Drunk & Heartbroken Jas2k16
Once upon a time, I loved you. You were my sun, my moon and my ocean. My heart had leapt at any moment with you, whether alone or accompanied. My stomach turned in every way at the thought of your closeness. Nervous around you yet eager. With strange hands yet familiar to my touch. My fury had burned your face; my numbness asked for your grip at my throat. A firery passion built yet sincerity closed. I wanted to get closer just so I could melt into your hands. You kept me at bay letting me float along the waves. The keys to the kingdom of heaven grasped in your palm. Still under the wraps after all the damage. But loneliness and helplessness had drawn me to you. Someone who saw me. The flaws, incompleteness and faults I had didn't bother you. My weaknesses didn't scare you away. I had a soul who understood, listened and was interested. How could I not fall for you? A beautiful secret and exciting affair. I felt special; as if I was the only star in the entire galaxy. Sparkling bright as ever. Until you disappeared on me without so much as a whisper. Left alone with the wolves once again barley escaping their clutches. You appeared back from the grave. As if a guardian angel tried blessing me. My hurt not as severe with you letting go of the sadness my heart held onto. You kept me safe from the demons that haunt me. Holding me away from unwanted hands in forbidden places. Getting to close to the sun, ignoring the fate of the poor young foolish love. Feeling I was important. To only be tossed away like trash. Loneliness had called to the beast again. Becoming addicted once more, pushing the needle into my vein. Only to feel your hand pulling it out, despite the feeling going deeper into my flesh pushing the sweet nectar into my body. The awful euphoria, the yearning and hoping. It brought about the breaking of my chains. The feeling of the grass on my feet, the sun gleaming on my face. Believing it could be so much more. Tha maybe you looked into my eyes and found meaning. Feeling the deep sorrow of not sharing our love with one another. You wanted all my love and affection yet didn't want to give in return. I made sacrifices while you enjoyed my endeavors. Taking advantage of my feelings. Making me believe in my fantasy to come true. Yet there were no commitments. You still acting like a stray dog. Wandering, looking for what you already had in front of you. Yet I believed to be your moon, sun and ocean. Only to find out I was the dirt you stepped on; the mat you wiped your feet on. You had proclaimed your love but didn't mean it. Being familiar to others while with me. The tears burned my face, my anger ravenous. I had never felt so stupid. Nieve that you actually gave a damn. But I accepted you with all digressions. Soon after you plucked me from your garden. A Jasmine flower, sweet by smell and fragile with touch. Half dead yet clutching for life. A flower who was sucked into darkness for so long. Drenched, lifted all to avoid the ground cracking around me. Coping with the pain, easing my mind. Only to find it won't end. My hope dead. My trust withered. My love empty. Yes, once upon a time I loved you when you didn't love me. We could have been beautiful. But you sought others...now once upon a time has come to an end. Once you were my sun, moon and ocean. Now, I don't love you.
