#just king things

[charl0ttan]

having sex with my just king things wife when she asks if i wanna do some segments and the music plays and she starts talking about the ways my penis reminds her of being a cowboy in the desert

[eccentricpine]

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Cameron: I fundamentally do not care about the lives and interior operations of the American upper middle class. I simply do not.

Michael: Mh-hmm.

Cameron: I want to know about elfs. I want to know about dwarfs. I want to know about: wizards. I want to know about: goblins. I want to know about: cyberpunks. I want to know about: rampant AI. I want to know about: Master Chief. I want to know about: gay wizards. Okay? Like that's what I want to know about.

Michael: Of course.

Cameron: And that shit does not appear in the papers of record when it comes to short stories.

[clementine-kesh]

“stranger things isn’t so much a bad stephen king pastiche as it is a stephen king bad pastiche” is such an eloquent bit of description you’d think it was from critically acclaimed podcast just king things but it’s actually from a tumblr post i can’t find right now

[cutthroatchorus]

Save me Just King Things

[guccigarantine]

“it’s kind of inscrutable that anyone would write this book and more than that that anyone would publish it” is the stephen king promise

[k-stands-4-kruel]

MONEY SPREAD!!!!!!! KAHAHAHHAA

[dinosaurgiantpenny]

Uncle Stevie gets it.

[laminatednewspaper]

You know those huge flasks that say “cheaper than therapy!” On them? I wish there was some way for the general populace to know that subscribing to the ranged touch patreon at ten dollars a month is my preferred method of drowning my sorrows. By listening to two middle aged men talk about Steven King movies so I don’t have to think about my life problems