mixed feelings
on one hand, i really miss like 3 or 4 people from london and i am pretty excited to go home for the holidays and see them. i am looking forward to catching up with my brother, my parents, my grandma, my friends. i really am. being "home" will be nice.
on the other... meh. i've moved around enough at this point that home is more of a concept than a place for me. it's a place within myself and is defined by me and the people i choose to surround myself with. i am not a huge fan of this town, but i must say i really feel at home here at his point in my life. my roommates are amazing, i have a solid group of friends and i really feel like i am finally happy in a real way. i eat far better and healthier here than i ever have with my parents. i feel more... myself here. more like i can be who i truly am without the chains of people's expectations of my former self holding me back. i am wondering how beneficial or detrimental it will be to my personal growth to be returning to the cocoon.
plus, there are like 7 bongs, a kitten, some rad people, my guitars and a stripper pole here. HOW CAN I LEAVE THIS PLACE?! i'm going to miss my new little family and my awesome house and my rad life.
oh well. it's a good thing really. it just means this: i am really happy being who i am where i am right now.
i appreciate you all more than you will ever know.