So I ended up playing Driven to Win
Here’s my review:
-Lightning McQueen drowns -Chick has a dressing room for his tv show (why?? All the cars are naked anyway) -The only original voice actor is Darrel Waltrip, but every line he has echoes as if he was a disembodied ghost in a post-apocalyptic cityscape -Sally’s Got A Huge Mouth For No Reason -Miss Fritter NEVER shuts up about her whump kink -if McQueen is jumping, you betcha he’s got his damn tongue out -award for the sickest burns: Cruz -there’s a mode where you have to kill as many debatably sentient cars as possible. They’re like regular Pixar cars only they have a metal sheet bolted to their windshield and have no mouth. Faceless, but self-autonomous. You get bonus points for multi-kills. -Mack somehow lost all of his baseball hats, which are suspended high in midair and glow red as if they were alien probes waiting to scorch the earth, also this means that Mack has been wearing a HAT the ENTIRE TIME,
And that’s only the first third of the game.