#mnet

[catch-me-hello]

Boys II Planet, Episode 5:  Okay, NOW both planets collide.

I’ve been reading about why Boys II Planet is structured like this, and turns out it was supposed to be two shows.  Planet K and Planet C would each debut their own group, and both groups would debut at the same time.  This was supposed to give the Chinese contestants their own showcase, free from the influence of K-pop.  It would have been a celebration of two cultures.

However, right before the premiere, agreements with the entertainment companies fell through, and Mnet had to scramble to restructure the show.  As a result, instead of celebrating two cultures, the Chinese trainees were outnumbered by the Korean trainees and forced to compete against them for eight spots in one group.  Mnet tried to make it up to the Chinese candidates by launching a spinoff show for the eliminated Planet C trainees, which I’m totally sure made up for the bullying and rigging and language barriers and fat-shaming. 

Let’s get on with it.  Welcome to Episode Five!

We finally get back to the moment where both planets come face to face.  The Planet K trainees are expressing amazement and clapping and carrying on, while the Planet C trainees stand quietly and stare them down.  They have their game faces on.  Knowing now that they were supposed to have their own show and own group to debut, I suspect there might be some resentment there.

We now have a total of 80 contestants.  Everyone’s rankings have been re-evaluated and are hidden in their name tags.  Everyone will now be walking around with their ranking right there on their tags.

Somehow, the one ranked first overall in both these groups is grumpy choreographer Yumeki.  I do not see how that is possible.  But here we are, so let’s roll with it.  Second place is Lee Sang Won, one of our former Trainee A members.  Both these contestants are on the Korean side. 

The Korean trainees were able to peel off their stickers together, in groups.  The Chinese trainees have to step forward, one by one, and do the reveals alone.  He Zhongxing (Mr. Sexy) ranks in 70th place.  Sun Hengyu, who is attempting to make a comeback after the failed group BLANK2Y, is in 25th place.  He Xinlong of BOY STORY ranks 16th, Zhang Jiahao from Make Mate 1 ranks 8th, and Zhou Anxin, also from Make Mate 1, ranks 3rd.  Our Planet C boys may not be in the top two spots, but they’re holding their own.

Now for the next mission.  It’s a One on One Class Battle.  A total of ten teams will be formed and will battle each other with the same song.  After the battle, there will be rankings, and whoever is left in the one star class will be eliminated.  There will be 32 eliminations.  Only the All Stars and Two Stars will survive.

The host explains the voting rules and benefits, and then adds one more benefit.  The best team will be on M Countdown.  They will also be on the Mnet global video platform Studio Choom.  There are five song choices, including “S-Class” by Stray Kids, which is my favorite right away. 

We go through a long segment of everyone choosing teams and deciding on songs.  So much is at stake.  Everyone is trying to avoid challenging the Avenger teams.  He Xinlong of BOY STORY is bummed because his team has a cutesy concept with TWS’ “Plot Twist.”  Xinlong dislikes cute concepts as much as I do. 

After about 20 minutes of this, we finally have our teams.  Time for the drama. 

The teams huddle up and choose their leaders.  It’s interesting that in this mix of Korean and Chinese, English is often the main language everyone can understand. 

Teams argue over the part distribution.  The real tension starts over on one of the teams for “Kill the Romeo” by ZeroBaseOne.  The only one speaking up is Chrisen Yang, a Chinese trainee from Los Angeles.  Two of his teammates want to be the lead rapper, and they’re refusing to budge.  They are He Zhongxing (Mr. Sexy) and a much younger, smaller teammate named Sho.  Chrisen makes the mistake of asking Sho if he’ll be the sub-rapper because he’s smaller.  That does not go over very well.  To be fair, it’s a bad idea.  In most cases, two people wanting the same part audition for it, and the other teammates vote.

Chrisen and Sho

Surprisingly, it’s He Zhongxing who suggests auditioning.  He’s gotten a bit more tactful and mature on this show.  Both of them perform the part for the group, but instead of voting, Chrisen just chooses Sho.  Does Chrisen not watch these survival reality shows?  Now Zhongxing is pissed off, and rightly so.

Meanwhile, over on  He Xinlong’s cutesy concept team, he is not thrilled about the cute song.  I can’t help laughing when his team cheers and he’s the only one not smiling.  I feel you, Xinlong.  Just plaster on a big smile and power through it.

Whee.

Xinlong wanted the Stray Kids song.  I love that he’s a Stray Kids fan, even though they’re one of the groups that pushed his own group off the charts. 

We move around to the other groups, watching people struggle with high parts, audition for killing parts, and worry about the competition.  On the TVXQ teams, we have some trainees who are so young, they’ve never heard the song their team is doing.  One of these trainees is Yusen, a 17 year-old Taiwanese-American trainee.  He has a strong, high, powerful singing voice and immediately gets the main vocal.  He loves the part so much, he sings it nonstop all during rehearsals, driving his teammates insane because along with being strong, high, and powerful, his voice is always LOUD.  He does not seem to have a volume control dial.

We also get a funny moment over on the All-Star team led by Yumeki.  Zhou Anxin is the only Planet C trainee on the team.  When the others ask if they can call him Anxin, he says his nickname is Xin.  The others laugh because “Xin” sounds like the Korean word for “God.” 

They move to the practice rooms, and I’ve always found it odd that they make the competing teams practice in the same room.  Some teams find it intimidating and don’t want to rehearse in front of their rivals.

That night, everyone goes back to the dorms, where the Planet C trainees now have to move in and meet their new roommates.  I don’t think the one and two star trainees have to surrender most of their luggage.  They are rather dismayed by the small, crowded rooms.  Still, everyone seems to be getting along.  At least until Yusen comes up the stairs, singing his TVXQ part at the top of his lungs.  At this point, I think his own teammates are hoping he’ll lose his voice.

We get a montage of the next three days, during which the teams practice nonstop.  Finally, we’re at D-Day.  The fans are here.  The trainees are preparing for battle.  The crowd is getting excited.  Then the trainees walk in from the back of the arena, and the crowd really goes nuts.

The audience members have their little voting devices and will be voting for their favorite groups and favorite individual members.  The trainees have a mukbang contest to see who goes first (don’t ask), and then we’re ready to do this.  The first battle will be the Stray Kids song “S-Class.”  This will be a battle between an All-Star group and a One-Star group.  We’re starting strong!

And of course, we screech to a halt and do a flashback.  Both teams are doing their evaluations in front of the coaches.  The One-Star team does terribly, which means they’ll be great when it’s Showtime.  It’s the standard Flashback Formula.

Let’s see if I’m right.  Showtime!

MCND’s Song Min Jae is the standout here.  He’s absolutely killing it with his strong vocals and sexy expressions.  So is Kim Hyeon Seo with his wild, fun rapping.  On the other hand, we have poor Hu Hanwen, who’s been struggling with the high notes all during rehearsals.  When it’s his turn in the battle, he can’t hit the notes.  His voice is weak and off key, and it’s the only bad part of the performance.  But it’s enough that the audience notices.  Audiences for these shows can forgive a lot, but these fans are visibly wincing.

Now it’s the All-Star team’s turn.  We get their flashback, and I’m concerned because one of the members has one arm in a sling.  Zhang Jiahao from Make Mate 1 is on this team, and I’m really pulling for him, as well as WHIB member Kim Jun Min.  But Kim In Hu is having trouble with the rap part.  Fingers crossed that he can pull it together by Showtime.

Time to find out.

There are some AMAZING rappers in this group.  The whole team is ferocious.  Kim Jun Min is the scene-stealer, but this whole team kills it, and I know they’ve won this.  The roar of the audience is way louder than it was for the One-Stars. 

Time for the voting.  By a vote of 910 to 635, the All-Star team wins.  That wasn’t hard to predict.

The next song battle is to the TWS song “Plot Twist.”  The cutesy concept one.  I’m glad we’re getting this out of the way early.  Both teams come on to the stage in their cute little outfits, He Xinlong doing his best to look excited.    

Yup, not regretting this at ALL.

We’re starting with the All-Star team and flashing back to their rehearsals.  The team is giving it everything they’ve got, except for He Xinlong, who suddenly stops dancing and steps away from the rest of the team.  He keeps trying to step back in, but he clearly doesn’t know the choreography.  The coaches demand to know what happened, and he says he forgot it.  He doesn’t give any other explanation. 

The coaches are speechless.  When they find their voices, they scold him and tell him to leave if he’s just going to stop trying.  What is going on with Xinlong?  He’s been a professional idol for almost half his life.  He knows better than this, so I suspect he’s getting an evil edit.

In rehearsals after he gets chewed out, he’s just sitting depressed on the floor.  Maybe his mind is shutting down because he’s been dancing and performing for so many years.  Then something totally shocks me.  One of his teammates slides up next to him and says, “Xinlong, it’s okay.  You know how on these shows, if you’re received poorly during the midpoint check, that means you crush it during the real show.”

THESE TRAINEES KNOW ABOUT THE FLASHBACK FORMULA.

I wait for the showrunners to storm onto the set, grab this kid, drag him by his ankles out the door and down the stairs, and then demand to have this footage erased.  But no, he just says the Flashback Formula out loud, and no one does anything about it.

We get more of the flashback and confessionals.  Xinlong is saying he’s lost his confidence.  But his team leader gives him a pep talk.  He starts trying harder in rehearsals.  He clearly knows how this formula goes.  He starts getting his confidence back.

And now, it’s Showtime. 

It’s a perfect performance, just as the Flashback Formula predicted.  This All-Star team of four Planet C trainees and four Planet K trainees worked together and gave an exciting performance.  The pressure is now on the One-Star team.  But that will have to wait until next time, because the episode ends.

That was certainly a more fun episode than the last one.  In Episode Six, we’ll get more performances, more votes, and more eliminations as we kick 32 hopeful trainees to the curb and watch their dreams die.  Should be exciting!  See you then!

[catch-me-hello]

Boys II Planet, Episode 4:  Things start to get uncomfortable.

The planets have finally aligned.  The Chinese contestants and Korean contestants are now together in the same room, and we’re ready for our next mission.  Let’s do this.  Welcome to Episode Four!

Right off the bat, we’re hitting the brakes and going back to Planet C, because of course, we have unfinished business.    We still have to see the rest of the initial performances on the Chinese side, which means we’re getting the same episode we had last time, except with different contestants.  Settle in, folks. 

We’re starting with the three former contestants on the first Boys Planet, Xuan Hao, Krystian, and Cai Jinxin.  We learn that Xuan Hao is now thirty years old, even though he still looks in his early twenties.  Korean skin care is something else. 

They’re performing the Stray Kids song “Chk Chk Boom.”  Let’s see how much better they’ve gotten in the past two years.

Kind of disappointing, actually.  It feels like they’re just going through the motions.  They’re not in sync, and it just feels halfhearted.  Given how Xuan Hao says his age is making him desperate to debut, I expected something with more drive.  The judges are also let down.  Krystian and Cai Jinxin get one star,  and Xuan Hao gets two stars. 

Next up is someone the judges are surprised to see on the roster.  “What is he doing here?” they ask.  It’s Dang Hong Hai.  He was also on Season 1 of Boys Planet and was eliminated about halfway through.  He’s been training hard for the past two years and is back for another shot.  Let’s see if he can do better than the previous group.

At first, something’s wrong.  He’s off the beat and off-key.  But he recovers quickly and throws in some magic by tossing a handful of glitter into the air.  He ends strong.  The shaky beginning must have been from nerves.  The judges tell him sternly that starting a performance like that in the future would get him eliminated, but he gets the All Star. 

Now we have the duo of Xue Suren (a backup dancer for P1Harmony) and … someone else.  We never get introduced to his teammate.  We get a quick few seconds of his performance, and that’s it.  We get a few more brief clips of other performances, some with names, some not.  We just know they’re really good performances.  I like that the show is moving quickly like this. 

We’re now down to the last team, and of course, it’s BOY STORY.  Time to find out what members of an incredibly successful group are doing here.  After their debut in 2018, they had a great run until 2025, when these three members quit.  Apparently, group activities were slowing down.  The band’s popularity was fading.  They were being eclipsed by Stray Kids.

Okay.  Imagine you debuted when you looked like this:

Now you’re twenty years old, and you’ve been touring and recording and meeting fans and everything else nonstop.  When it just ends, I imagine it would either be relief or time to panic.  In the case of these three guys, it sounds like they’re panicking.  They’re not ready to leave the industry.  We see clips of He Xinlong being interviewed at his audition for this show, and he’s fighting back tears.  He’s given his childhood to this industry.  I imagine it’s become his identity.  If he’s not part of a successful group anymore, who is he?

We return to the present, where our boys are ready to give it another shot.  Interestingly, they’re doing the Stray Kids song “Back Door.”

They still got it.  It’s one of those few exciting, electrifying performances you get in these first rankings.  The judges love it.  They get a standing ovation from the other trainees, who just got a free BOY STORY concert.  After giving them nothing but praise, the judges then give Jia Hanyu and Li Zihao two stars.  He Xinlong is the only one getting the All Star. 

The other trainees are stunned, and I’m right there with them.  That was a flawless performance.  In their explanation, one of the judges tells Jia Hanyu he needs to lose weight.  Wow.  I don’t think I’ve ever heard a judge on these shows say that to a contestant.  As they’re leaving the stage, Star Master Kim Jae Joong calls after them, “Jia Hanyu, you need to lose weight!” 

I went online and found this actually caused a lot of controversy among the viewers, especially since Kim Jae Joong seems to have made comments like this to several trainees during the course of the show.  Viewers lashed out at him over social media.  He responded in an Instagram post that was later deleted, saying Jia Hanyu had already mentioned dieting and was aware he needed to lose weight, but that part wasn’t on the show.  The viewers (rightfully, in my opinion) said it didn’t matter if Hanyu said it first.  Jae Joong should have said it at all. 

Well.  We’re only in Episode 4, and we already have backlash.  From what I’ve heard, it’s going to get worse.  Strap in.

The Placement Battle has ended for Planet C.  Thirteen participants have been eliminated.  Now it’s time for the Second Placement Battle, the one where they perform the signal song over and over again, which means I get to hear it for two hours again!  I’m just going to go ahead and take my migraine meds now.

And hey, there’s Rickey!  I assumed he’d been eliminated, but he made it through the Placement Battle.  (On a related note, I’ll be recapping the Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai tomorrow and hope to have it posted no later than Monday.)

Time to view the signal song.  The screen lights up, and Zhang Hao appears, which is interesting.  He was still part of ZeroBaseOne when this show was going on.  In March of this year, he was one of four members who had to leave because they were on a temporary contract that expired, which I never fully understood.  He’s now part of the boy group And2ble. You’d think someone would have taken care of those contracts before they expired. Sometimes the K-pop industry feels like it’s been run by hamsters with severe attention deficit disorder.

Now our Planet C trainees head for Planet Camp, which looks a lot like the one our Planet K trainees are attending.  Did the show build duplicate campuses for this show?  What is the budget for this series?

Just like on Planet K, the trainees get their new uniforms.  This group doesn’t have to surrender their belongings.  Another thing that’s different is that their uniforms are way nicer.  The Planet K colors are black, gray and white.  The Planet C colors are yellow, green, and purple, and they look like sports jerseys. 

They also get better accommodations.  One Stars sleep four to a room instead of six.  Two Stars are three to a room instead of four, and All Stars are still two to a room.  All the rooms look nicely decorated instead of looking like prison cells.  And the All-Star building puts the one on Planet K to shame.  The All-Star Planet K snack room is the size of a medium closet.  This is the snack room on Planet C. 

After settling in, the contestants report to training.  They’re also struggling with the difficult dance moves and the song’s high key.  Right away, He Zhongxing (Mr. Sexy) has checked out.  He does his own dance moves instead of the choreography and keeps dancing when the coaches are giving instruction.  He gets scolded, which makes him resentful.  He doesn’t seem to have the discipline for this. 

Most of the trainees are not doing well.  The best group is the One Stars, who are hungry to get to the All Star level.  The coaches are so frustrated, they decide to go ahead and announce who needs to remove the stars from their name tags.  One of them is He Zhongxing.  Another is Lim Jack, the Malaysian-Australian trainee, and here’s where I notice something else.  The coaches have been mocking Lim Jack because he has trouble understanding Korean and Chinese. (His native language is English.)  Not all the candidates come from Korea or China.  In Lim Jack’s case, it looks like he’s being verbally bullied. 

I have so many questions about the Planet C contestants and why the show was set up this way.  I definitely heard criticism about this show before I recapped it, mostly about how these contestants were at a disadvantage, and there were no translators on set.  Also, this was supposed to be two separate shows, where finalists were chosen for the group and then brought together at the very end.  At the last minute, the show turned into this.  I’m feeling uncomfortable at the way these contestants are being spoken to.

In the one-star dance class, the coach is being particularly brutal, telling some trainees they have no talent and should just leave.  I’ve seen him get frustrated with Korean trainees before, but not like this. 

Mr. Sexy Zhongxing is still having trouble.  He’s trying to learn the song and do his own thing at the same time.  The Korean coach gives up and tells him, “You’re bad.”  For all of Zhongxing’s defiance, he does look crushed.  

Lim Jack is struggling to learn the lyrics, saying in frustration, “Chinese is harder than I thought.”  The coach tells him, “I don’t know why you’re using Chinese as an excuse.”

I hate this.  Granted, the point is that Lim Jack is not singing well and is possibly tone deaf, but the lyrics being in Chinese is also presenting a problem.  It doesn’t help that Jack doesn’t know enough about the culture to be able to read the room, and his lighthearted responses are coming across as disrespectful.

A couple of days in, when morale across the camp is really low, we get a visitor.  It’s Zhang Hao from ZeroBaseOne.  He walks them through some of the harder parts of the choreography.

Everyone gets a chance to call home, but the amount of time you get to talk depends on your star level.  When time’s up, the call disconnects.  One of the family members says the call is coming from a Korean number.  So wait, are they not actually in China?  Are they in Korea?

The worst call is Lim Jack’s.  He and his mother speak in Aussie English, and Jack tells her, “I’m putting my mind, soul, and everything into this, but for some reason, the lyrics aren’t staying in my head.  I think I’m an idiot.”

“You are,” his mom says.  At first I think she’s being sarcastically playful, but then she says it again and HANGS UP ON HIM.  The show tries to tell us he ran out of time.  Either way, this is awful.  If he did run out of time, I wonder if his mom feels horrible about that being the last thing she said to him.

Let’s just get through this. 

Time for the individual tests.  One by one, the contestants get in front of the judges and perform the song.  And guess what?  I just saw online that this signal song was subject to a plagiarism controversy because part of it uses the same melody as “Sing Me” by the group Day6.  I’m just going to stop web surfing for now and finish watching this episode.

When it’s Jia Hanyu’s turn, I’m mentally daring the judges to say one damn word about his weight.  But they don’t have to because he is completely checked out.  He doesn’t know the choreography, and he’s way off-key.  It’s generous of the judges to drop him to one star instead of just eliminating him.

The trainees are doing very poorly overall, and then we get bad news about two of the Dragon Boys, Lin Quinan and Chen Yuqi.  (Lin Quinan is the actor who did a movie with Jackie Chan and did that amazing leap in his first performance on this show and still got only one star.)  They are both getting frustrated during rehearsal.  This song really is difficult, way harder than the song in the first series.

They leave before they can do their individual tests and go back to the camp.  We get screen text telling us they talked with the crew and decided to leave the show.

I hate this.  I really wanted to see Lin Quinan make it to the end of this.  But seeing how the game seems to be rigged against this side of the show, I don’t blame him for leaving.  His teammate Zhang Shunyu is his cousin, who is devastated to see him leave.    

When it’s Zhang Shunyu’s turn for the individual test, he puts his own spin on it and gets promoted to the All Star class.

Others are struggling as well.  Mr. Sexy Zhongxing sits waiting his turn, not saying anything or interacting with the people around him.  I really don’t want to see him leave the show.  He tells us in a confessional he’s used to practicing by himself, so being surrounded by others all day is making him uncomfortable.  He sounds like he has social anxiety, and I can certainly relate. 

Because he leaves class to practice on his own, the other trainees think he’s slacking off.  Now he’s being ostracized by the rest of the trainees, which I’m sure isn’t helping at all.  Now I want to see him nail this individual test.

He does so well, the other trainees are stunned.  Since he was made a no-star trainee, I want to see him at least get his two stars back.  The judge says to him, “You were a No Star candidate.  But you mustn’t have taken it seriously.  Your skills didn’t show as much as we anticipated.”  He then dismissively says “good job” before demoting him to One Star.

I feel punched in the gut.  This show definitely hates the Planet C candidates.  Zhongxing practiced nonstop and showed a huge improvement.  He may not have been All Star material, but he deserved better than this.  As he slumps back in his seat, I hope he takes some comfort in the fact that the other trainees are now rallying around him, patting him on the back and telling him it’s okay.  He may prefer his solitude, but he’s not isolated anymore.

A few more All Stars perform well enough to keep their positions, and them Lim Jack is up next.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed.  But his dancing is all over the place, and he’s still tone deaf.  He can’t do this.  He never should have been placed in the All Star class to begin with.  He’s knocked down to one star.

The last one to perform is Zhou Anxin from Make Mate 1, and he’s so nervous, he forgets part of the song and his voice cracks.  My heart sinks.  I know he can do so much better.  I guess the judges are thinking the same thing, because they keep him in the All Star class.  The scoring is so inconsistent.

We do get some good news for He Zhongxing.  The judges have reconsidered his score and sent him back up to the Two Star class.  I feel relieved.  It’s the first time I’ve seen him smile all episode.

Next, all the trainees move to the big stage to perform the signal song.  Planet K’s stage theme was water, and this one appears to be fire. 

Zhou Anxin is given the center/killing part position after auditioning for it with a much stronger and more confident voice.  We see that Rickey now has no stars and is performing on the floor by the stage.  I really hope he wins Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai.

Okay.  Let’s film this thing.

After filming the video, the judges tell the trainees about the viewer votes that will determine if they go home or not.  Everyone heads over to the gym.  They don’t have to have their suitcases with them this time.  A lot of All Stars get bumped down to two stars.  He Zhongxing is still with us, even though he was bumped down to one star. 

A LOT of candidates get flat-out eliminated.  A total of 36 candidates are sent home, which is mind-boggling.  Among those leaving us are Krystian and Lim Jack. 

Only 28 participants from Planet C make it through.  As opposed to the 52 on Planet K.  I have many thoughts about this, but I’ll keep them to myself for now.

The coaches tell the 28 survivors that they will be battling Planet K next.  All 52 members of them.  We se the final rankings from the votes, and that’s it for this bummer of an episode.

I know it’s going to get worse for Planet C.  I want to view it and judge for myself, but I’ve already seen enough to understand why viewers were so frustrated about this show.

On that pleasant note, see you in Episode Five.

Go to Episode 5 recap

[catch-me-hello]

Boys II Planet, Episode 3:  Drilling the signal song right into your brain

We have a LOT to cover in this episode.  Planets K and C will come together, we have two cliffhangers to resolve, and we still haven’t finished all the opening performances.  I also want to see a performance by Rickey, our crossover trainee from Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai.  And will He Zhongxing’s sexiness be diminished by his measly two star rating?  Let’s find out!  Welcome to Episode Three!

We start off back on Planet K, continuing with the initial evaluations.  Next up is Kim Jun Seo from the still-active group WEi.  Dance Coach Kany lights up, saying she knows him.  Things quickly get awkward when Jun Seo doesn’t recognize her and is confused by her enthusiastic greeting.  Turns out she knows him from a BL Drama called Secret Relationships.  Jun Seo performs one of his monologues from the show, and Kany is fangirling all over the place.  Boy, are things going to get even more awkward if his performance doesn’t go well.

Fortunately, his performance goes very well.  It’s a sensual performance of “Sweet Venom” by ENHYPEN.  He hits those high notes while dancing, keeping his voice steady, and his expressions make my knees weak.  That acting experience comes in handy here. 

I’m surprised when he only gets two stars.  Kany tells him he needed more versatility in his expressions.  Given the nature of the song, I’m not sure what other expressions he could have made.  The trainees in the audience again complain to each other that the judging is too strict.  I don’t think it’s strict, I think it’s vague and inconsistent. 

Next up is the sweet, happy, and energetic Jeong Hyeon Jun.  He’s only sixteen years old.  After a breathlessly upbeat introduction, he launches into his performance of a song by GGUM, and his whole demeanor goes dark. 

Another crazy impressive performance.  He gets roaring applause in the studio when he finishes.  Everyone’s predicting an All-Star, and thankfully that’s what he gets.  If the score had been any lower, I think the trainees would have stormed the judges’ table and started throwing perfectly manicured hands.

Hyeon Jun is thrilled because he’s a huge fan of Kany’s.  He asks if she can join him onstage to do one of her routines.  The other judges get their cameras ready. 

It’s just so much fun to watch.  Hyeon Jun is now one of my picks to win this thing.

We’re getting some great performances here.  Kim Dong Hyeon and Yusen do a Justhis rap called “The Roots,” right in front of the man himself, and it’s aggressive and wild.  We don’t get to see their score, but I’m assuming they both got the All-Star.

Kim Dong Hyeon and Yusen

These performances are moving along quickly because we still have a lot more to get through.  Hip-hop duo Justin and Chung San Hyeon do a smooth, bluesy hip hop that has me chair dancing, but they only get one star and two stars.  I don’t know what they did wrong.  Justhis just says he thinks they’re talented. 

We get more experienced idol performances.  Members of WHIB are here, and they perform another ENHYPEN song.  The judges love it.  Members of DKB are also here, doing a P1Harmony song, and it’s hard to believe human bodies can move like that.  All members of both groups get All Stars. 

I know I rushed through that, but that’s because I wanted to get to Yumeki’s performance, which is where we left off at the end of Episode One.  Everyone is in awe of the choreography legend who has decided to try his hand at being an idol.  If you’ll remember, he’s not a singer, so he had to take a lot of singing lessons to get ready for this.  It will be his first time singing onstage.  He’s performing “Rainism.” 

I’ll give him this – his dancing is incredible.  It’s like the music has possessed him, and his body has become an instrument.  As for his voice, I’ll just say that his dancing is incredible.  I’m actually kind of pissed that his vocal coach told him he was ready to come up here and do this. 

I have no idea how the judges will vote on this.  His dancing is enough for an All Star, but if this is what his singing is like after vocal training, there’s no way he’ll make it to the final group.  The judges are having a hard time with this.  None of them want to vote.  Yumeki is one of their peers in the industry, and they are now in a very difficult position.  They finally give him one star.

Yumeki leaves the stage, angry and embarrassed.  He goes back to sit in the audience, and no one can look at him.  We get a quick preview of the next episode, and it looks like he’s going to have a really bad time of it.  I genuinely feel bad for him. 

The Class Placement on Planet K is now over.  They have 20 All Stars, 24 Two Stars, and 25 one stars.  Eleven participants got no stars and were sent home.  The participants line up to get their uniforms, color-coded according to the number of stars. 

Now it’s time for the Second Class Placement Battle.  It’s …. (heavy sigh) … the Signal Song Test.  Once again, we will be introduced to the show’s theme song that will be beaten into our heads in every single episode while we curse the day the songwriter was born.  Each trainee will perform the song solo for the judges, who will rank them again.  Those earning no stars will be sent home.  The judges will also decide who will take the Center position for the song and do the Killing Part.

There’s a catch.  The All Star contestants will get to see the choreography first so they will have an advantage in the amount of practice time.  The one and two stars turn their backs to the stage. 

The screen lights up.  The song is called “Hola Solar.”  We get an introduction from Seong Han Bin of ZeroBaseOne.  He also performs the choreography. 

The Planet K group heads for Planet Camp, and this place is NICE.

Again, there’s a catch.  The place may look nice, but the conditions of each room will depend on the occupant’s star ranking.  The All-Stars get cozy 2-person rooms.  Two-stars sleep four to a room, and one-stars sleep on the roof.  Kidding.  One-stars actually sleep six to a room, but if they want more room and privacy, they should probably move to the roof.

All-Stars also get enough storage space for all their things.  Everyone else has to put some of their stuff in boxes for storage.  I can’t help laughing at how mean this is.  All the one and two stars open their suitcases and start deciding what to put in boxes.  The whole scene looks like the lost luggage department at the airport.

I can’t wait to see what mealtimes look like.  I’m guessing the All Stars will get catered fine dining, two stars will get a box of saltines to share and all the flat soda they can drink, and the one stars will have to catch rats and cook them over cigarette lighters.

The one and two stars cram themselves into their tiny rooms that look like prison cells.  The All Stars move into rooms that are nicely decorated and look like college dorms.  It really puts the lower stars at a disadvantage in getting themselves ready to perform.  On the other hand, if the rooms are so awful, they’ll be spending more time in the practice rooms improving their skills.  We do get a great scene of the lower stars breaking into the All-Star dorm and raiding their snack room.

The camp has a fluffy guard dog who brings them notes in a little backpack, and he’s adorable.  His name is Planet Guard Kim Choon Bae.

Everyone at Planet Camp gets settled in and heads over to a big gym for group training.  They’re learning the signal song.  The song is in a very high key.  It’s a mean trick the showrunners do to these trainees on every survival show.  Then everyone gets to see the choreography, and they start learning that.  It’s a lot harder than last year’s signal song, and everyone’s having trouble with it, even the All Stars.  Yumeki, of course, nails it.  This is where he shines.

Our Trainee A team, Lee Leo and Lee Sang Won, are really struggling.  They’re the only ones out of the All Stars who can’t seem to get the movements.  Even some of the best, most experienced idols are slow to learn choreography. 

It get worse for two-star Masato.  When it’s his turn to demonstrate, he can’t remember all the steps and just gives up halfway through.  The coaches make him remove the stars from his name tag.  He’s not the only one.  The ones who couldn’t hit the high notes or sing well at all also have to remove their stars.  They’re not being eliminated yet, but they are dangerously close to the edge. 

For the next couple of days, these guys sing and dance nonstop.  The same song.  I don’t know how they don’t lose their minds.  They sing in training classes, they sing during meal breaks, they sing in the dorms.  Their voices start sounding hoarse.

We spend a lot of time with the one stars as they struggle to learn the choreography by watching the video on a tablet.  They disagree on some of the moves, and with Yumeki in this class, pride is getting in the way.  I think the other trainees are starting to think less of him.  He really should not have done this show. 

Meanwhile, over in the 2 star dance class, everyone is trying to help Masato learn faster so he can get his stars back.  Masato eventually goes into the one star class to ask Yumeki for help.

After about three days of this, we get a visitor to Planet Camp.  It’s Seong Han Bin himself, from ZeroBaseOne!  He arrives bringing tanghulu, skewered fruits coated in a sugar glaze. 

We get a segment of the trainees calling home and see baby pictures of the trainees with their parents.  This is all very sweet, but I’m ready to check back on Planet C and get this show on the road. 

Not yet.  We arrive at the Signal Song Test Day.  The one stars go first.  Their dancing has improved, but those voices are killing me.  I honestly think these shows purposely let a lot of untalented people through so they will have people to eliminate.  Most of these trainees keep their one-star status.  Three of them manage to rise to the two star level.  Congratulations, guys!  You still can’t get your belongings out of storage!

When it’s Yumeki’s turn, his singing has surprisingly improved.  He doesn’t have a good sounding voice, but now it’s on key and not shaky.  He even hits the high notes.  I’m positive the judges will move him up to a two star ranking.  But no.  He gets the All Star.  When the judges explain why, I guess I can see it.  He’s the best dancer and shows improvement in the vocals they didn’t think possible.  With the advantages provided in an All Star status, he could get even better.  And he gets all his luggage back!  Yay Yumeki!

“Thank God.  My Speed Stick has been in storage for a week…”

When it’s Masato’s turn, I’ve got my fingers crossed.  He’s been working so hard.  His performance is such an improvement, he gets his two stars back.  He saved himself from the brink.

The show spends an hour showing us these contestants performing the same song over and over again until I’m ready to scream.  Where are the Planet C candidates?!

Finally, everyone regroups in a huge gym, standing in their new classes.  Three contestants dropped down to No Star status, but that doesn’t mean they’re eliminated.  Wait, it doesn’t?  The judges told us in the beginning of this episode that those who dropped to No Stars would be sent home.  The judges explain they still have to wait for the viewers to vote.  If they don’t get enough votes, then they’ll be sent home.

Now everyone goes into a huge auditorium to she the stage on which they will be performing the signal song yet again.  Just like in the first season, the stage tier they get to stand on depends on their rank.  And this stage is amazing.    

The Killing Part goes to Kim Geon Woo.  He’s the one whose initial performance didn’t wow me, but he got the All Star.  He will now be in the Center, starring as the face of Boys II Planet in the video of this song. 

Everyone takes their place on the platform and gets ready to shoot the video, but there’s an interruption.  Someone is entering the auditorium.  Could it possibly be … no, it’s not the C Planet trainees.  It’s the judges, here to tell them that after the viewers vote on the performance these guys are about to do, those with no stars will actually go home this time. 

The cameras roll, and I’ll admit, this looks amazing.  Especially the part where three of the performers dance in water. 

So we learn that the video has gone on YouTube and gotten eleventy billion trillion views and likes and the voters are losing their minds and we know the drill.  The contestants then had some fan meetings all over Korea.  We’re told 160 of them were doing these meetings, which means the Planet C people must have joined them.  This timeline is confusing.

Now we’re back after all that madness, but just on Planet K.  Everyone is in their dorms, waiting to gather and find out the new rankings and who is being eliminated.

“Hey guys, remember those eighty other contestants from China we saw at the fan meetings?  Whatever happened to them?”

Everyone gathers in a gymnasium.  There are currently 69 of them.  The judges tell them only 52 will advance to the next round, which means 17 people are going home.  One by one, the trainees step forward to find out if they’re staying or not, and they have to bring their suitcases with them.  Wow.  Well, at least the lower stars can visit all their belongings for a while.

All the All Stars get to stay.  The eliminated trainees come from the lower stars.  We’re losing Ryan, the American trainee we met in Episode One and never saw perform.  We’re also losing Lee Yoon Chan, the one who came in with the delusional Nu Ri who begged for one star and still got sent home.  Those are the only ones that stand out to me.  The others got lost in the crowd. 

Our eliminated candidates wheel their luggage out to the waiting cars, and the remaining stunned trainees, many of whom just said goodbye to close friends, try to pull themselves together to see what happens next.

We cut to the next morning at Planet Camp to find Planet Guard Kim Choon Bae sprawled out on the lawn, sound asleep.  I know he has a dog house.  We’ve seen it on the show.  It honestly looks like he got plastered last night and passed out on the way home. 

“zzzz no I kin drive … gimme my keeez…”

Once again, all the contestants gather in a big room and stand on risers, awaiting orders.  The Planet Master arrives, Ong Seong Wu.  Is this the first time we’ve met him?  I think so.  The Planet Master on Planet C was a different guy.  Here’s a picture of Ong Seong Wu just in case.

The trainees are going nuts and talking about how handsome he is, so now I’m sure we’re meeting this guy for the first time.  There’s only four minutes left in this episode, so he’d better be here to introduce the contestants from China. 

Sure enough, he says, “Before I tell you about the first mission, I have important information to share with you.  Let’s reveal it right now!”

Then the curtain behind him drops, and FINALLY, our two planets are in the same room!  But the Planet C contestants are all blurry.  It’s like the show doesn’t know that WE know they exist, so they’re not spoiling a surprise by showing us it’s them.  This is what I just sat through a three-hour episode for?

You Boys Planet people always know how to piss me off, don’t you?  I know it’s because we haven’t been told who the final survivors are on Planet C yet, but did we have to sit through over an hour of trainees singing the same song over and over and over again?  You could have cut half an hour out of that, revealed the Planet C survivors, and ended the show with both teams meeting each other!

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to take a sleeping pill so I don’t lie awake with that song looping through my head all night.  Tomorrow I’m listening to a solid hour of Weird Al Yankovic before recapping the next episode.

See you then!

Go to Episode 4

[catch-me-hello]

Boys II Planet, Episode 2:  Meanwhile, In China…

I couldn’t wait to start this episode to find out if our grumpy choreographer contestant Yumeki is really going to bomb his first performance or if the preview we saw was just a misleading edit.  But it turns out we’re going to have to wait, because we’re heading over to Planet C to see the trainees in China get their star evaluations.  This should be exciting.  Welcome to Episode Two!

We’re introduced to a team of trainees called the Dragon Boys.  They’re a Taekwondo team from Ningbo who have won several competitions.  They’re the first to enter the studio in China and watch as a simulated sunrise lights up the seating area.  It’s so cool.  They make their way up the steps, and, of course, sit in the All-Star section. 

As the other trainees enter, I see right away I’ll be relying on the subtitles for the names.  On Planet K, the names are written on the name tags and on the screens in Korean and English.  Here, everything is written in Chinese and Korean. 

Another difference is that these trainees are given those little voting devices and told to rate each other based on first impressions.  That causes immediate tension when the Dragon Boys see the next group of sweet-faced, innocent boys from Beijing enter and immediately give them No Stars.  The Beijing team looks genuinely hurt and take their seats in the No Star section.  I hope there will be payback for this. 

Everyone gets the voting devices as they are seated, and the voting is a little less brutal now.  There are some really tall contestants here with striking good looks.  Our Beijing boys start shrinking in their seats.

We meet He Zhongxing, who tells us approximately five billion times that he’s sexy.  That’s his whole thing.  “Let’s be sexy together!” he calls to the seated trainees.  To be fair, he is quite handsome, with a jawline that could cut through steel, but maybe calm down.  He proceeds to battle for the seats he wants by having sexy contests, where the two competitors basically stare at each other.

He Zhongxing – too sexy for his chair

More groups come in, and then everyone sits up because we have a Boys Planet team – these are three trainees who participated in the first Boys Planet and are here to try again.  They are Krystian, Cai Jinxin, and Xuan Hao.  I remember Krystian right away.  He got such an evil edit in Season One, he was getting bullied online by viewers.  (I bought into the storyline and said mean things about him in my recaps as well.)  I’m surprised he wants to put himself through this again, but I’m glad he didn’t give up.

Xuan Hao, Krystian, and Cai Jinxin

I’m on the lookout for Rickey from Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai because I know he did this show on the Planet C side before doing that one.  As I scan the faces, another team is announced.  It’s a large group of experienced K-pop trainees.  Just like VERIVERY and MCND on Planet K, these are actual experienced idols who are here to compete.  We have members of BOY STORY, which is interesting because they’re actually a C-pop group, but they’re managed by K-pop bigwigs JYP.  We also have Dang Honghai from Season One of Boys Planet.  He’s not with the other three because he was actually part of a trainee team called NEWKIES. 

Just like on the Planet K side, everyone in the All Star seats has to make way for this team.  I recognize Zhou Anxin from Make Mate 1.  We see clips of when BOY STORY first debuted in 2017, and wow, they were literal children.  Their first single was called “How Old R U.”  I am not making that up.

Okay, so everyone is seated, the lights go down, and we know the drill.  Time to meet our coaches and get these star evaluations underway.  The same coaches we met in Episode One are also here for the Planet C trainees, and everyone goes nuts for them.  We do have some new faces, though, such as Dance Coaches Jrick and Xiaoting.  And of course, Justhis and his sunglasses are back. We also have a new Chief Master, as they call him on Planet C.  It’s Kim Jae Joong, who’s actually a Korean singer, songwriter, actor, and director.

Jrick, Xiaoting, Justhis, and Kim Jae Joong

Time for the performances!  I am psyched.  Let’s goooooo!

We’re starting with an amateur team.  It’s the guy who won’t stop saying how sexy he is, He Zhongxing, along with his two teammates, Zheng Kun and Yuan Wei.  He’d better have the performance to back this up.  I’m expecting serious Magic Mike material. 

They’re really good.  Zheng Kun’s voice is a problem – it cracks on a high note, and he comes in a beat late on another line.  His dancing is also rather stiff.  But those are the only flaws, other than He Zhongxing constantly saying “sexy,” which is starting to get on my nerves.  The judges tell them that, in terms of vocals, “Your excitement exceeded your concentration.” 

Yuan Wei gets one star, and He Zhongxing “Mr. Sexy” gets two.  But Zheng Kun is being shown the door.  What’s interesting is that Zhongxing is PISSED, not about his friend being eliminated, but that he only got two stars.  He expected the All Star, and he’s so mad about it in a confessional, he cuts the interview short and leaves. 

Meanwhile, Zheng Kun decides to take the second test.  Because it’s just him, the other two aren’t at risk of losing their stars.  He sings a ballad, and it sounds so much better because it’s more in his range instead of those high notes he was trying to hit while dancing.  He actually has a beautiful voice.  The judges are surprised.  They change his class to one star. 

Next up is an experienced idol, Chen Kaiwen.  He’s performing one of my favorite K-pop songs, “Get A Guitar” by RIIZE.  Turns out Jrick directed the choreography for that song.  Chen Kaiwen will have an especially critical judge watching him.

His voice is weak, and he can’t keep it steady while dancing, but he nails the tricky choreography.  The judges give him two stars.  Just like on Planet K, the other contestants can’t believe how strict the judges are being, but I think they’re being fair.  The vocals matter, and this voice needs some work.

Now for a team of amateur trainees from Shanghai.  They are Chen Bowen, Fan Zheyi, Yang Jiapeng, and Hu Hanwen.  They’re performing “Devil Game” by ZeroBaseOne. 

The standout here is 17 year-old Chen Bowen.  But they’re all so good.  They perform like an experienced idol group.  “How can this amateur team present such quality?” one of the judges exclaims.  They give Hu Hanwen and Yang Jiapeng two stars.  Chen Bowen and Fan Zheyi get the All-Star.  Honestly, I thought all of them should have gotten the All-Star, but at least none of them are going home.

Next up is adorable, angelic-looking Sun Jiayang.  He’s got three others in his group, but no one is looking at them.

They perform a BOY STORY song called “Pump !t Up.”  Right in front of the original performers.  It’s a cutesy concept, which always makes me cringe, but they do a good job.  My favorite part is when they stop.  (I REALLY hate cute concept performances.)  The judges are mixed in their reactions.  Sun Jiayang gets the All-Star.  One teammate gets two stars, another gets one star, and poor Qi Lin gets sent home.  Sorry, guys.  You didn’t stand a chance, sharing that stage with Sun Jiayang. 

Next up are the boys we saw in the very beginning – the Dragon Boys.  This is the Taekwondo team.  They strut out onto the stage yelling, “Yo, WASSUP,” startling the judges.  Their leader is Lin Quinan, who has acting experience – he actually made a movie with Jackie Chan.  He mentions this to the other contestants, the judges, pretty much anyone who will listen.  Then, as soon his team does their first backflip, this egomaniac falls on his butt.

I do feel badly for him.  But he shakes it off, and later in the performance, he does the highest jump and flip I have ever seen on any of these shows, landing perfectly this time.

I can see the influence Taekwondo has on their dancing.  These moves are powerful and precise, and of course, those jumps are insane.  It’s the best performance so far this episode.  I rank it up there with the IST Entertainment group’s performance in the first episode. 

Dong Jingkun, whose rapping impressed Justhis, gets the All Star.  Zhang Shunyu gets two stars.  Lin Qiunan, to my total shock, gets one star.  What the hell?  Just because he fell once?  The judges say his expressions and gestures weren’t enough.  Part of me wants Lin Quinan to demand a second test, but maybe he feels embarrassed enough.  His team leaves the stage.  I’ll be rooting for Quinan to work his way back up to the top. 

Now we have two 16 year-old experienced K-pop idols, Wong Sikhei and Phoenix.  Phoenix is in a group called EASTSHINE.  The judges speak to them in Korean, and Wong Sikhei answers in English.  And, of course, they’re doing another cutesy concept. 

Their singing is a mess.  It’s a very fast song, and it’s like they can’t keep up.  I find it hard to believe they’re experienced idols, and if they are, they must have just met yesterday and just threw this performance together.  I think they get one star each.  We don’t hear the judges say it, but one of the trainees in the audience tells his team, “If that team got one star, we are no star.” 

After the next contestant gets one star over a performance that is best forgotten, we get a team from an agency owned by our Chief Master, Kim Jae Joong.  These two contestants will be performing in front of their CEO.  They are Sen and He Jiahao.  And their singing is awful.  Kim Jae Joong appears embarrassed.

Kim Jae Joong, considering having these two killed.

Halfway through the performance, Sen actually sounds better.  Unfortunately, He Jiahao gets worse.  When it mercifully ends, the CEO doesn’t even look up from his desk.  Sen winds up getting two stars.  He Jiahao gets no stars and decides to do a second test.    He takes out a guitar and sings a ballad.  Sadly, he’s just not a singer.  I think he’s tone-deaf.  The CEO delivers the news – he’s being sent home.  Backstage, Sen is devastated.  This is really hard to watch. 

What’s strange is that this string of bad performances is coming from experienced K-pop idols.  The judges aren’t being more harsh on them – their performances really are that bad.  The amateurs are doing so much better.  And now we have another experienced K-pop idol, Sun Hengyu from the disbanded group BLANK2Y, taking the stage.  Can he break the streak?

Sun Hengyu reminds me a lot of Lee Sang Won from Trainee A in the first episode.  After BLANK2Y failed to reach any major success and disbanded, the label kicked Hengyu loose.  He took a part-time job washing dishes in a restaurant.  Now he really wants to come back.  I want so badly for him to do well.

He does so well.  He’s obviously been practicing when he wasn’t washing dishes.  He can rap, sing, and dance – a total all-rounder, and the judges leap out of their seats to cheer for him.  When he finishes, Justhis actually removes his sunglasses to wipe away tears.  Of course, he gets the All-Star.  He’s the first in the experienced K-pop artist group not to embarrass himself.

Don’t get used to it, because we’re back to a bad streak.  We get the kind of performances that make me wonder if none of these trainees have real friends who could be honest with them and tell them to just stop.  At one point, Xiaoting tells one inept group their performance made her really angry.  Other groups are so bewilderingly bad, the judges can’t help laughing.

After a while of this, we get two more experienced K-pop idols named Lim Jack and Nian Boheng.  (I just thought of this:  Why aren’t these K-pop idols over on Planet K?  Why are they competing here?) 

Jack is known to all the contestants because he appears to have no filter, just blurting out thought that pops into his head.  Boheng seems a little embarrassed to be teammates with him.  They both speak a mix of Korean and English – Jack is from Australia, and Boheng was born in China and raised in New York.  I hope the fact that this show is focusing so much on them means they’ll be good and get to stay on the show.

They give one of the best performances on this show.  I think the other contestants were thinking that Jack didn’t have the discipline to pull off a smooth hip-hop performance like this, and I was right there with them.  They both get the All-Star, and Jack leaps with joy right onto Boheng with so much force, I worry he’s knocked the wind out of his teammate.  He keeps jumping and cheering around the stage until a judge says, “Good job.  Please leave.”

We have time for a couple more.  We’re getting yet another experienced K-pop group.  It’s Zhang Jiahao and Zhou Anxin.  Just like on Make Mate 1, everyone is entranced with Zhou Anxin’s good looks.  It looks like both of them were on that show. They’re performing “Fever” by ENHYPEN.

He Zhongxing, pay attention.  This is how you do sexy.  These two steam up my contact lenses.  I feel like I’m watching a very intimate performance, like maybe I should look away but I don’t want to.

The judges have nothing but praise.  They both get the All-Star.  I have a feeling one or the both of them will wind up in the final group.

This will be a tough team to follow, but BOYS STORY is going to give it a try.  We have Jia Hanyu, Li Zihao, and He Xinlong.  Xinlong was nine years old when this group debuted.  That’s insane.  The judges ask what they’re doing here.  This is a hugely popular group that’s been on the Billboard Charts and toured the world.  They shouldn’t need this show.

We cut to their initial interview for this show, and Xinlong is crying.  Something bad must have happened to this group to bring them here.  But before we can hear the story or see their performance, the show ends.

Well.  That’s two cliffhanger endings in a row.  Episode Three, where everyone comes together, should be a busy one.  Join me for that recap, and until then, in the words of He Zhongxing, let’s be sexy together!  Ew, wait, no.  Just be sexy.  Over there.  Away from me. 

Go to Episode 3

[catch-me-hello]

Boys II Planet, Episode 1:  Surprisingly, not a bad start.

Mnet is taking a different approach this season, and just a warning:  This show is going to be a LOT.  We’ll be meeting trainees in both China and Korea before both sides merge in Episode Three.  We’re starting with 160 contestants, the largest number we’ve started with on any of my recaps. 

Welcome to Episode One!

After an intense introduction that looks like the K-pop version of Lord of the Rings, we start in Korea.  The boys are arriving at the studio, including a 15 year-old trainee being dropped off by his mother.  She makes sure he has a juice box before he heads inside. 

The new arrivals walk through a dark hallway and find themselves on the huge set this show is famous for.  I like the new green and gold color scheme. 

Just like in the first series, the trainees will be grouped by the number of stars – 1, 2, or All Star.  For now, they’ll decide which level to sit in, doing a self-evaluation before the judges come in and serve them a big dose of reality.  Get ready for the initial performances full of off-key singing, off-beat rapping, and dancing like their bones have been replaced by Twizzlers.  If this is anything like Season One, there will be gems among this group, but it will take so much mining to find them.

Some trainees make sure they stand out right away.  Ryan is from the United States, and his loud, cheering voice arrives before he does, startling the others already in their seats.  They calm down when they actually recognize him.  Kpop trainees run in the same circles, especially since the trainee system is the only social life they know.

Ryan, a WAYF trainee from the United States

We pick up the pace as more boys come in, challenging each other for the top seat.  They arm wrestle, do push-ups, and in one case, full-on acrobatics.  Just like on previous shows, some contestants have debuted before, and others have barely started high school. 

One contestant walks in, and everyone loses their minds because apparently he’s a famous choreographer.  Wait, he looks really familiar.  And then the show reminds me that I just saw him as a dance coach on Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai.  It’s Yumeki the grumpy coach!  I didn’t recognize him because he’s smiling.  Is he actually competing on this show?  He’s already a professional dancer and survival show coach, even before Shinsekai.

Yumeki here and on Produce 101 Japan Shinsekai

There’s more intimidation on the way.  A large group enters, introduced as “Debuted.”  These aren’t trainees.  These are former idols.  For various reasons, they are having to start again.  And there are 19 of them.  We have members of VERIVERY – wait, did that group disband?  (checking Google)  No, they’re still a group, but it looks like they’ve been on hiatus.  Harry June of DKB is here, and it looks like he’s on hiatus from his group as well.  Members of MCND are also here.  If the young trainees were nervous before, they’re downright terrified now. 

A message flashes on the overhead screens.  The high-level All-Star seats are reserved for this group.  Everyone already seated there has to move down.  Well, that’s embarrassing. 

Yoo Kang Min, Lee Dong Heon, and Jo Gye Hyun of VERIVERY

Finally, all 80 contestants are seated, and the room darkens as the screens light up again.  Time to get these preliminary rating performances underway.  First, the announcer voice tells them about the groups from both China and Korea that will be competing, and that appears to be news to everyone.  They’re even more shocked when the screen shows them footage of the same show being filmed in China. 

We meet our coaches and judges.  Lee Seok Hoon is one of my favorites – he’s been on a few of these shows.  So has ONESTAR.  And we have a new vocal coach – hey, it’s Hyolin!  She was one of the judges on the first show I recapped, No Mercy! 

Lee Seok Hoon, Hyolin, and ONESTAR

We’ve also seen Dance Coach Baek Koo Young before.  Our new Dance Coaches are someone named KINKY (…okay) and Kany, who has worked with Michael Jackson and Beyoncé.  The Rap Coach is Justhis.  I’m not familiar with him, but the contestants are hyperventilating and keeling over. 

Time for the evaluations.  And these are going to be stricter than Season One.  Along with grades of 1 Star, 2 Stars, and All-Star, we will have a failing grade of No Star, and those contestants will be eliminated on the spot.  Yes, it’s harsh, but we’re starting out with 160 contestants in two countries, so we need to start whittling them down now.  We’re going to be bringing these two groups together eventually, and plane fare is expensive.  Justhis’ sunglasses budget alone is probably killing this show.

The Class Placement Match gets underway.  We start off strong with a group from IST Entertainment.  Their names are Kim Si Hwan, Rensho, Park Dong Gyu, and Arctic (GREAT name), and they’re performing NCT U’s “Misfit.”  They waste no time.  They don’t just start the song – they explode into it with incredible choreography and rapping. 

It’s one of the best performances I’ve seen on any of these shows.  I actually yelled “Holy SHIT” at my screen a couple of times before rewinding and watching it again.  It’s only the first group, and the bar is now set in the stratosphere.  I would not want to go on after them.

The judges ask the group’s leader, Park Dong Gyu, to sing without the music.  He sings a heartbreaking ballad in English.  That voice is gorgeous.  I think even the nineteen “Debuted” members are ready to pack up and go home.  But as much as the judges love Dong Gyu, they are critical of Kim Si Hwan’s rapping and dancing.   They must decide he has the potential, though, as all four members get the All Star.  We are off and soaring.

The members of MCND are up next – Song Min Jae, Noh Hui Jun, and Bang Jun Hyuk.  This group debuted six years ago and have been nominated for several music awards, two of which they’ve won.  They’ve toured Europe, America, Mexico, Canada, Brazil, and the Philippines.  And I’m still worried for them about having to follow the IST Entertainment group.    

MCND

Another confident, energetic performance.  In the audience, one of the younger trainees says to another, “Experienced participants are indeed different.”  Maybe, but this group didn’t blow me away like the IST group.  They were good, but they weren’t IST good.  The judges apparently feel the same way. They give Song Min Jae and Noh Hui Jun two stars, and Bang Jun Hyuk gets one star.  The other contestants are stunned.  These judges are NOT fooling around.

MCND decide to fight back.  We learn that groups can request a second test if they don’t like their score, with the understanding that that score might go up, but it can also go down.  The group requests the second test and remove their jackets.  They look pissed off.  They throw more energy into their brief second performance, but they’re still looking right into the camera, the way they were trained to as idols.  The judges are frustrated because they’re supposed to be playing to the audience.  Their scores remain unchanged.

Next up, a group from CUBE Entertainment.  CUBE artists have included Rain, Pentagon, and (G)I-dle.  Our two competitors are Kim Jae Hyun and Na Yun Seo.  And they look like they should be packing lunchboxes and waiting for the school bus.  Kany sees them and exclaims, “They look like they’re nine!”

I can’t help laughing when they take the stage.  In an attempt to look more mature, they’re sucking on lollipops like cigarettes and are sporting bandages on their faces.  It does not make them look mature.  It makes them look like they’re dressing as rappers for Halloween.  I want to tell them how cute they are and give them a handful of Milky Way Minis.

They introduce themselves by telling the judges they’re in middle school.  They say it with swagger, like they’re saying they just got out of prison.  The judges are trying very hard to keep straight faces.    But then the boys launch into their performance, and it’s really good.  Way better than what I was expecting.  Their talent is strong enough that they don’t have to try so hard with the image.  They can just be themselves.  Someone at CUBE needs to tell them that.

I must say, I’m pleasantly surprised so far.  At this point in the first season, I’d be seeing performances that would make my eardrums crawl out of my head, grab my car keys, and try to escape.  I know we’ll probably get performances like that soon, because someone has to get zero stars and get sent home, but so far, so good.

Right away, I’m seeing the language barrier problem I’ve been reading about.  Kany gives them feedback in English, and the other judges ask the boys if they understood.  All they could understand was that their vocals were stable.  The judges laugh at this.  I really wish there had been translators on this show.  The trainees on Shinsekai wear earpieces so they can hear interpretation and carry tablets with translation software.  Also, does Kany not speak any Korean? 

The judges give both of them two stars.  I think that’s fair, especially since I can’t help comparing these performances to the first one from IST. 

Next up, Jeonju Entertainment.  It’s only one contestant, the tall and handsome Kim Geon Woo.  He’s been a trainee for a long time and tells the judges he’s desperate to debut.    

He performs a fun dance/pop song, singing live.  The choreography is loose and unstructured, but I like his voice, and his expression is good.  It doesn’t wow me, but I think he’ll get one or two stars.  Nope – he gets the All Star.  I need to stop comparing all the performances to IST. 

Next up, ChoCo.  They’re a hip-hop duo, Yeom Ye Chan and Kim Tae Jo.  They’re nervous as hell, forgetting their introduction.  They keep trying over and over again and forgetting the words.    But once they start performing, their choreography is insane.  All anxiety goes out the window as they dance wildly with great expression.  They’re amazing.

I’m pleasantly surprised.  In the first series, we kept getting such awful performances, the judges started getting frustrated.  Here, some performances are better than others, but no one is awful.  The judges give both these boys the All Star. 

I may have spoken too soon.  The next duo is from FNC Entertainment, home of P1Harmony and SF9.  They are Chuei Li Yu and Kenshiro.  (Chuei Li Yu is the one featured on the show’s promotional posters.)  They start singing, and it’s not good.  They are off key and already out of breath from nervousness.   They can’t keep their voices steady when they sing.  Oof.  How bad will it be when the judges have to send home the guy on their own show’s posters?

I think the judges are thinking the same thing.  They struggle to find something nice to say about Li Yu.  “At least your pitch was right on the high notes,” one says.   They finally give both boys one star, and I’m guessing they’ll be sending a strongly-worded memo to the showrunners about making sure a trainee is All Star material before putting him in the advertisements. 

Great M Entertainment is next.  The two trainees, Lee Yoon Chan and Park Nu Ri, run out enthusiastically, startling the judges.  We get some clips of Park Nu Ri’s audition for this show, and to put it delicately, I think he may be insane.  He’s only been a trainee for two months and is beyond desperate to get on this show.  He yells at the judges in his first audition, and in the second, he throws a cup of water in his own face and loudly declares, “Sweat will fall from my face instead of water!”

This guy is going to ace his military service.  The army will just put him on the front lines with a glass of water, and he’ll scare the hell out of North Korea.

He might want to go ahead and join the army, because his singing is awful.  Not only is he off-key, but at one point he realizes he hasn’t timed a lyric right and has to rush to cram the words in before the next lyric starts.  He’s just not a singer.

The judges have nice words for Lee Yoon Chan, but they are blunt with Park Nu Ri.  They’re not sure he’ll ever be a singer.  Nu Ri responds by saying he’s supposed to be a visual, not a singer.  Dude.  Just be a model, then.  Even visuals in a K-pop group have to be able to carry a tune.

The whole studio falls dead quiet.  I imagine the other trainees are feeling insulted that this guy with two months of trainee experience thinks he can coast on his looks and get a spot they’ve been training for years to get.  Now I can’t wait for the judges to send him home. 

They give Yoon Chan one star and send Nu Ri home.  It’s the first No Star rating so far.  The duo pushes back and requests a second test, even though it means Yoon Chan might lose the one star he does have.  Nu Ri is delusional, and now he might ruin his friend’s chances on this show. 

Nu Ri sings a ballad, which just emphasizes how bad his voice is.  He knows he’s screwed when he sees how frustrated the judges are.  He interrupts them when they start to give him the second grade.  Fighting back tears, he says he was nervous.  He begs for one star, saying he will practice harder than anyone else.  This is getting really intense.  Everyone is so quiet, I can hear the air vents in the building. 

The judges aren’t moved.  The No Star grade remains, and thankfully Yoon Chan keeps his one star.  Nu Ri’s suitcase is waiting for him as soon as he exits the stage. 

Now I see we’re getting the string of bad performances.  I’m guessing the only reason they got through auditions is so the show would have people to eliminate.  One guy does do an impressive series of handsprings across the stage, but then the music stops, and his group just stands there awkwardly while the judges blink in confusion.   We see more contestants rolling their suitcases out the door.

The judges are starting to snap.  “Compared to buskers on the streets, you’re worse than them,” they tell one trainee after their ears stop bleeding.  Justhis yanks his ear monitor out during another performance to make it all just stop. 

“When I heard you sing,” Justhis tells one trainee, “I was reminded of a performance at Migliore Dongdaemun.”  The jaws of the other trainees drop.  Apparently, this is a sick burn in Korea.  I did some Googling, and according to TripAdvisor reviews, Migliore Dongdaemun is a late night, low-end shopping district.  Justhis was comparing the performance to a busker at Kmart. 

“Their standards are so high” complains one trainee in the audience.  No. No, they’re not.  These judges are being more than fair.  If your singing is awful, you shouldn’t be taking a spot from someone who deserves to be here.

Finally, we get a reprieve.  A group of five WakeOne trainees are here.  Only one is Korean.  The others are from Taipei, Japan, and Thailand.  The judges point out that the choreography they will be doing was written by one of the participants, none other than Shinsekai grumpy coach Yumeki.  Hoo boy.  Please be good Please be good Please be good …

Thankfully, they’re amazing.  They nail the difficult choreography perfectly in sync.  They’re clearly having a great time up there.  Even Yumeki gives them a thumbs-up.  Hsu Ching Yu is the standout, and he does another freestyle dance performance for the judges that is just insane.  The judges give him the All Star.  We don’t find out about his teammates, so clearly the show wants us to focus on him. 

Let’s hope we’re on a hot streak.  Kang Woo Jin is up next.  He’s just over six feet tall and very handsome.  He’s also a songwriter and plays guitar.  He performs a sad jazzy ballad, and I’m swooning. 

He’s nervous about his main performance because he says he can’t dance well.  Then the music starts, and okay, he’s not the best dancer, but his voice and expressions are wonderful, and I just want him to debut as a solo act.  The judges love him, and Kany wants to work with him on the dancing.  They give him the All Star.  He bounds happily offstage like a little kid. 

I’ve been waiting to see this next group.  The members of VERIVERY are up.  “Ring Ring Ring” and “Thunder” are my two big favorites from them.  We have three members here – Dong Heon, Gye Hyeon, and Kang Min.  Kang Min is the visual stunner of the group.  Kany actually gets a bit flustered when she looks at him. 

We learn that when they first auditioned for this show, Dong Heon had only been out of the military for two days.  The rest of the group hadn’t been very active while he was gone, and they’re anxious to get back onstage.    

They are so good.  I love this performance.  The harmonies are gorgeous, and their dance moves are still precise.  It’s hard to believe Dong Heon has been away for almost two years.  Honestly, instead of them staying on this show, I want their management to see this and get VERIVERY active again and ready for a comeback.  These guys belong together.  The judges give all three the All Star.

We have time for a couple more performances.  Next up are two trainees from GRID Entertainment, Lee Leo and Lee Sang Won.  They used to be in a group called Trainee A, managed by Big Hit Entertainment, but their debut got cancelled.  Sang Won actually left the industry and worked in a café.  Eventually, he found his way back.      The judges comment that they both look very nervous.  I really want them to do well.  They’re performing “No Doubt” by ENHYPEN.

They nail it.  They’re singing live while doing complicated choreography.  Their voices are smooth and steady.  They dance so hard, Sang Won loses a shoe halfway through it.  He mutters “darn” into the mic when he does it, and the judges get a huge kick out of it.  They both get the All Star.  To celebrate, they do another dance performance and absolutely tear up the stage.  They’re incredible.  These two were born to dance.

I can already tell I’m going to have my heart broken several times when these contestants who came in together as groups will get split up along the way through eliminations.  I want these two to debut together so badly, but the odds are against it.  The K-pop industry is BRUTAL.   

Speaking of which, it’s time for our grumpy choreographer, Yumeki.  Expectations are very high for this dance legend.  I’m glad to see he’s the one being judged this time. 

The judges ask him why he applied to be on this show when he’s famous and established in the industry.  He says he’s always dreamed of being an idol.  The problem is that he’s not a singer.  But he wants to try anyway, so he’s been taking singing lessons.

He starts by performing some amazing choreography that he wrote, but that’s just a warm-up.  The judges joke around with him, and the show is running out of time, so I don’t think we’re going to get to see his actual performance.  But the judges are concerned that he might not be able to sing, and in the previews for the next episode, it looks like that was the case.  The show cuts away before we get the details. 

We do get some preliminary rankings from the voting, and Yumeki is already ranked at #10.  The viewers haven’t even seen him perform yet.   Our two GRID performers are in the Top 5 – with Lee Leo at #5 and Lee San Won at #1.  Not a bad start. 

I’m glad I decided to recap this show after all.  Tune in next time, where we will probably watch our grumpy dance coach Yumeki crash and burn, which I’m sure won’t improve his mood.  See you in Episode Two!

Go to Episode 2 recap

[catch-me-hello]

Next Recapping Project:  Boys II Planet

I wasn’t planning on recapping this show.  It sounded like too big of a project.

I’ve been recapping survival shows for a couple of years now, and my favorites have been the small ones.  A small group of trainees with episodes no longer than 90 minutes.  No Mercy.  Stray Kids.  Hot Blood.  Shows where you can really get to know the trainees and get invested in their stories.   But I recapped the first Boys Planet, and I’m a completionist, so decided to recap the sequel.  And I thought I was going in blind.

I knew the name of the final group was Ald1 and Googled it to see what that stood for, and it’s Alpha Drive One.  That rang a bell.  I checked my K-pop playlist. 

I have listened to “Freak Alarm” approximately eight thousand times in the past four months.  I already love their sound.  I don’t know anything about the group, and I’m going to try to keep it that way as I watch the show, but I’m definitely more enthusiastic about recapping it now.

So join me as we go to China and Korea and deal with everything that drives me crazy about today’s survival shows:  way too many contestants and language barriers and flashback formulas and episodes clocking in around three hours.  But it’s worth it to find out how this group came together, because I might actually be a fan. 

There’s something only K-pop fans understand.  Finding out you’re a fan of a group and going back to see the survival reality show that put them together.  We are a weird and proud group of people.

Let’s do this. 

Go to Episode 1

[jebeplanet]

AND2BLE ✪ M2 RELAY DANCE

[jebeplanet]

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