#lonely!merlin

[merlinficlibrary]

Intension by Ryne

Title: Intension

Author: Ryne

Pairing/Character Focus: Gen

Rating: General Audiences

Word Count: 2,486

Author’s Summary: "Sometimes I feel the weight of my destiny crushing me." And never more so than after talking to the druids, who may understand about his magic, but still do not understand Merlin any more than the rest of the world.

My thoughts behind the cut...

My Comments: This fic explores the angsty side of destiny as well as Merlin’s relationship with the druids.  I always wished he would have more interactions with them on-screen, and this fic gives us the chance to see the author’s take on what that might look like.

I think Merlin, as a character, generally shows a lot of resilience and a strong capability to handle whatever destiny throws at him rather than succumb to the weight of it, but on the other hand, there is no one he can go to about how hard it is who truly understands, and so we never get to see him succumb.  This fic was an interesting take on how Merlin is different even from those with magic, and how he is kind of doomed to be lonely/different from everyone whether he’s amongst druids or non-magical people of Camelot - and it does show him succumb to that weight a little bit.

Personally, I like to read fics that explore that loneliness and then show how he moves past it and connects with Arthur and the knights after a magic reveal and gets to be who he is and is loved and accepted by everyone, but that happy ending doesn’t come without the angst of him being isolated first.  This fic explores a different side of that isolation, and even though there isn’t that nice happy resolution I love to read, it’s still an interesting fic worth reading.

Also - I love fics with druids.  Just saying.

Go read Intension on AO3

[merlinficlibrary]

When the Nights are too Quiet by mollrach13

Title: When the Nights are too Quiet

Author: mollrach13

Pairing/Character Focus: gen, Merlin character study

Rating: General Audiences

Word Count: 1,231

Author’s Summary: 'It was times like this that he missed people the most; Balinor, Will, Lancelot... Freya. And he hated it because his loneliness tainted his grief for them - He missed the idea of them more than the people themselves'

My thoughts behind the cut...

My Comments: This is one of my absolute favorite fics.  It’s short, but it’s packed to the brim with emotional intelligence.  It’s such a real and vivid description of what it’s like to be lonely.  I think in the later seasons of Merlin, it’s really clear how much keeping his secret keeps him apart from others, and how much others’ lives move on in directions that don’t include him because he cannot include them in his.  I think that’s part of what draws me to Merlin (both the show and the character) - it’s such a parallel to the experience of growing up queer that it’s a really relatable feeling to me.

I think this author does a breathtakingly beautiful job of describing that feeling.  This fic is beautiful even though it’s short, and it makes me want to just give Merlin the hug he needs and deserves.  I can’t recommend this fic enough.  I honestly don’t even bother reading fics this short most of the time, but I’m SO glad I made an exception for this one.  It’s such a gem.

Go read When the Nights are too Quiet on AO3