#mod bethie

[d1x0nlab]

2/26/22, 3:21pm

i haven’t eaten anything and i don’t plan to.

the kitchens have voices in them that i am not familiar with, voices that i hate for that very reason. oddly, though, i’ve found unfamiliar voices can be trusted more than familiar ones.

there’s been a revelation regarding one of the subjects and it’s made me nauseous. kidnapping is punishable by death.

- orpheus

[d1x0nlab]

4/3/22, 5:18pm

i haven’t written lately, have i?

i cannot recall the days from my last insert. i theorize that i’ve been in a long period of dissociation.

no matter. i haven’t been treated oddly, and it was a welcome break from voices.

considering my mental absence, i do not have any updates as to current happenings, forgive me.

- orpheus

[d1x0nlab]

2/27/22, 9:58am

i fainted today.

i don’t know how i made it down the hall and into my office while my vision and hearing failed me, but i’m grateful for it. i can’t stand the thought of any of the doctors caring for me.

i am not ill, and it’s still early on in the day, i cannot possibly be fatigued already.

i was out for only a few minutes, but it was enough to drain me. i’m shaky and have a mind-numbing headache.

it’s fine. the doctors won’t know, i don’t want them fucking touching me.

- orpheus

[d1x0nlab]

2/25/22, 11:53am

i despise voices.

for years i’ve hated my own the most, but the more hours that pass by filled with the voices of the doctors, i’ve found the worst kind of voices.

voices that are tortured.

i first heard it in dr. lucille, the kind of person to have a tortured mind weighed on the tongue. i’ve heard tortured voices arguing and screaming in others’ offices. there are voices outside the wall, filled with a different sort of torture. the subjects are horridly tortured, it’s sickening to know that we are a cause of it.

it’s all so very loud and so very heinous.

if this isn’t hell, then i am terrified to know what it’s truly like.

- orpheus

[d1x0nlab]

2/24/22, 2:00am

my father often warned me of fallen angels.

he told me they live amongst us, banding together, growing stronger, full of rageful spite against humanity. they take your soul and eat your heart, huge winged beasts with eyes, eyes, eyes.

perhaps, can fallen angels be human? or can they have been once human?

- orpheus

[d1x0nlab]

2/17/22, 12:36 am

“for all evils there are two remedies — time and silence” is a quote i intend to live by.

it’s fascinating that i’ve already found myself to despise my allies and long for the company of the beings i am supposed to look down upon.

- orpheus