Can't stop thinking about that video on YouTube where the girl 'calls' her alters. It's like... Helloooooo, if we could call our fucking alters does that not completely defeat the object of DID being an 'illness' because surely if we can call them, we can get rid of them, too. I don't choose Sid or Steve of Dave or Flo or Hope or Poppy or any of the other 'alters' that take over my fucking life. Neither can I 'call' them, to come. I just try to live as normal a life as possible and when Flo appears or Hope or Dave or any of the other fuckers, I gotta go with it. No I'm not me, yes it is scary, but I don't realise it's fucking happening, that's what people don't understand. Once I'm back then I sort of have some idea, but I have no recollection of about 50% of the stuff that has happened. So I'm sorry for not being me, 90% of the time, but seriously... If I had it my way, I wouldn't be like this.