#john mastodon

[pynkbites]

Mastodon is having their very own Goncharov moment! Come, take a journey with me...

Gossip rag Mediaite recently reported on Elon Musk banning Mastodon's official Twitter account, @joinmastodon. Unfortunately, they somehow misread this as "John Mastodon" and assumed this completely fictional individual must be the founder of the decentralized Twitter alternative.

In truth, Mastodon was founded by German computer programmer Eugen Rochko... who himself was amused, if somewhat bewildered by the news.

Meanwhile, human creativity took root in this fertile new meme soil, and John Mastodon's lore began to grow...

His identity is still unstuck in place and time, but you can imagine John Mastodon as the cool anarchist techno-chad who swirlied loser nerd Elon Musk in high school. As for anything beyond that, well... you know what they say.

Nobody can be told who John Mastodon is. You have to be SHOWN.

And finally, my own small contribution to this ongoing lore-chaos:

While yet nascent, I do wonder how far Mastodon's Goncharov-alike will go...

[neil-gaiman]

There were three men came out of the West Three kings both great and high And they have sworn a solemn oath John Mastodon must die.

They took a tank and ran him down With bullets in his head And they have sworn a solemn oath John Mastodon was dead

But when the Spring came kindly on And showers began to fall John Mastodon got up again And did surprise them all...

[once-upon-a-reblog]

I know this is extremely niche and six people will understand but

[alackofcharacter]

My favorite little-known fact about John Mastodon is that he first broke into tech when a hiring manager at IBM who had attended an early test showing of Goncharov recognized him from his walk-on role as a gangster.

[grilledhamandcheesesandwich]

Fun fact: John Mastodon had a brief cameo in the 1973 mafia movie Goncharov.

[stevensavage]

Goncharov and John Mastodon

Thanks to a misprint at a news site, “Join Mastodon” became “John Mastodon” in a discussion of the Twitter Meltdown.

This has resulted in extensive discussions of the life of John Mastodon.

Including his connections to Goncharov.

It spreads.

[xenofact]

The truth about #JohnMastodon

[theabstruseone]

Well, that answers that question.

Description: Screenshot from Mastodon user  @[email protected] stating “Before he worked in tech, John Mastodon dreamed of being a movie director. He spent the summer before his senior year at Stamford working as a production assistant on the gangster epic Goncharov by Martin Scorsese. When Goncharov flopped at the box office, John decided to focus on learning COBOL and got his first tech job working on defense systems.”