Would you believe me if I said that engaging in link-click Tumblr and Twitter discourse has actually benefited me in real life? Before, I couldn't confidently defend my propositions; I had a constant 'argument block' and was easily bewildered. Now, I know that people can talk non-stop bullshit using such extravagant jargon that it's technically impossible for a normal person to follow. There are people with very few citations whose analyses resonate with me. Academia is much like fandom culture, and I thank all my moots; if it hadn't been for your blessings, I could not have presented or published papers at conferences or in journals.
Summary: Some people watch movies when they’re sick; Lu Guang prefers to watch memories of his favourite moments.
Rating: Teen and Up
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
“Go, work, I’ll be fine.” Lu Guang’s squeaked.
“Do you have enough tea?” Cheng Xiaoshi lifted the thermos on the table by the couch that Lu Guang was currently taking residence upon.
Eyeing the bottle, Lu Guang nodded, inciting another round of coughs.
“Did you take your cough medicine yet?” Cheng Xiaoshi grabbed the bottle, hovering it beside Lu Guang just in case.
“Yes,” Lu Guang responded nasally. “I’m fine - go work so we don’t go broke.”
“Text me if you need anything.” Cheng Xiaoshi pointed at Lu Guang’s phone (which Cheng Xiaoshi made sure was plugged in).
“I’m fine.” Lu Guang smiled, pushing at Cheng Xiaoshi’s leg.
“Fine, I’ll go, I’ll go!” Cheng Xiaoshi threw his hands in the air, pretending to be offended. “Oh - first!”
“Nooo leave me alone!” Lu Guang rasped, but ended with a chuckle as Cheng Xiaoshi bolted full speed towards him.
“I love you.” Cheng Xiaoshi peppered Lu Guang’s face with kisses.
“CHENG XIAOSHI! WHERE ARE YOU?” Qiao Ling yelled from the bottom of the stairs.
With one final kiss, Cheng Xiaoshi raced downstairs.
Even the amused chuckle was sore against Lu Guang’s throat. Thankfully, his boyfriend had stuffed at least three pots of tea into an oversized thermos for him.
There was a bottle of honey on the table, but his teacup was already prepared with a thin layer on the bottom. Smirking, Lu Guang poured the tea into his cup. Cheng Xiaoshi always went above and beyond whenever Lu Guang was sick, it was really adorably obscene.
Sipping on his tea, he waited for the sounds of casual conversation to fall into full swing. Whenever he was sick, he always had a routine. Most of them were all compiled by Cheng Xiaoshi, such as: wear a special pair of jammies, get bundled up on the couch in a soft blanket, take medicine, drink soup, and drink tea. The only part of his list that Cheng Xiaoshi didn’t have an active part in was a secret, a guilty pleasure that Lu Guang hid away from him.
Some people enjoy watching tv when they’re sick, Lu Guang enjoys revisiting some of his favorite memories.
Satisfied with the depth of conversation below, Lu Guang rested his hand on the floor as his head peered under the couch, looking for the missing board. The dark blue edge of the cover stuck out from its hiding place. Smirking, Lu pulled the book out from under the couch.
Lu Guang knew he didn’t get sick often, the layer of dust on his book was empirical proof. Taking one of the tissues, Lu Guang carefully wiped it off (trying his best to avoid a coughing fit).
The book itself was nothing special, hence why Lu Guang carried no qualms in cutting out the center of half the pages. Though he’s certain Cheng Xiaoshi would adore knowing this was a part of Lu Guang’s routine, the secret made it slightly more tantalizing. As well as the fact that Cheng Xiaoshi has little control to not dive into a photo when he sees a good memory, and these were his favorites.
Adjusting in his seat, Lu Guang flipped through pictures, deciding which one to start with.
-
“Why are you taking a picture of me?” Lu Guang leaned over the counter, pulling up his bangs straight.
“Because you look so cute when you’re trying to concentrate!” Cheng Xiaoshi snorted, sliding his phone back into his pocket.
“Shut up.” Lu Guang dabbed the brush into the dye bowl.
“Ugh, that stuff reeks.” Cheng Xiaoshi pinched his nose at the sharp scent of ammonia.
“You don’t have to be here for this, you know?” Lu Guang sighed, tapping the brush against the edge of the bowl.
“Can I help?” Cheng Xiaoshi bent over, needing to get a closer view of the pale blue concoction.
“You want to bleach my hair?” Lu Guang watched Cheng Xiaoshi’s reflection in the mirror. The huge smile that spread across his face was mildly concerning.
“Can I?”
“… can you?” Lu Guang lifted a brow towards him.
“Let me try, what’s the worst that can happen?”
“I’m going to be very upset if I end up bald.”
“What? Hair dye can do that?” Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes boggled at the threatening cream.
Swishing the idea around in his head, Lu Guang decided to give in. Setting the brush back in its bowl, Lu Guang pinched the gloves off his hands and passed them to Cheng Xiaoshi.
Nervous exhilaration pulsed through Cheng Xiaoshi’s veins as he accepted the gloves. “Sit on the bath mat.” Cheng Xiaoshi instructed as he sat on top of the toilet.
Exhaling, Lu Guang slowly followed directions.
“What? You don’t trust me?” Cheng Xiaoshi chided, knowing full well that, at this moment, Lu Guang did not, in fact, trust him.
“Just get on with it.” Lu Guang crossed his legs on the floor in between Cheng Xiaoshi’s feet.
As a viewer, there were several aspects of Cheng Xiaoshi’s emotions that Lu Guang adored. Easter eggs of moments he never fully appreciated until looking back. Such as Cheng Xiaoshi’s nervous energy as he sectioned out Lu Guang’s hair. So nervous, in fact, that he kept swiping away sweat from his brow. But Cheng Xiaoshi was determined to prove his worth, because he wanted Lu Guang to ask him to do it next time.
“Okay, now what?” Cheng Xiaoshi tapped the thick layer of mud textured hair with his glove.
“Now put on the shower cap.” Lu Guang pointed to the box.
“A shower cap? Oh I’m going to have to get a picture of that.” Cheng Xiaoshi joked as he snapped the cap over Lu Guang’s head.
“The day you do that is the day you die.” The lack of inflection in Lu Guang’s statement warned Cheng Xiaoshi from testing that theory.
“Fine, what now?” Cheng Xiaoshi poked at the cap.
“Now we set a timer and wait.” Lu Guang opened up his phone, starting the countdown.
“What do you want to do while we wait?” The heels of Cheng Xiaoshi’s feet bounced along the floor.
Another interesting aspect, seeing through Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes, was understanding him on a different level. Comprehending that it was all but physically impossible for him to stay still. That his mind and body were always running a million miles a minute.
“I like to read a book.” Lu Guang rolled his chin along his chest.
“Boring.” Cheng Xiaoshi retorted, poking at the nape of Lu Guang’s neck.
“Hey! Take the gloves off!”
“Oh shit, sorry!” Cheng Xiaoshi turned the gloves inside out and tossed them into the trash can.
“Why don’t you start prepping dinner and I’ll clean this stuff up?” Lu Guang proposed.
Agreeing, Cheng Xiaoshi fled to the kitchen, putting together the ingredients for their noodles.
…
“Is dinner ready yet?” Qiao Ling pranced into the kitchen.
“Who said you were invited?” Cheng Xiaoshi chided, his attention still on the wok before him.
“But it just smells so good Cheng Xiaoshi!” Qiao Ling responded, setting the table for three.
“It does smell good.” Lu Guang wrapped his arms around Cheng Xiaoshi’s waist, his damp hair tickling the back of Cheng Xiaoshi’s neck and shoulders.
“Fine, fine, go sit your ass down.”
Chuckling, Lu Guang made his way to the table with Qiao Ling. Cheng Xiaoshi didn’t listen particularly close to their conversation, but he noticed when they abruptly stopped talking. They both stared at him with their mouths slightly agape.
“What? You haven’t even tried it yet.” Cheng Xiaoshi started portioning out the bowls as Qiao Ling burst into a hysterical laughter. “What?”
Not receiving an answer, Cheng Xiaoshi returned to the kitchen, leaving the wok on the stove to cool off. When he turned around again he noticed that not only had Qiao Ling nearly fell out of her chair, but Lu Guang’s face was red from holding in a laugh.
“WHAT?” Cheng Xiaoshi’s chest started to laugh along with them, still unsure as to why.
Unable to hold it in, Lu Guang let out a low rumble of a laugh, dropping his head to the table.
“You - haha - you guys are so - so cute!” Qiao Ling forced between laughs.
Was it because of the hug Lu Guang had given him while he was cooking? That was pretty normal in the upstairs realm, wasn’t it?
After half a minute passed, Qiao Ling wiped away her tears of joy. “So, you helped Lu Guang bleach his hair hey?”
“Huh? How did you know?” Cheng Xiaoshi scrunched his face, looking back and forth between the pair.
“I think - it’s a good - look,” Lu Guang stifled a laugh between words, holding his hand over his lips.
Dread hitting him like a freight train, Cheng Xiaoshi ran towards the bathroom. Steam filled the window with an old message of ‘I love you’ printed on the mirror. Huffing, Cheng Xiaoshi wiped the mirror clean.
“NOOO!” He shouted, the front of his hair speckled in different shades of yellow and white. “I LOOK LIKE A CHEETAH!”
In the kitchen, the chair scraped against the hardwood as Qiao Ling fell to the floor laughing.
-
Snickering, Lu Guang set the photo down and sipped at his tea. No one had given Cheng Xiaoshi the idea to color the bleached parts black for over a week. He thought he’d be stuck with it until it grew out.
Pouring himself another cup of tea, Lu Guang started looking into the next photo.
-
Determined, Cheng Xiaoshi scraped the furniture across the floor. Normally, Lu Guang would use the excuse of their ‘Landlady’ being upset about damages; but, since Qiao Ling was shoving the table, he lost his last excuse.
“I’ll just watch.” Lu Guang sighed, sitting on the relocated chair. Ever since Cheng Xiaoshi had discovered Tik Tok, he’d obsessed over learning countless dances.
With a mischevious smirk, Qiao Ling blasted the radio. A familiar female voice blasted through the speakers.
Fiddling his fingers, Lu Guang attempted to hide the twitch of his eyebrow. She’d caught him bopping around while listening to this song, his ear buds slightly too loud. She knew his weakness.
“Come on, Lu Guang, it’s easy!” Cheng Xiaoshi started trying out the new dance move, starting with his hands in the air down to his hips.
Chuckling, Lu Guang watched the flick of Cheng Xiaoshi’s hips. How he moved with such ease was mesmerizing.
“You’re doing it wrong!” Qiao Ling readjusted his hands slightly as they moved, quickly falling into a synchronized pair.
Each beat they hit together, the bigger Cheng Xiaoshi’s grin grew.
“You two look ridiculous.” Lu Guang announced with a flat voice and a giant smirk.
“You’re just jealous!” Cheng Xiaoshi added a few extra ‘pops’ in Lu Guang’s direction.
“Lu Guang, look, start with your arms up here.” Qiao Ling started directing him, even though he was still sitting on the chair.
Leering at her, Lu Guang allowed her to treat him as a marionette.
“Get his hips, Cheng Xiaoshi!” Qiao Ling giggled, moving his hands in a roller motion.
Obeying, Cheng Xiaoshi slid on his knees towards the chair. Gripping his fingers through a belt loop on either hip, he poorly manoeuvred Lu Guang to the beat of the song.
It was difficult to maintain a straight face as his best friends fervently attempted to puppet him into a dance.
“See?” Qiao Ling held her hands out, ending her demonstration of the dance move.
Rolling his eyes, Lu Guang slapped his palms on either arm of the chair. “Alright, start the song over.”
Still with his knees on the ground, Cheng Xiaoshi drummed against the floor in elation.
“You’re like a dog wagging his tail.” Lu Guang snorted, pushing himself off the chair.
Lu Guang did not have anywhere near the same coordination as either of them. His long lanky limbs moved off beat and flung much more than intended.
“Here, watch my hips.” Qiao Ling focused on flicking her hips.
Awkwardly, Lu Guang replicated the snapping of her body to the sounds of Cheng Xiaoshi roaring laughter.
After at least half an hour, they finally set up the camera. Still nervous to miss a beat, Lu Guang eyed the other two as his body repeated the new sequence he’d learned.
“Got it!” Qiao Ling hopped in excitement, running over to double check the footage.
Had anyone told Lu Guang this is where he’d be now, he wouldn’t have believed them. Dancing, of course, was something he’d never imagined himself doing. Dancing under the stars, in a warm room, with a family who loved him, seemed like an ever greater myth. A sense of safety and warmth flowed through Lu Guang’s veins. He had to wait longer than most, but he finally found his home.
“Watcha thinking about?” Cheng Xiaoshi nuzzled his nose into Lu Guang’s cheek.
“How absurd that video is.” Lu Guang playfully lied.
“You love it.” Cheng Xiaoshi snickered, pecking at Lu Guang’s face.
“Ewwwwwww!” Qiao Ling feigned disgust. “Stop reminding me how single I am!”
Lu Guang felt Cheng Xiaoshi’s silent laugh as warm breaths against his skin. “Get better, my love.” Cheng Xiaoshi planted a wet kiss on Lu Guang’s jaw.
Before Lu Guang could question Cheng Xiaoshi’s declaration, Cheng Xiaoshi was already pushing off, joining Qiao Ling with the video review.
-
Lu Guang pinched the photo away from himself as he let out a cough. The dry air ripped at his swollen skin. Regaining composure, he studied the photo again.
He’d taken a photo of Cheng Xiaoshi taking a photo of him. They both had their Polaroids out and Cheng Xiaoshi thought it would be cute.
Very suspicious…. Lu Guang shook the photo. He was nearly certain that Cheng Xiaoshi had not originally whispered anything in his ear that night.
Returning the photos to their hiding place, Lu Guang surrendered to sleep. He’d save more photos for later.
-
Once he could properly breath again, Lu Guang set his photo book on the table, waiting for Cheng Xiaoshi to come in. Sitting with his forearms against his knees, he waited to ambush Cheng Xiaoshi.
Distracted, Cheng Xiaoshi stumbled into the room, still finishing whatever was in his mouth.
“Oh, Lu Guang? Are you feeling better?” Cheng Xiaoshi mouthed around his food.
“Recognize this book?” Lu Guang tapped at his ‘secret illness photo box’.
“Aweh!” Cheng Xiaoshi’s shoulders slumped. “Which picture finally gave it away?”
“What?” Lu Guang’s voice fell out before he could stop it. There were over twenty pictures in this box. How many had Cheng Xiaoshi played in?
“Oh, I mean, you found that one.” Cheng Xiaoshi attempted to paint an innocent face over his curling smirk.
“Cheng Xiaoshi…” Lu Guang dropped his face in his hands. What could he even say? It wasn’t as if he was truly mad. Part of him was mildly embarrassed that he’d truly thought he’d kept his box of sentimentally a secret this whole time. But knowing how much effort Cheng Xiaoshi would have needed to go through to cross reference photos to jump in the days he had was nauseatingly adorable.
Cold hands rubbed against Lu Guang’s forehead.
“You still feel a bit hot.” Concerned golden eyes scanned over him. “Lay back down, I’ll make you another tea.” Cheng Xiaoshi grabbed the empty thermos off the ground.
Sniffling, Lu Guang reached for the tissue box. Maybe Cheng Xiaoshi was right, he still wasn’t quite ready for confrontation or coherent thought yet. Throwing the soiled tissue in the bin beside the couch, Lu Guang re-wrapped himself in the blanket. He wasn’t sure how, but nearly everything soft and comforting in their house smelt like Cheng Xiaoshi. Maybe it was a psychological reaction to associate comfort with Cheng Xiaoshi.
Setting down the tea, Cheng Xiaoshi cracked open the jar of vapo rub. Fingering out a glob, he motioned at Lu Guang to unbutton his pajama shirt.
Lu Guang hissed as the cold goo reached his chest, inciting another round of raspy coughs.
Undeterred, Cheng Xiaoshi rubbed in the rest of the medicine. Sticking his finger in the jar again, he dabbed a small amount under Lu Guang’s nostrils. Lu Guang’s eyes shut at his touch, a slight moan released at the soothing of his broken skin.
“You know…” Cheng Xiaoshi trailed as he closed the jar and wiped his fingers. “I have a few photos of cherished memories… I can give you some duplicates… if you’d like…”
Nodding, Lu Guang squirmed around the couch to place his head on Cheng Xiaoshi’s lap. Out of breath from the slight movement, Lu Guang’s voice rasped. “I’d like that.”
Sinking into the couch, Cheng Xiaoshi adjusted to make it as easy as possible for Lu Guang to cuddle into him.
“No jumping - though.” Lu Guang coughed out the shortened sentence.
“Of course not.” The tips of Cheng Xiaoshi’s fingers rolled Lu Guang’s bangs from his face. Switching to a whisper, he added “Can’t do it twice.”
Drained, Lu Guang responded with a disapproving grunt before his body went limp against Cheng Xiaoshi.
“I’ll put my favourite memories in for next time.” Cheng Xiaoshi bent in half to kiss Lu Guang’s sweat beaded hair. “I love you… sleep well…”
Satisfied as Lu Guang’s breaths turned to snores, Cheng Xiaoshi pulled out his video game console. He’d stay with Lu Guang on the couch for as long as he’d let him.
Author’s note:
I originally wanted to write more memories, but unfortunately time constraints took me down 😭
Also, the song they danced to was from the chibi/day in the life series. The dance move I was attempting to describe:
