guess who is EMPLOYED  it is seasonal retail hell but whatever, I have...”

it's really easy with seasonal work to be like "I'd like some extra money for the holidays" and no one bats an eye. That said, congrats!

@syzara replied to your post “guess who is EMPLOYED  it is seasonal retail hell but whatever, I have...”

congrats!!

@balyhane replied to your post “guess who is EMPLOYED  it is seasonal retail hell but whatever, I have...”

congrats!

@ladymatt replied to your post “guess who is EMPLOYED  it is seasonal retail hell but whatever, I have...”

Congrats!����

THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE 💖

@miss-shiva-adler replied to your post “There’s a problem, when you’re a caretaker/protector on a...”

interesting psychiatric/psychological terms for this kind of behavior are parentification and atlas personality

that is Alec isn’t it, turning himself into Atlas and carrying the weight of the world... 

@shadoedseptmbr replied to your post “top 10 of the most heartwarming things about sh”

Look, the fastest way to *my* heart is certainly through the 3rd and 4th rib

*snerk* ilu

and your stabby ladies

@shadoedseptmbr replied to your post “@shadoedseptmbr replied to your post “so now that she got an emmy...”

I really want to see it! New things are hard, sometimes tho. But the clips of her I've seen are amazing she really is riveting

she is! I can only watch, like. AN episode at a time? But I do still recommend it.

@elfyourmother replied to your post “@shadoedseptmbr replied to your post “so now that she got an emmy...”

❤️❤️❤️

🥰😘

[inyri]

Just in case:

@iapetusneume I did not see an ask from you this week (that’s Tumblr for you)- feel free to resend or hit me up here if it keeps getting eaten.

[defira85]

My other cats it will take time for me to find more pictures of them being photogenic, but until then have my permanent smol-cat, Flonne. (Yes, she broke those blinds to climb on the window.)

She's IMPROVING the window, she's thinking about your resale value, gosh

(SHE'S TEENY!!!!)

[feralkwe]

For the Director's Cut: To The Edge (And Back Again)

Also, i just want to congratulate you on your exquisite taste of being an Elidibus fan. He is so <3

to the edge (and back again)

this dinged danged fic may be the best work i've ever published. it is, hands down, the one i am most proud of writing, and definitely the one i worked the hardest on. so many lovely little threads to pull together. i spent so much time reading so much lore, combing wikis, sifting through short stories with a fine toothed comb. listening to music. replaying cutscenes. i've never worked so hard to get the lore so right (and i still made some pretty big errors!). it is the most work i've put into a fic ever, and my only chaptered canon character centric work. in a way, it was my white whale. it is by and far the most popular fic i've ever written.

the shb patches gently and slowly broke me as the more we learn about elidibus through them the more he broke my heart. in the beginning i was furious about what he does to ardbert, and it quickly evolved and i felt awful by the conclusion. at the end of the trial the wol is putting down the remaining shell of a very broken man, angry and mad and absent the memories of why he is so driven, and in the throws of rage in his grief at being the last of the unsundered. there was no glory in that victory. nothing to take pride in. it is quickly apparent after anamnesis anyder that he is unwell. even y'shtola mentions that it seems like a mercy killing put in motion by emet-selch. i think the game meant for me to be very sad about one thing at the end of seat of sacrifice, but i was very, very wrapped up in elidibus' fate. the wol has no choice but to stop him, and the only way to stop him is to kill him. i was devastated that it came to that. perhaps being someone who suffers from psychosis made it personal. i couldn't say for sure.

and then after all of it, he gives the very last of his self, his essence, to send us back in time to do what he could not.

it was some time before i did the pandaemonium raids, and they smacked me in the face from the moment you drop into elpis. i became preoccupied with elidibus (and since i played them so late, i already knew the themis-elidibus connection). how did this clever, sweet, smart, driven, and oh so young man who valued his job and duty above all else, get to "i'm going to sacrifice myself to give life to god?"

more than that, the overarching story of ffxiv reinforces a falsehood that zodiark was corrupt, power hungry, and even the source of all evil right up until fandaniel actually corrupts him. this just is not true. even though the writers carefully leave us a trail of crumbs to lead us to question the in-world narrative of zodiark's motivations and morality, much of fandom blithely accepts hydaelyn's misleading of the wol and the word of the lopporits, who are unreliable, being literal creations of hydaelyn herself. the zodiark plan worked. the souls who sacrificed themselves saved the world, at least bought it time. and elidibus somehow got to a place where he felt it was his sole responsibility to bear it all.

it worked. and the burden broke him on the most fundamental level even before hydaelyn made her choices.

that journey gripped me so hard that i had to tell that story. i had to set the record straight in a way that satisfied me. the souls who fueled the creation of hydaelyn get to be literal gods. the souls sacrificed to zodiark are all but forgotten. we only know one of their names. elidibus fought until his last breath for them, for better or for worse. that has to matter.

and now i kill him at least once a week in the hopes of getting my hands on that "fleeting moments" orchestrion. i begged forced my free company to help me do the seat of sacrifice (extreme) so i could get the axe that drops.

so, thank you for this ask. i am so normal about elidibus in a way i've never been normal about another fictional character before.

[elfyourmother]

omg your new icon is so pretty!!!!!

Thanks it’s one of my fave recent Gisele crimes