I hold my breaths. Will never blink
again
Pluck sighs with timid fingers
Hoard darkness from all the holes
in socks, in hearts, in roofs
Arrange letters into silent mornings,
cutting deep into starved flesh
and pouring
blood, dripping
coffee into poems
others wrote,
from me to you
Swallow suns, throbbing over remote lands,
unlived lives made brighter,
not forgiving
Hum songs off-key and on repeat
like mantras, like wicked spells
whispered to knot
my insides into drops of fire
into winds
Count smiles and half smiles
and belly laughs
and tears
I wanted to wipe
and ghosts
I wanted to chase away
Write memories out loud
on window sills too low to fall
(but when did that stop me anyway?)
Sink streams and puddles and rivers and oceans
that ripple, babble, splash, spurt, run, gush
dribble, spout, drizzle, trickle, drip, rush
in my veins, salt and sweet
on life support
Crash into a cloud and keep it
for my own, my own fall
Tame tongues, soft, soul storming
so strange
my name is distant colored when they call
my voice fading, no, roaring
my mouth so fucking full of you
Sift ungodly hours, moonless and moving
for the waiting. The wishing, too
Catch leftover light
with my bare bones, bruised and burning
I stretch my skin, new limbs expand
out of my seams
I break and mend with everything I saved,
save all I’ve lost,
and keep them safe
within,
outwith these storms I rain
And now I’m left with all this life
to give me wings, to hold you tight
I breathed. I blinked.
Again