Sheryl Sandberg was interviewed by Nora O'Donnell on 60 Minutes and my mom wanted to be sure that I saw it.
Mom: Hi Daphne, If you did not listen to 60 minutes tonight I hope you can go online and listen to the second segment on there. It was with Sheryl Sandberg … Pretty interesting to listen to her talk about her journey to the top. Even with all her success she admits to being intimidated by mothers. She really believes in women's empowerment. It was really good.
Mom: Also why can someone as successful as Zukerburg dress like a common kid on the street but Sheryl who is second in command in his company has to dress in thousand dollar business suits? There I have had my say.
Daphne: I watched it online ... great interview! She brings up a lot of really good points. I was especially interested by how she still, as the most successful woman in America, feels "so guilty that she had to write a book about it." When are women going to stop being plagued by guilt for all the things we're not doing … and be free and content to do the things we want, need, are called to do? I don't see dads being plagued by guilt about working or not spending enough time with their children … or really, constantly feeling guilty about anything in the same way that women are. Do you?
Mom: Yes, Daphne, I agree. I wish women could love and embrace who they are, where they are and yet know they can keep growing and learning and expanding without always comparing themselves with others. It seems like women struggle so much more with that than men. The comparison trap is so damaging. It holds us back and keeps us in the proverbial guilt trap. We don't all have to be shooting for the same goals. Just enjoy and live in the present.
Here are few Sheryl Sandberg quotes from the interview:
"The very blunt truth is that men still run the world."
What about the women's revolution?
"I think we are stalled ... and that we need to acknowledge that we are stalled so we can change it."
Are you trying to reignite the revolution?
"My entire life I have thought I should hold back on being too smart, too successful or too lots of things ... women attribute their success to working hard, luck and help from other people. Men will contribute that same success to their own core skills."
"[Women] start leaning back. They say 'Oh I'm busy, I want to have a child one day, I couldn't possibly take on anymore, or I'm still learning on my current job.' I've never had a man say that stuff to me ... plenty of women are as ambitious as men. But I am saying unequivocally and unapologetically that the data is clear that when it comes to ambition to lead—to be the leader of whatever you're doing—men/boys outnumber girls/women."
"Do not lean back, lean in."
"This is deeply personal for me. I want every little girl who someone says they're bossy to be told instead, 'You have leadership skills.' Because I was told that, and everyone I know who is in a leadership position was told that."
"Everyone knows marriage is the biggest personal decision you make, but it is the biggest career decision you make ... partner with the right person because you cannot have a full career and a full life at home if you're also doing all the housework and childcare."
"The studies show this: husbands who do more housework have more sex with their wives."
"I feel guilty a lot. I compare myself to the women who are at home mothers with their kids. I think I'm a little intimidated to be totally honest. Because we all feel a little insecure about our own choices we get pitted against each other. Every woman I know feels guilty about the choice they're making, including myself. In fact I feel so guilty I wrote a whole book about it."
"I am not saying that everyone has the resources or opportunities that I have or that everyone's husband is going to wake up tomorrow morning, read a book and start doing his share. But I am saying that we need to help women own the power they have, learn how to negotiate fair raises, get the fair pay they deserve."
"The things that hold women back, hold women back from sitting at the board room table and they hold women back from speaking up at the PTA meeting."
"It is easier for me to say this—and that's why I'm saying it."
"I feel like I'm doing all the leaning in that I can do right now."
You can watch the 60 Minutes interview here. What do you think?
