Please expect the menu to be subject to change as we add more items and further expand and categorize them. It is our job to make things as convenient and enjoyable for you all. If you see something missing or want to make a suggestion, please refer to our request box.
Thank you,
✎ Kryptid
Quick drinks to satiate that fix, small but rich pastries, sides that leave you feeling satisfied, and warm meals with several courses to keep you full, we have it all and in so many flavors, some for more mature customers. And if we don't? Check out our customer service policy* and pop by the request box when we're open ;)
*Other fandoms and characters can be found on our Customer Service Policy page.
☕︎ = Staff Picks
✎﹏Call of Duty
König
Take On Me (König/GN!Reader)
Fight or not, you're pretty sure you could take him on.
Logan Walker
☕︎ Shatter (Logan Walker/GN!Reader)(Drabble)
Multi-Character
Headcanons & Spitballs
☕︎ When you call them 'babygirl' (TF141 + König/GN!Reader)
☕︎ When they call you 'babygirl (TF141 + König/GN!Reader)
TF141 w/a hypersexual partner (GN!Reader)
COD:MWII boys w/a curly-haired partner (TF141 + König/GN!Reader)
COD:MW boys w/an autistic partner (TF141 + KorTac + Los Vaqueros/GN!Reader)
TF141 Monster/Hybrid AU
Oneshots
Fight Song (April Fools 2023)
☕︎ Me and the Devil (Platonic)(141/Reader)(Oneshot)
You can see it. The devil. It laughs, and laughs, and laughs, mocks you for your childish stupidity and naivete. To think the angels would come marching in, that you'd make it out with any semblance of sanity. You can't fight it, you can't even hide from it.
All you can do is lie in your grave.
Multi-Part/Series
☕︎ Everything I Wanted (Platonic)(141/Los Vaqueros/Reader): Part 1, Part 2
Kicking, punching, cutting, all sorts of torture you were prepared for. But drugs? That was a whole new level of crazy you didn't sign up for, and lord knows the 141 wasn't going to stand for it.
No one will.
✎﹏Slashers/Dead By Daylight
Harry Warden/The Miner
Happy Super Late Valentines (GN!Reader)(Drabble)
You had a shitty Valentine's day, and Harry comes to pick up the leftovers.
Multi-Character
Headcanons & Spitballs
Slashers comforting their partner after a nightmare (GN!Reader)
DBD killers w/a partner who wants to take it slow (GN! Reader)
Remember, you can always ask for a custom item in our request box when it's open! If you're not sure what we offer or want to know what you can and can't order, refer to our Customer Service Policy, aka the Rules!
fic requests: closed ✧ spitball: open ✧ asks: open ✧ dms: open
❧ The Menu (masterlist)
✎ peruse our fine selection of drinks, pastries, and meals, sure to satisfy customers of various tastes! our barista's specialty is gender-neutral, masc, and dominant readers, but we provide for numerous others.
❧ Customer Service Policy (rules)
✎ not sure what to get? worried what you can ask for? need a list of what we offer? consider reviewing our policy before requesting a specific item. we have various guidelines for specialized and custom orders.
❧ About Our Staff
✎ fun fact: our cafe is run by one person! we ask that you keep that in mind when waiting to be served. in the meanwhile, you can learn how to interact and all (not really) about our dear founder, CEO, CFO, manager, barista, chef, server, marketer, designer, coffee specialist, mixologist, teaologist, taste tester, manufacturer, technician, janitor—
❧ Recent Orders:
Lipstick Trend w/COD:MW Men 141 + König + Alejandro / GN! Reader
TF141 Monster/Hybrid AU Ideas
Shatter Logan Walker / GN!Reader
❧ Editing:
N/A
❧ Writing:
Words to the Wind Simon "Ghost" Riley / GN!Reader
Stalker's Tango DBD!Ghostface / GN!Reader
COD:MW Men when you're being creeped on 141 + Others / GN!Reader
❧ Other Location(s) (links)
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
As much as we love our beloved customers, this cafe is a one-man crew and to make sure the place doesn't burn down and ruin things for everyone, we have our own rules and regulations regarding special orders along with some guidance for the lost.
Many thanks,
✎ Kryptid
❧ Before You Order:
I will do a max of 10 characters for headcanons or fics per request, but you may request more in another one. Depending on the request, I might take out characters or make a second part.
I specialize in masc, amab, dominant, and particularly gender neutral readers, but I'm open to all types.
Readers are automatically written gender-neutral unless requested otherwise.
I do character/reader and occasionally character/character fanfics.
Poly ships are more than welcome! Please state if it is poly, because I will assume you want them all separately.
I will not always accept requests. I write on my own schedule.
If you want a specific kind of reader, please directly state so, such as gender, assigned sex, and/or pronouns. For example,
May I have a transmasc reader with König?
Can I get Din Djarin smut with an amab reader with they/them pronouns?
Can you do Ghost x fem!reader?
I would love to request a könig/horangi/masc reader please!
Remember, it's better to be super specific than super vague for the best customer satisfaction.
✅️Will Write✅️
Polyamory/Open Relationships
Smut (certain kinks and within reason)
Mild Dub-con (depends heavily on request)
Platonic Relationships
Sibling/Related Readers
Child/Younger Reader
AUs
Comfort/Trauma Fics
Readers of all genders, backgrounds, etc
Dark/Psychological Fics (within reason)
Dead Dove (depending)
Half-Humans/Humanoids
Robots/Mechs
Light A/B/O
❌️Won't Write❌️
Explicit or Graphic Non-con/R*pe Smut
Dark/Psychological fics glorifying actions
B*astiality
P*dophilia
Inc*st
Certain Fetishes
Real People
Pregnancy
A/B/O Mpreg
❧ Flavors:
✎﹏Call of Duty
Simon "Ghost" Riley ('09 & '22)
John "Soap" MacTavish ('09 & '22)
Captain John Price ('09 & '22)
Kyle "Gaz" Garrick ('22)
König
Stray/Hound ('09 & '22)
Kim "Horangi" Hong-Jin
Gary "Roach" Sanderson
Farah Karim
Alex Keller
Alejandro Vargas
Rodolfo Parra
Sebastian Krueger
Nikto
Sobieslaw "Gromsko" Kościuszko
Keegan P. Russ
Logan Walker
David "Hesh" Walker
✎﹏Slashers/Dead By Daylight
Ghostface (films)
Danny Johnson/Jed Olsen/DBD!Ghostface
Jason Voorhees
Harry Warden
Michael Myers (films, DBD)
Pyramid Head (games, DBD)
Bubba Sawyer (films, DBD)
Thomas Hewitt
Brahms Heelshire
Trapper/Evan MacMillan
Anna/Huntress
Wraith/Philip Ojomo
Legion/Frank Morrison
Ji-Woon Hak/Trickster
Sally Smithson/Nurse
✎﹏Star Wars
Poe Dameron
The Mandalorian/Din Djarin
Cassian Andor
Obi-Wan Kenobi
Stormtroopers
✎﹏Marvel
Sam Wilson/Captain America/Falcon
Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier
T'Challa/Black Panther
Peter Quill/Star-Lord
Gamora
Mantis
Nebula
Steven Grant/Marc Spector/Jake Lockley/Moon Knight
A/N: So I underestimated how many requests I got left over, more specifically underestimated how GOOD some of these prompts are. I've got a dozen more waiting in my box, not including the ones below, so unfortunately, my requests will be closed for quite some time but I'm hoping to post batches at a time </3
Beta Reading
COD:MWII men w/an autistic reader (request, headcanons)
Editing/Finishing
Hound/Reader (oneshot, fluff)
Slasher/Reader Hide n Seek (request, scenario/headcanons)
✎﹏Just a local cryptid writing for fun (and spite), I started this account just to lurk on Tumblr and save my favorite fics. Initially, I started writing as a joke with my "When you call them 'babygirl'" headcanons. But then I got really salty about reader culture, especially in COD fanfic, so now I try my best to write as neutrally as possible and for readers who just wanna get represented a little more. Tall, buff, chubby, masc, neurodivergent, POC, people who just want to be absolute powerhouses, people who just want family dynamics, people who want to explore darker themes without glorifying them, etc. Variety is a huge thing for me.
Oh yeah, this account is actually supposed to be kept quiet from people who follow me for my art on TikTok, Twitter, and Instagram. It's not supposed to be secret, but it's not supposed to be super public. Yet. I guess.
❧ Fun Facts:
I've played all of the CoD Modern Warfare games and I can guarantee, I'm very mid at online multi-player, but the campaigns slap :')
I started taking drawing and writing seriously in like... 2016, so it's been 7+ years.
Used to rp online a lot for about 5-6 years, but now I get really nervous haha... I might try again.
CoD faves are: Ghost, Soap, König, Roach, Gaz, Horangi, Farah, and Krueger in no particular order. And no, I will not pick.
Slasher/DBD faves include: Pyramid Head and Ghostface. Simple 'n basic.
Star Wars faves are: Poe Dameron, Din Djarin, Ahsoka Tano, BB-8, R2D2, Leia Organa, Boba Fett
Marvel faves: Peter Quill, Rocket Raccoon, Peter Parker, Gamora, Nebula, Mantis, Miles Morales, Deadpool, Daredevil
Slenderverse faves: Hoodie, Masky, Splendorman
❧ Interests
Hobbies:
Drawing
Writing
Animating
Video Editing
Reading
Gaming
Active Fandoms:
Call of Duty
Marvel
Slashers/Dead By Daylight
Marble Hornets/Slenderverse
ARGs (Mandela Catalogue, Vita Carnis, Backrooms, Gemini Home Entertainment, Channel 58, Walten Files, etc)
Anime (mainly Demon Slayer and Chainsaw Man)
SCP Foundation
Etc.
❧ Before You Interact:
I'm cool with people sharing their thoughts, ideas, headcanons, even ocs with me!
I'm best at gender neutral, masc, and dom readers, stuff like that
I post on my own schedule, and I pick whatever I feel like writing
Don't just dm me saying "hi" and nothing else, because it doesn't really... give me much to respond to.
DNI if you support p*dophila, b*stiality, r*pe, inc*st, homophobia, transphobia, or if you're an asshole in general.
DNI if you're younger than 16. My content is on the mature side.
