First, Last but not Always
I was not able to say this personally since I did not have the chance. I'm sorry for not telling the truth. I'm sorry for hiding everything. I always thought of you as my friend. Someone I can turn to. Someone reliable. Someone I can depend on. Someone special and dear to me. I don't get angry of you. I did not recall getting mad at you because I always blame myself when something bad happens. Even though you made a fool out of me, I'm the one who always say sorry. Even though you're just taking advantage of the situation, I'm the one who'll thank first. It's not about who gives and who's first but I'm getting tired. Honestly, do you really think of me as a friend? It's against my will to be used by you. But I thought if that was a way to spend more with you, then I will. I did not expect that the decision will only hurt me more. I love you so much but the thing I want the most of you is your honesty. I realized that this relationship is one-sided. I always trust your words but your words were different from your actions. I just wish you tell me to stop. I didn't want to talk to you because I'm worried you'll hate me more. I didn't want to bother you because I also value your time. Just let me greet you Happy Holidays. I'm sure we already exchanged greetings but this might be the last one for now.