#mercury sable

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What about this slammed 90s Mercury Sable

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Mercury Sable 90s

Mercury Sable Station Wagon 1995. Source Wikipédia et Edmunds

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Perhaps the most noble pursuit for a car customizer is that of truckification. As the Buddha once said, all cars are meant to be trucks, and all trucks are meant to be cars. We can't do anything about the latter point, but every so often an automaker realizes they can cut the trunk off of a perfectly good station wagon and sell it for more money.

Perhaps the most famous example is that of the Chevrolet El Camino. More than a car, it is the generic brand for this entire genre of cars. Of course, this fame means that there's no way I can afford it, so we have to move down the list. Unfortunately, the less-loved 80s Chrysler products – with great names like Scamp and Rampage – are also right out. People have heard of those, too, and they are asking as much as one thousand five hundred dollars for a running car, no doubt stoked by breathless news coverage of the Barrett-Jackson auctions.

Japan has a couple of truck cars, too: special versions of the Nissan Sunny, the demented-but-lovable Suzuki Mighty Boy. Their nation is awash in discarded cars, rejected by a populace that has committed the twin sins of developing an effective, universal public transit option, and requiring that cars be correctly maintained before they can imperil human life. By the time you've imported one, you might as well have bought a Subaru Brat (also expensive.) It's enough to drive you to build your own car, which of course is what I did.

The only expense when you decide to build your own El Caminalike is sawzall blades. Sure, if you do it right, there's also a lot of fabrication, welding, and removal of the razor-sharp chunks of metal that you leave behind after cutting. Trucks, though, are not about doing it right. Trucks are about getting it done, in the least socially responsible fashion imaginable.

That's why I now own a 1995 Mercury Sable station wagon that has had everything south of the C-pillar cut off. Yes, I do realize that most actual trucks have a wall behind the cabin, to keep things like thieves, bugs, and rain out of the passenger compartment while you are trying to drive. However, I saved a lot of money, which I'll need in order to commission a custom-built truck topper on which to place in the back. I'm tired of my groceries getting wet whenever I put them in the bed.

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Cyberpunkish retro futuristic 1986 Mercury Sable! 

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Mercury Sable GS 1996

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Ford Motor Co, 1988

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1990 Mercury Sable Advertisement

Though it shared the same chassis and engine as the Taurus, Ford group wanted the Mercury Sable to feel like something more elegant. Its life began in 1985 and the name survived, somewhat miraculously, until 2009, when Mercury was nixed as a brand entirely. Until 2005, the Sable was built on the same platform as well. 

Over two-million Sables were sold across 22 model years, making it not only the third best-selling Mercury vehicle of all time, but also the third longest-running model in the brand’s history.