ugh I wish we could see more of shane's relationship w jj and hayden bc its so damn imp to me
hayden obv befriends shane bc he's Not Like the Others. not in the hes obv neurodivergent sense but also in the 'metros locker room is a bigoted mess and hollander never part takes in any of that shit'. he's seen shane grimace at the way they talk about women sometimes and hayden decides this is it. if he's going to make a friend on this team its going to be hollander.
(also I think hayden wanted to approach him for a while bc he had a crush on him lol)
w jj thou its different. hes a black man and im assuming the only other poc on the montreal team. also bc hes a black man on a largely white team playing for white dominant racist sport, he keeps his opinions about the team's grossness to himself, like shane. he can't afford to offend them like that.
other thing about jj? him and shane are total opposites of each other. shane avoids the spotlight like its life or death but jj thrives under attention. he loves ppl he loves making friends he loves to talk he loves to party. by all means him and shane would have never been friends if he'd left him be. but jj cant do that. bc their shy, awkward captain is the only other poc on the team, a person who receives far too much attention for how little he likes, and as a result is on the receiving end of a lot more racism than jj is (from the media anyway).
and shane is sweet and kind and responds gently to anyone and jj cannot leave him alone. he has a lot of respect for him always referring him to captain, when ik many ppl must have questioned his captaincy based on his 'asian built' and poor social skills, but jj's always screaming captaine like no thats their team leader, the reason they're winning cups, the reason the team becomes the best in the league. he will not let anyone forget it.
hes always engaging shane when theyre w the team, but interacting with him outside is a challenge. shane does not like public spaces and theyre not close enough to call him over and jj doesnt even want to bc what is he supposed to do alone w this guy anyway. so instead he starts making notes of what kind of spaces shane is more comfortable in. he wont force him to go clubbing but oh theres a private party w no loud music or huge crowds and oh he needs shane to be here. its good for him to come outside and meet ppl and shane's one of the hottest guys hes ever seen but hes never seen w anyone and jj thinks its bc he has no life outside hockey (correct) and he makes it his job to let shane meet ppl. to make friends. shane found his best friend, his soulmate rose bc of jj.
and then shane comes out as gay. many of the guys are Not cool about it. the others will not say anything bc shane's a moc, hes autistic and now hes gay, and his captaincy is not whole heartedly accepted, not even w all the cups, and these guys would rather please the str8 white guys in the team than stand up for what's right. so jj makes it his fucking job to support shane as aggressively as possible. when he calls him, he shouts 'captaine' louder, he's more physically affectionate w shane so fuck homophobes, he'll casually talk about some hot guy he can introduce shane to bc srsly shane needs to go out and also fuck the homophobes. he rants about shane's every goal and assist, he talks about how smooth shane is on ice, he'll go on a tangent about how montreal is so great bc they have captain shane hollander in a way thats so obv a reminder and warning to the rest of the team. the team may not be happy about a gay man leading them, the locker room might be stiff w tension, but not a single person will ever dare to slander shane or make homophobic jokes.
shane falls in love a little w jj. he too knows theyre drastically different ppl, hes always seen the effort jj puts to socialize w him so he always responds in kind, but hes never put in effort. but now he starts letting jj in, asking him to hangout, asking him about his family, friends, his dates. and fucking hell why did he never talk to jj before, bc who else is going to understand a parent of color except this guy? who else can he make eye contact w when he gets a comment that 'cannot be racist' but obv is. who else can he sit w later and shit on the person making the comment without having to first explain himself (which he will never do bc he can never find the right words, but magically jj knows how to explain). they both quickly find just how badly they needed someone like the other on their side, in their inner circle and they're so in love w each.
the bros dont do heart-to-hearts so shane and jj will switch to french when they need to. doesnt matter if the other guys know the language they know their grip on french is choppy at best and they love being Those poc that use a different language in front of white ppl. its a white language but still. they share family recipes w each other, joke about their extended families, spend their festivals together w absolutely no fear of their traditions or irrational shame (a first time sharing that w a hockey player for both of them). its such a massive relief but also lets them connect to their traditions in a way they've never been allowed to before.
so yea jj feels fucking awful about finding out about ilya that way. its fucking worse that its thru hayden's fanmail bc that means hayden knew, that hayden was having dinners w shane's bf when he didnt even know. jj had thought he knew shane as well as he knew himself, and now he feels like he doesnt know shane at all bc why didnt shane feel comfortable enough to tell him this? did shane really think jj would resent him? or was this smth shane was ashamed of, so he couldnt tell.
I think thats why he allows himself to think shane tripped. bc shane throwing a game is as unlikely as the sun rising in the west but if thats why shane kept this a secret it would be easier for jj to swallow than the fact that he didnt feel safe enough w him. and bc secretly a wounded, angry part of jj knows this will kill shane but he wants shane to know what its like to have ur best friend doubt ur integrity. I think if they were alone he would be bitter for far longer, its only that he sees shane's face twist w pain and betrayal and he realizes they're not alone, that hes allowed this ass fucking team to doubt shane, to hurt shane at a time where shane needed his support most and jj's own rage and hurt disappears, replaced w guilt so fucking heavy he doesnt know how to face shane after this. bc how did he do that to his own fucking brother, how did he let him feel alone in this, how did he let anyone else take a jab at shane when only he is allowed this?
oh also hes just so fucking jealous hayden knew but he didnt like try being in a bff group of three ppl and then finding out two of them have been keeping a secret from u its fucking ugly.
