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bittersweet (an OC centric-drabble)

Being in a new environment is scary, that much is obvious. It’s even scarier when the world around you has nonsensical rules that don’t make a lick of sense. Plants growing out of magic, flying broomsticks, mirrors that transport you to another place, little dimensional pockets, those sorts of things.

It’s strange. It’s weird. It’s like a mix of candies and you’re not really sure what you’re getting. Sometimes it's bad, sometimes it’s good, sometimes it’s something you’ve eaten before, and sometimes it’s so disgusting you’d wonder who the fuck agreed to produce this.

But sometimes, it tastes sour and sweet. Bittersweet.

That’s what Valie thinks when she watches Ace and Deuce run to class together, butting heads but laughing all the same.

That’s what Valie feels when she catches Jack and Epel quietly talking to each other, shoulders bumping ever so softly.

That’s what stirs in her heart when she notices the dusty pink hue on Himawari’s and Sebek’s cheeks when they speak to each other.

A sweet dash of adoration. It makes you fall and dive into deeper depths you’d never thought you’d expect. It’s something that gets your heart pounding, your ears ringing, your fingers shaking, your face burning. It makes you notice things you never thought you’d notice.

How big their hands are. How their eyes twinkle when it catches the sun. How their smile curves when they see something they like. How warm they feel. How cute they are. How determined they are when reaching their goals.

How they look when they stare at something they love.

A bitter aftertaste. It pauses you in your tracks, makes you freeze up and tense. You try to avoid them. What was once a soft, warm glow becomes something you ignore over and over again.

It’s love. Valie thinks when she sees Ace and Deuce kissing, clumsy lips crashing into one another, passionately expressing their love in the way they know. The cheerful tone she uses to tease them proofs it. I want the best from them.

It’s love, Valie believes when she witnesses Epel shyly envelope his hands around Jack, the latter’s tail quickly wagging at the action. The small wink she sends their way as she passes them is confirmation

It’s love, Valie concludes when she spots Hima and Sebek behind Ramshackle, faces red and eyes averted. The teasing whistle she lets out is a testament.

It’s love. Valie insists, even when her heart drops, even when dread fills her lungs, even when tears pour down her face.

It’s love. Even when she couldn’t face them for a week. Even when they beg her to come out and tell them what’s wrong. Even when she sees their faces twist into worry.

It’s love! It has to be!

It’s how love is, isn’t it? For it to feel so light and lovely, to make you feel like you’re nothing without it, only for it to crush you after. To leave you longing for more.

A small voice tells her it’s not how it is.

Valie doesn’t listen.

It’s love, why wouldn’t it be?

“Is my cute little junior okay?” Valie’s eyes snap, but she nods. Her tongue is numb from all the ice cream she ate, but she can always patch herself up with hot coco later.

“‘M fine, Cater. Just…” Valie stands up and stretches, muscles contouring to make a satisfying crack! “Just tired, that's all.”

“Hmm.” Cater hums, going back to his phone. His eyes are sunken, with black circles under them. He doesn’t press, and neither does she. For about 10 seconds because she’s so curious! Is there a difficult test for the third-years? Is

“Cater, your eyes…” Valie reaches up to touch his eye bags, thumbs moving in a circular motion under them. “Damn, when was the last time you slept?”

Cater laughs, setting down his phone, gently peeling her hands off his eyes. It’s nice, don’t get him wrong but it almost feels belittling when she does it. He’s sure she doesn’t know that. Her look of concern shows it all.

“Yesterday~! Is it showing?” Cater frowns, massaging his under eyes himself.

“You sure? At what time? ‘Cuz, like not to be mean, but… you did a crap job with the foundation, my dear senior. Also, I don’t think any type of foundation can cover that up, even the one’s Vil gives to you.”

Cater twitches at the name, and Valie catches the act. What? She burrows her eyebrows. Did Vil do something?

“Ah, right~! I must’ve done a pretty bad job if you can see it, huh?” Cater teases, an easy smile slipping past his lips, but it doesn’t reach his eyes.

Most of his smiles don’t reach his eyes. Valie realizes, a silent gasp falling from her lips. It only does that when he’s with…

“Vil.” Again, Cater freezes. Valie’s mind whirls. What has Vil been doing?

Valie shifts through her memories, quickly sorting them until- ah.

He’s dating someone, isn’t he? Wait, so Cater likes...The look of understanding is displayed clearly on her face, and Cater feels like drowning.

Was he so obvious that his little oblivious junior realized?

“Cater…” He braces himself for the question, shutting his eyes. “... what song do you want to play?”

Cater’s eyes snap open. Okay, he wasn’t expecting that. “What?”

Valie repeats her question, pointing towards the guitar he often plays with. “Do you wanna play ‘The Wolf’ by DeKo.28? We’ve been practising, right?”

Cater feels himself nod. “Right. ..right.”

“...Okay nevermind I can’t take this anymore-! Cater-,” Valie points at her senior with her drumstick. “Do you crush on Vil?! Cuz I can’t help but feel like you do.”

There it is. There’s the question. Cater lets out a heavy sigh of relief.

“... Yeah.” Cater nods, and that’s all Valie needs to know. She drops her drumsticks and runs to him, throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him close.

“I’m sorry.” It comes out in a whisper. “I’m so sorry…”

Then, Cater feels something wet fall on his shoulder. What?

He pulls away and what he sees is… Valie.. Crying?

“...uhm.” Is all Cater manages. Valie nods in his confusion, laughing.

“It's kinda weird innit… you’re da wan going through heartbreak and I’m the one crying..” She sniffs loudly. “But, like… I FEEL YOU.. CATER…”

“IT’S LIKE, IT’S LIKE…” She sniffs, blinking harshly. “It’s like you feel ALL bubbly & stuff but then you kinda feel like shit after that..?? Like, it hurts?? So much??? Like a fucking- a fuckin’ meteor through the heart or somethin- I don’t know….”

He knows. He knows all too well.

“And it’s like… so stupid cuz it’s like ‘DAMN, I’m totally never gonna get with that person, but FUCK you I’m going to crush on them anyway HA!’ and- and-” She grips his shoulders. “AND IT FUCKING SUCKS!”

“Yeah, it does.” Cater agrees.

“See?! You feel me, don’t ‘cha, Cater?! You totes feel me, right?! Like, argh! I wanna throw my heart away and stuff!!!” She angrily grumbles, swinging her fists. “It totally fucking sucks!”

“Mood.”

“MOOD, OH IT'S SUCK A MOOD!” Valie wails, going to hug Cater again. “Man,,, man…”

“Man… man…” Cater copies her, wrapping his arms around her. “It sucks.”

“For realsies. When Lilia and Kalim get here we’re gonna watch a sad movie and sob.”

“That’s the agenda for today?”

“Yeah.”

“Sure.”