The man you meet at 19
Everyone says beware of the man you meet at 19 like it's some scary ghost story. BEWARE!!! once you turn 19 a man will come into your life and ruin it until your heart is broken and you DISAPPEAR (in a scary campfire voice). That's how I heard people when they said that. You're ridiculous is what I thought every time I heard it. Then like clockwork in January I turned 19 and by February 17th here came the man sent to destroy me. The first 3 months were magical filled will all the love bombing you could think of, all the lies a man could tell, and the obsessiveness a girl like me found charming and adorable. Oh, this dude had every single trick in the book lined up for me. That's all it was though. Tricks. He loved the fact I didn't know him so he could pretend to be the fake persona he wished he was. (side note: for every girl wondering why he moved on so fast, how could he find another, what does she have that you don't.. the only thing she has is the fact she doesn't know him. She doesn't know that he's a lying, cheating, manipulative, bastard and he adores the fact that he doesn't have to look at her and confront how his actions mess up a person, this way he can avoid holding himself accountable and keep pretending to be a good person.) Anyway, those 3 months turned into about 7. From February to August I was stuck on this boy, this cat-and-mouse game. No matter how many times I found out he was talking to other girls, lying to me, and acting like I was replaceable, I found myself stuck and a part of me enjoying the game, learning the game. The funny thing is I never really liked him. Not fully. it was pure lust if you got anything from my first post. I do secretly wish and wait for him to come back. Because I am a quick learner. and I believe in me being my own karma. So when he decides to come back, which they always do. I'll have my 3 months of love bombing and the rest of full-on emotional torture. Because being the bigger person was never really my style.
