Ch. 7: Folded.
blurb: he keeps showing up. and somehow… you stopped wanting him to leave.
summary: what started as annoyance has slowly turned into something harder to ignore. connie’s everywhere lately, and no matter how much you try to keep your distance, he keeps finding ways around it. the closer the two of you get, the harder it becomes to pretend this is nothing. and honestly? that might be the scariest part.
warnings: mild suggestive content, flirting, emotional vulnerability, trust issues, food mentions, connie climbing trees again unfortunately, i was hungry when i wrote this leave me alone.
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it was late in the day when you were sitting in the library, studying for your test coming up in one of your fashion classes. you had been there for about an hour and a half, and your brain was starting to tap out. you were thinking about wrapping up soon because classes were early today and you told eren that you were gonna stay on campus longer so you could study at the library. he and his friends are always too loud at home so you can never focus, which he understood.
before you could even think about packing your stuff away, sasha slid into the chair across from you like she had been standing nearby, debating if she should interrupt you or not.
there was no greeting, but it wasn't awkward either. she just got straight to talking.
“i owe you another apology,” she said quietly. partially because you guys were in a library right now but the other part was because she was ashamed.
you raise an eyebrow, allowing her to continue on.
“i talked about you,” she admits. “after the fight. i shouldn’t have.”
you study her for a moment, thinking about how you’ve never had someone take accountability for anything they’ve done to you let alone something that you didn't even know about. so you just nod.
“thanks for telling me.”
she fidgets with her sleeve. “you didn’t deserve any of that.”
you don’t say it’s okay.
you say, “i know.”
and that’s when sasha smiles. small. relieved. that was enough for her. as long as everything was out in the open between you two she really wanted to try being friends with you. so… she took this as her chance.
“you hungry?” she asks you, nervous of how you were going to respond to the sudden change of conversation.
but if there was one thing you were always down for, it was food.
“oh baby, i can always eatttt.” you said, a smile growing on your face.
you both gathered your belongings and hustled out of the library, the thought of food exciting you.
“you know, i should’ve known you were a foodie because of your damn instagram.” you said with a laugh as you both pushed out the library doors.
”i mean duh, how do you think i got this thick? plus my parents fed me a lottt as a kid.” she laughed along with you. the two of you started making you way to the student parking lot because sasha said she had her car and was willing to drive the both of you. (and also because she didn't feel like walking the whole way there).
so you and sasha hopped into her car, you noticed how cute her interior decorations were, buckled up, connected to the aux and headed to your destination.
it was about a 5 minute car ride to the ramen shop you both agreed on. it didn't take long for either of you to grab your wallets, unbuckle and walk through the shop’s doors.
the little bell above you rang as you entered the small family restaurant, letting the hostess know a new customer had arrived. you both walked to the front noticing you had to order your food before you sat.
sasha watched as you joked with the cashier, she was a young girl about the same age as you two. she watched as you rolled your eyes when your card declined and immediately switched to another card which then, approved. she notices how you laugh like there isn’t a weight on your shoulders.
she finally says, “you’re… not what i expected.”
you glance at her. “what did you expect?”
she shrugs. “someone meaner. louder.”
you smirk. “is it because im black??”
sasha laughed nervously, her face immediately turning red. she looked like she just got called into the dean's office.
“no! no its not that i was just thinking in terms of our first interaction and your personality—" she started to ramble before you cut her off
”babes im just joking, youre gonna have to get used to that, fuckin with me.” you said as you both laughed off her reaction.
that’s it. that’s the moment.
the moment that you can truly say that you and sasha became friends.
as the laughter died down sasha turned her attention to you again.
“so who’s card did you use?” she asked, a small, yet knowing smirk on her face.
“my brother. girl you already know his money is my money too, thangya!” you said, knowing you could go on a shopping spree with eren’s card and all he would do is ask you what you bought.
sasha laughed in response, a smile on her face as she already knew that was the answer.
“buuuut…” you started as you noticed the waiter coming to your table with your food in hand.
he placed your bowls in front of you and asked if you needed anything else before he departed. you both said no and he politely bowed before returning to the staff only area.
sasha looked back at you, waiting for you to continue, but when you didnt she got impatient. “buuuuttt what girl you cant just start like that and not finish!”
she needed the tea.
you sighed, finishing the food in your mouth before you answered her.
“that… weird thing keeps happening.” you said it like it wasn't the most insane thing shes heard today and on top of that she could tell you were dodging on purpose.
“that thing?? bitch just tell me.” she said, covering her mouth to accommodate the food she was chewing.
you let out an even bigger sigh, knowing you weren't getting out of this.
“connie! he keeps dropping off snacks on my balcony. its been like more than two weeks since the basket i told you about.”
all sasha could do is stare at you.
“he’s consistently climbing trees for you?” she was shocked because since when did chivalry come back?
”oh girl bye,” you laughed, taking another bite.
”no but in all seriousness, i think he likes you for real.” the face she made was smug and you hated it.
“but then there's the texts…” you said, sliding that small detail in knowing what she was gonna ask you next.
“bitch huh??? um??? phone? now please.” she said, but the way she said it tickled you a bit.
you laughing for a second before handing your unlocked phone over to her. you chowed down on your food as she read the numerous texts between the two of you. (or mostly connie talking to himself… and you letting him)
sasha set your phone down on the table, smiling at you knowingly.
“y/n, he like you, like you…” she said, knowing her teasing was gonna irritate you but she didn't care.
you sighed, rolling your eyes as you took the last bite of your ramen before you were left with nothing but broth.
you looked back at sasha, debating on what you were gonna say next.
you didn't even know if what you wanted to say was true, or if saying it out loud would jinx it, but you went for it anyway.
“i think we got a little… thing” your voice was quiet and you were hoping that she didn't even hear you over the ambiance of the restaurant.
but she did.
sasha froze mid-bite. she didn't answer immediately this time, picking up on your change of tone. you started telling her how you're nervous because of your previous history and how you haven't “talked” to someone in a while so you're overthinking everything and rightfully so.
sasha finally chimed in asking a genuine question this time.
”how does he make you feel?”
you hesitated before you answered so she kept going.
“does he make you feel the same as the other fuckers you dated or talked to?” she asked, barely getting her full sentence out before you replied,
“no.” it came out too fast to take back. so you paused before taking a breath.
“not at all honestly, but i don't know what he makes me feel.”
sasha sighed, knowing how you felt. “then don’t name it right now. just feel him out… but don't give him a hard time if this is something that you really want.”
you don't answer her, taking a second to soak in her words while you pick at the remnants of the broth sitting in your bowl.
but then, she switches back to the sasha you know.
she started cheesing and teasing you and all you could do was roll your eyes.
“we lost her” she joked leaning back in her seat
”chat, she's gone…” she said, literally pointing and laughing at you, obviously joking.
all you can think is she just gon keep going.
“shes in love with a bald man.” she started cracking up, but you sat up in your seat so quickly.
“hes not bald, it's a buzz cut!!!!” you clarified, laughing despite what she said.
sasha couldn't contain her laughter, “i know that's right girl, defend your man!”
your laugheter died down at the same time as hers and all you could say was “bitch ima fuck you up.”
and then you both burst out laughing again.
“yeah say that again in three days when you're texting him good morning,” she said as she finally finished off the last of her drink.
but when you hesitated, even though it was just for a second, she clocked it immediately.
”oh???” her reaction was priceless.
“bitch you hesitated. you got it badddd” she teased and teased and you just sat there taking it all in.
”i hate you.” you said, finally happy you can let yourself loose with someone.
sasha shook her head, “you love me and you love that man.”
you finally sat back in your seat, "you're insane…”
you shake your head, laughing despite yourself.
sasha just hums in agreement.
“but i'm right though.”
you didn't say anything after. the two of you finished off whatever you had left before grabbing your stuff and heading back to the parking lot.
you were both cracking jokes as you walked back deciding to sit on the hood of her car and just vibe for a bit longer.
the laughter died down naturally, the atmosphere now quiet besides the sounds of nature and cars driving by. there was a small moment where you looked at sasha, really looked at her.
you hadn't realized how much you missed this.
not the drama or the rumors.
just this.
being able to sit across from someone who sees you… and wants to stay.
you bump her leg with your own to grab her attention.
“i did miss you, you know.”
and what you probably love most about sasha is that she doesn’t make it a big thing. she just nudges you back and says,
“i know.” nudging you back like it wasnt a big deal.
and now you knew for sure this girl was gonna be your ride or die.
and you would ride for her too.
it was few days later and you were coming home from school. eren was busy again today so you told him instead of his friends coming to get you, that you’d just ask sasha for a ride. he agreed, figuring you actually trusted the girl now since you were asking her for rides and didn't question you further.
you unlocked your front door, stepping in before waving bye to sasha as she pulled out of your driveway. you closed the door, appreciating the a/c in your house for once since it was a hot day. dropping your bag and kicking your shoes off, you rolled your shoulders to relieve some tension as you walked towards the kitchen.
you stilled in the kitchen doorway as your eyes came in contact with connies. he was sitting on the counter of your kitchen drinking one of erens’ redbulls and munching on something but you couldn't tell what.
he doesn't even look surprised to see you, almost like he was waiting for you to get home.
he takes another sip of his redbull while holding eye contact with you, trying to see if you’d speak first. when you didn't though, he gave in.
“wassup, mi amor.” he said, acting like he hadn’t been waiting here.
you couldn't even focus on what he was saying because your eyes flicked back to your brother's redbull and that food he had.
where the fuck did he get that? like was it something ej bought for me to eat?
but before you assume you decide to respond to him.
”why are you in my house like you pay rent? and what? you just help yourself to shit now?” the attitude in your voice was thick, and connie loved every bit of it.
he slid himself off the counter, walking towards you. “first of all, amor, eren don't care if we take his shit and i bought this food myself.”
he stopped right in front of you but there was still a good amount of space between you.
“second of all, you mad or you just missed me?” he asks, trying to hide how smug he’s being.
you rolled your eyes at him, pushing past as you heard him chuckle at your reaction.
you couldn't help but think that this isn't the first time he’s been here ‘randomly’ but you ignore it for now. opening up the fridge, you grab one of your drinks and look for something to eat with it, but unfortunately you have no luck. you didn't feel like cooking and you ate your last hot pocket last night so if there wasn't anything in the fridge you’d have to order online.
you sigh, closing the fridge and turning to lean against the counter, noticing connie still hasn't left the room.
“you been here a lot lately,” you decided, since he didn't want to leave, that you’d try and see if you could understand him better.
he doesn't even deny your statement.
“i come over here all the time.” he says, because it's true but…
”not when eren’s not home you dont.” you knew you had said something right because connie froze, mid-sip.
his jaw flexed for half a second but it wasn't quick enough to get past you.
got him…
he swallowed his drink a bit slower and you watched him, trying to pick up on something, anything.
“you be noticing when im here?” his tone dipped, but instead of teasing, like he intended, he sounded curious.
you knew this was a trap so you avoided it because you weren't about to play his game.
“it's my house. i notice everything.”
connie just smirked and dropped his gaze, like he knew you were trying to be smart. so he’d just play along with you.
“mm. good.”
you nod, turning your attention to your phone as you push yourself up to sit on the counter, opening up doordash so you could order some food.
connie walked over to you, just wanting to irritate you some more so he leaned over your shoulder a tiny bit.
“what you doin?” his voice dropped now that he was closer to your ear. closer than necessary if you may add. it was like he was testing how much you’d let him get away with. it gave you chills, how bold he was, but it didn't show physically so he didn't notice it.
“can you back up sir im trying to order myself some food.” you said but there was no real bite.
”i seen you eyeing my food when you walked in.” he said, and just the mention of it had you putting your phone down, although you were trying to look annoyed.
“so?” you asked, for once, wanting him to continue talking.
”so you want a bite? its a sandwich i got from the bodega. its a new one they have but i tried it and its so fucking good,” he started ranting and it made you chuckle a bit.
you lowkey thought it was cute how interested he was in telling you about a sandwich from…
what did he call it??
you watched him in his explanation as he walked back to where he left his sandwich so he could bring it to you to try.
but you had a question.
”whats a bodega?” you asked, what you thought was a harmless question but when connie gasped and stopped in his tracks you figured maybe it wasn't.
connie looked at you like what you said was illegal.
“… you serious right now?”
you just stared at him, confused. “what?”
he drags a hand down his face shaking his head, knowing he was just being dramatic.
“ay dios mío… she doesn't know what a bodega is, “ he mumbles under his breath, half to himself and half to the universe.
you fold your arms, adjusting yourself on the counter as you laughed at his overdramatic reaction.
“okay alright relax bodega boy, not everyone grew up wherever you did.” you said.
“nah, nah its not even like that,” connie picked the sandwich back up, holding it like its a trophy. “a bodega is like… corner store. but better. like—“ he literally pauses to emphasize the sandwich in his hands, “you go in for one thing, come out with a whole meal, a drink, and probably a life lesson.”
you raised a brow. “a life lesson?”
”yeah,” he nods, dead serious. “like dont trust nobody who rush your sandwich.”
that makes you genuinely laugh, shaking your head.
“you’re funny.”
“and you're hungry,” he shot back. “we gotta fix that.”
there was something soft in his tone now. not teasing. offering.
he unwrapped the sandwich, showing you all its glory, and gestures for you to take it from him.
“hm. take a bite.”
you look at it.
then at him.
then back at it.
and instead of grabbing it, you tilted your head slightly. (which, first of all, drove connie insane.)
”…no.”
his brows pulled together. “no?”
you lean back on your hands against the counter, eyes flicking up at him just a little too knowingly.
“feed it to me.” you said, holding his gaze like you didn't just cross the line.
you could hear a pin drop, how silent it was.
it wasn't a long silence though as you watch something in his face change. his tongue dragged slowly across his bottom lip before he could stop himself. “you a minx with everyone or you just doin this on purpose?”
you could tell that you were getting him.
and you liked it.
”tik tok, bodega boy.” you said as a smirk played on your lips.
he adjusted his stance as he spoke up. “oh,” a small huff of a laugh followed. “you bougie like that?”
you just shrugged, playing it off like you werent nervous as fuck from how close he was to you.
“do you know who my brother is?” you say casually. “erens been spoiling me since i was like… born. i dont reach for nothing.”
that does it. he's a goner, guys. you're not like any girl he's ever met and now he's really interested.
he steps closer to you, almost close enough to trap you but not quite there yet.
its enough that you feel his presence though, and he made sure of that.
“ight,” he says quietly. “say less.” he steps in like he forgot how much space he was supposed to leave between you.
he grabs half of the sandwich, setting the other half down, and lifts it to your mouth. your eyes stay on his hand at first.
then your gaze meets his.
and now you're both looking at each other.
and it feels way too long for something this simple. the air went from heavy to tense real quick.
and trust, fucking with connie, its the right kind of tense.
”open,” he says, his tone low but not demanding. it wasn't joking either.
you don't even realize you listened until you already have.
he brings the sandwich to your lips, his hand underneath ready to catch anything that falls.
you take a bite and chew but you don't look away and neither does connie.
it's not even about the sandwich anymore.
for either of you.
connie swallows.
hard.
his free hand is flexing at his side like he was fighting the urge to touch you somewhere he shouldn't.
you start feeling the heat between your legs so you swing your right leg over your left, just barely brushing his thigh.
it could’ve been an accident…
but it wasn't.
“its good?” he asked, his voice rougher now, and you noticed it.
you nod slowly, refusing to be the one to break eye contact.
“…yeah.” you paused for a second. “you was right.”
he huffs a soft laugh, shaking his head.
“i usually am” he said, not cocky, but proud.
you could tell, besides the fact that he was looking at you, that he was watching you. almost like he was trying to figure you something out.
connie was about to say something when he was interrupted…
by a car engine.
outside.
both of you freeze. your eyes flick to the window and then back to each other.
you were first to speak. “fuck, its eren,” your voice dropped as if he’d be able to hear you two from all the way in his car.
that immediately shatters the atmosphere that the two of you had created unknowingly.
you hopped off the counter and connie stepped out your way.
you were quick to grab your drink but you looked back when you heard connie wrapping up the rest of the sandwich.
you paused.
then you walked back and snatched it.
“…yo,” he laughs under his breath, “you serious?” but he didn't move to stop you.
you were already halfway out the kitchen, phone, drink and sandwich in hand.
“consider it payment.” you said, as you turned the corner, knowing he’d follow you.
”for what?”
you turn back to him before you head up the stairs, a tiny smirk playing on your lips.
“for being in my house like you pay rent.” you say, giving him a look up and down before trying to hide the fact that your smirk is growing.
you turned to walk up the stairs as you said your last words to him for the day.
“…later, springer.” your eyes dipping down for half a second and then you disappeared upstairs like nothing happened.
connie was confused why you emphasized his last name like that but then he looked down.
it was silent as he stood there for a second.
then he groans, turning to walk to the couch.
“coño…” he said to himself, a hand dragging over his face.
“i need to get it together bro”
he grabs a one of the throw pillow on the couch as he sits down, dropping it on his lap and sighing.
“that girl gon be the death of me, i swear to god…” and the worst part? he wasn't even mad about it
its when he hears keys at the door that hes straightens up. grabbing the controller he turns on the ps5.
his smirk never let his face though…
why would it?
sneaky springer took a w tonight. (in his book at least)
the next night you were sitting on your balcony smoking a blunt. it was another school night and you had finished all you homework so you were texting sasha and scrolling through instagram, giving yourself a little “me” time.
you couldn't help but let your thoughts wander to yesterday.
how close connie was.
you brushing against his leg.
how he was waiting for you when you got home…
it was driving you crazy…
you hadn’t thought of anyone you’ve ever dated this much and in the matter of a few weeks connie has managed to find himself in your head rent free. (of course you’d never let him know that though.)
to satiate your thoughts, you decided to go back and read some of you and connies messages. you were enjoying the night's ambiance as you scrolled, allowing yourself to be absorbed in your blunt and your phone. the wind felt nice against your skin, your night routine already done and pajamas already on you knew you’d be going to bed soon.
you heard a car pull in the driveway, not paying it any mind as you reread the messages connie sent you. you assumed it was eren coming home from getting food until you heard the rustling of leaves below you.
it didn't scare you, at this point you knew it was connie since you had bumped into him sneaking onto your balcony a few times now.
you stood from your seat walking over to lean against your balcony but still looking at your phone.
you heard a familiar soft laugh from below you.
“someone owe you money or something? why you lookin at your phone like that?” he spoke in a low, joking, tone but you weren't that far up so you could hear him fine.
without looking at him you answered, “…you gon fall out that tree one day and im just gonna laugh.”
connie started climbing up the tree like it was a part of his normal workout routine now. “nah. you’d catch me.” he chuckled
you looked at him crazy as he carefully balanced his way over to your balcony’s railing.
“how the hell would i catch you if im up here.” you asked him, trying to hide the smile on your face.
”dont read into it babe... may i?” he gestured, asking if he could step onto your balcony.
that babe word had you freezing for a second before you shook it off and hummed in agreement.
he pulls himself onto the balcony but still leaves a good amount of space between the two of you. he’s acting like he’s learned boundaries…
oh, please you thought as you recalled yesterday, mentally rolling your eyes.
connie, being nosey as ever, peaked at your phone and noticed what you had open. a smile spreading on his face like a wildfire.
”you just like reading my messages or you missed me?”
you huffed a dry laugh and rolled your eyes.
“that must be your favorite thing to say. you text like you talk,”
conie raises a brow. “how?”
”too much.”
he laughed at that one but came back and clocked your tea.
“oh yeah? but you the one sitting here reading them.
you don't deny it like you usually would and he noticed that.
there was a pause for a second before he pulled something out…
its not a full basket this time. its a gift bag. your favorite snacks, the bodega sandwich, and a few drinks were organized into the bag for you. connie pointed out the warhead lollipops which was something he’s never gotten you before.
“they ain’t have the ones you like, the blowpops, so i grabbed these instead… you said you liked sour last time.”
he remembered something that small…?
you feel like you guys had texted about it like once before but you didn't expect him to remember that.
you decide not to thank him directly, instead opening the bag of lollipops, taking one for yourself and then offering one to him.
he’s stunned for a second because you’ve never offered to share anything with him before. that was like the root of the problem when you two met to be fair so this?
this felt like a new kind of high for connie and it only increased when your hands brushed as he took the lollipop from you.
neither one of you pulled away at first, but realizing what you were doing you pulled your hand back and stood up straight.
“you do too much…” you mumbled, as if only you were supposed to hear it.
but connie took a step forward, “you think so? because i dont think i’m doing enough.”
the tone of his voice dropped and it sent chills down your spine.
this time, he noticed.
his eyes moving to meet yours, slower this time.
“…there it is” he smirked, knowing now that he does have an effect on you.
before he could say anything else though you brought yourselves back to reality. “…you should go. eren might be home soon.”
connie took a step back this time as the atmosphere, once again, shattered.
he just played it cool, slowly making his way back to his escape route.
“yeah… i was about to leave anyway.”
he wasn't.
you both knew that.
he lingered for a second before making his way back over the railing and climbing down.
he made his way back to his car giving you one last look before he got in. you stayed on your balcony with your snacks and phone still in hand as you watched him pull out and drive away.
you look at where his car was parked one last time, before turning to your phone and opening his messages again.
after that night connie was everywhere.
you’d bump into him in the kitchen more often than anything and his excuse was always “i got here early im just waiting for the boys.”
but then you’d be leaving to go grab some food with sasha and right as you walk out the door here he come walking up your porch. you sigh heavily. “why are you hereee??”
connie sucks his teeth and grins, “man, i just parked, i aint even get inside yet and you already irritated with me.”
you simply walked away, a soft, “and is.” could be heard as your voice fades away.
you know he couldn't see the knowing smile on your face as you walked but you do know what he was looking at and now you're so glad you put on your good jeans before you left the house…
and then the next time you see him lounging on the couch in your living room you don't even say anything to him. you just roll your eyes and go on about your business, not wanting to interact with him while eren's home because you don't know where it could lead.
he's dropping snacks off weekly. he's sending good morning texts. before it was sometimes you reply and sometimes you dont but now…
the good morning texts have become a daily thing for you. of course you're never texting first but waking up and seeing that connie has texted you good morning has started to become one of your favorite parts of your day.
at this point, you couldn't call it a coincidence anymore…
you couldn't deny that everything he did felt like it meant something.
two weeks since the balcony and you're still seeing connie everywhere. things have changed since then but you still have your doubts about all of this.
it was a friday and you were on facetime with sasha, both of you doing your own thing but yapping with each other here and there. laid out on your bed in your pajama short set, you were enjoying the new show sasha recommended to you when you heard your stomach grumbling.
you groaned aloud, too lazy to go downstairs to grab yourself something to eat. you had forgot to ask eren to restock your fridge so it was currently empty.
“sashimiiiii” you whine, trying to get your friends' attention.
she was doing her nails so she was pretty locked in but she heard you so without looking at the camera she answered you.
”why are you whining and where did this nickname come from?” she asked, a soft laugh mixed into her tone.
“im hungryyy,” you said, wishing she could teleport so she could just go downstairs to get your snacks.
she side eyed the camera, raising a brow. “is that the answer to both questions?” she asked, amused at how lazy you were being because its not common for you.
”yes,” you huffed because she still wasn't solving your problem.
‘’well then get your lazy ass up and go to your kitchen. actin like you dont got hella food downstairs.” she mumbled the last part to herself as she focused on putting a charm on her ring finger but you heard her and just groaned in response.
pausing your show and standing from the bed, you quickly grab your phone and tell sasha you’d be right back before hanging up and heading downstairs to grab yourself something to eat.
unfortunately though you wouldn't be right back. that much was obvious when you made it down the last few steps and looked to see connie blocking the kitchen doorway. you didn't have to avoid him this time because eren isn't home today, so you walked up to him slowly, waiting for him to pull his attention from his phone to you.
“why are you standing in the doorway like you security or something?” you asked him, as you stopped to stand right in front of him.
”what, i cant be at my friends house?” he said, trynna be slick.
you scoffed a bit, second guessing your thoughts from yesterday.
i cant tell with him. maybe he really is just playing with me and he's trynna see how far he can get.
“not when your friend not home.” you said with more attitude than you intended, but you can see how connie notices and straightens up a little bit.
…oh. that did something.
you don't know what but you decided to move past it, opening your phone to immediately text sasha about this.
connie, on the other hand, was processing the attitude you just gave him. it didn't feel like the joking attitude you've had recently, it felt like the attitude you had the day you two met.
he glanced down at your phone to see who you were texting but he didn't quite catch it as you swiped out of the text thread. though, there was something in your texts that did catch his eye. something he felt like he needed to address now.
“you aint even save my number yet ma?” he asked, as he let out a quiet breath through his nose. it was a dry laugh like he was upset almost.
you didn't look up though, just continuing to the fridge as you texted your friend. “you ain't earn one yet.” you said off-handedly, as you set your phone down on the counter and move to open the fridge.
but…
connie catches your wrist before you can reach the handle. it's not tight but stern as he gently turns you to face him. you paused because you didn't even know he was following behind you.
looking at his hand and then at him you realize
…i’m letting him touch me.
why am i letting him touch me?
you don't think to pull away immediately and that's the first thing that alarms you because normally you would.
connie brings you back as he finally speaks up, "don't do me like that.” his voice was quieter.
he wasn't smiling.
he wasn't joking.
you could tell this was… different.
”do you like what? i said it how it is.” you said as you wiggled your wrist out of his grasp. you looked at him for a second but when he didn't say anything you tried to turn back to the fridge.
thats when his hand slides to your hip, pulling you back in place, closer than the two of you have ever been before.
it was dangerous.
it didnt feel aggressive, it just felt… controlled. like connie needed you to just listen for a second.
…okay?
this… is new.
but for once you don't snap, you freeze.
because it’s connie...
so you don’t push him off, you just… stay.
looking at him.
he exhales because he feels like he’s been holding this in for weeks. and he has honestly, from you and himself. but seeing his number still unsaved in your phone all this time makes him want to be more up front with you.
“i don’t know what you think i been doin… but i ain’t been playin with you.”
you scoffed like it was a reflex when you hear someone say those words. it was a defense mechanism that was muscle memory at this point.
”i’ve heard that before,” you say, regretting giving him the chance to speak to you but he tightens his grip on your hip, his other hand coming up to rest on the other side as he held you in front of him. not tight but just enough to keep you there.
the look on his face wasn't one that you've seen on him before.
connie hoped that he wasn't crossing a line by holding your waist like this. it was the only way he could get you to just… not leave yet.
he started to speak again, still quiet, but a bit more rushed like he was just trying to get everything out.
“ight, then hear it again. but listen this time.”
you can't pinpoint what is about this moment that feels differently than the others but still cant help but think, who he feeling like…?
but you don't interrupt so he can keep going.
”you think i'm out here climbin trees for fun?”
”you think i’m droppin stuff off every week ‘cause i'm bored?”
”you think i'm textin you every morning just to run up my phone bill?” he asked, his voice getting lower and lower as he spoke.
connie let out a soft chuckle before he said the next part. because this was the moment for him where he actually started to believe it.
“you think i'm out here rememberin what snacks you like… for what? entertainment?” his voice cracks just slightly, proving to you that he's trying to be vulnerable right now as if his words weren't enough.
he exhales and runs a hand over his face trying to regain himself before he brings his gaze back to meet yours.
“you got me doing shit i dont even recognize.”
you didn't know what it was about this man but his voice right now was sending shivers down our spine but you still had some questions that you wanted answered. just because your brother and his friends graduated from the university you go to doesn't mean people don't talk about them anymore.
especially connie. so you tilted your head at him, eyes narrowing just slightly, “…so what, im supposed to ignore everything i heard about you?”
that was it. the question of the night. connie sighed, knowing he’d have to address this sooner or later but in this moment he’s glad its sooner.
he just nodded, accepting the fact that you probably heard about his history from other girls around campus.
“nah. don’t ignore it.” he drops his eyes to observe his hands on your hips as he speaks, not really proud about the shit he did.
his tone drops as he continues, “thats exactly why your brothers don't want me near you.
your brows pulled together because thats not what you expected.
he took accountability, told me not to ignore it, and explained why…
is he real?!?!
connie continues though, pulling you out of your thoughts again.
“i got a history. i messed with girls before and… yeah…” his voice was soft still, something you noticed when he started getting serious earlier, and you liked when he spoke like this. “i aint even gon clean it up for you… i did what i did and i can't take it back.”
right now, it felt like you were really talking to connie, not that class clown playboy that he always tries to be.
he shrugged slightly but there was no pride in it. he wasn't trying to flex.
his thumb rubbed a small part of your skin that he could reach from where his hands were placed as he continued to let all his thoughts pour out.
“…i just never cared enough to do better.”
that part was heavy. you could tell that connie is definitely outside his comfort zone but he wanted to tell you everything he could before this sudden courage went away.
and then he looks at you again, his eyes drawing over your face as he takes in your appearance over and over.
“i never cared enough to stay either.” he said as he pulled you forward by the grip he had on you, bringing you closer to him the before if that were even possible.
he leaned down towards your ear, wanting you to hear this part clearly.
“…that’s because i ain’t never wanted to stay.”
that the difference…
his grip on your hips loosens slightly for a second, still there, just softer.
“but you…” he pauses, like he's deciding if he should say it or not. “you make me feel something else amor,” he says as he huffs a breath, almost laughing at himself.
“i dont even talk like this with girls.” he said.
you blinked, trying to process what he said.
what does that even mean?
but of course he answers you without even knowing.
“you ever heard me speak spanish with anybody but the boys?” he asks you, crossing his arms, momentarily removing his hands from your waist.
you try to think and when you do you really haven't heard him speak spanish with anyone but the boys. and even when it's with them it's like two words or less.
he nods like he knows your answer already and his voice dips as he keeps talking. “my mom used to be on my ass about that…”
he sighed, pausing for a second.
”shes always asking why i dont speak spanish with nobody outside of the house.” he said, looking off for a second. its small, and you almost don't notice it but there's a crack in his facade now.
“she was sad about it but i told her my native language is sacred and yet…” it was silent for a second, the only noise in the house being the soft sound of a car driving down the street every now and then.
he looks back at you, his jaw clenching as he pieces together something even he didn't realize.
”…and yet i been talking to you in spanish without even thinkin about it.” he said, almost as if he didn't mean to. he slipped and you can see the realization hit him in real time as he clears his throat and straightens up slightly. its too late now, you already saw.
connie almost regretted opening his mouth to begin with because now he’s said too much. he pauses for a second thinking about how he can get the conversation moving again.
“my moms really used to get on me for that… for not speaking spanish. i had to tell her i move like ain’t no girl worth keeping around.” he laughed, small and dry. you made a face at him but as he placed his hands back on your hips he said the last thing you expected to hear after what he just said.
”…you the first person that made me feel stupid for that.” he spoke gently. you can see the moment of weakness that he has, the moment of vulnerability he experiences as he looks away from you again trying to regain himself.
…he’s not joking.
he’s actually…
why does that feel… real.
you swallow, thanking the lord that people really cant read minds.
connie takes the last step in, finally closing the minuscule gap that was between the two of you as you brought your hands up to rest on his chest, allowing yourself to finally give in to the moment.
”i don't wanna guess with you.” his voice was steady now, almost grounded.
“i wanna know you for real.”
his thumb rubs your side again as you play with the fabric of his shirt, now too nervous to look at him.
connie isnt having that though. he lifts your chin with his finger looking you dead in your eyes as he says, “i dont wanna be another guy you talk about like ‘yeah he was cool while he lasted’,” that felt personal for him but he kept going because he wanted to get to his point.
“i wanna know you.” he said.
“like actually know you” he gestures between the two of you.
“what you like when nobody is watching,”
”what you eat when you're not trynna be cute,”
”what you listen to or watch when you cant sleep,"
”what makes you laugh for real, not that fake shit you be doin sometimes. yeah i seen it.” he said, and that gets a small laugh out of both of you.
but it fades as soon as it comes and you’re back to serious.
“…i wanna know you when its just you.” he said, refusing to break eye contact.
“not what people say you are. not what you show everybody else.” he says softer.
”you, y/n.” hearing your name roll off his tongue did something to you. it was different hearing it now. everything was different now after everything he just confessed to you.
you inhale slowly, trying to regain your composure after all of that.
“…you talk a lot,” your words were quiet and slightly shaky but you made sure to hide that part.
but your tone wasn't dismissive or annoyed like it’d usually be.
and connie notices immediately, of course he does, thinking he overwhelmed you or crossed a boundary, his grip leaves your hip first and he gives you space to breathe.
“yeah… but you still listen.”
then he turns and makes his way out of the kitchen like he didn’t just rearrange the entire relationship between you.
after that… absolutely nothing about him felt accidental anymore…
and the worst part? as scared as you are to go through with this…
you didn't want it to stop.
a/n: reblogs and feedback are appreciated! I hope you guys enjoy and it doesnt feel all over the place or anything !!
taglist: @sincerely-kaiii @sunset-euphoria