#mortician steve

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Epilogue:

Days turned into weeks. Weeks into months. It all went by so quickly that Steve felt like he hadn't even blinked the tears from his eyes. Only, the tears had dried up in the last eight months.

A lot had changed in the last eight months.

Babysitting his nephews and niece more. Hanging out with Sam. Spending some much needed quality time with Natasha. Chaperoning Eddie and Daisy at a concert to a band that Steve had never heard of and probably wouldn't be looking up on his own. Accepting a few phone numbers. Even going on some dates that led no further than a polite, "It was nice to meet you," at the end.

Twisting his longer hair into a small bun at the nape of his neck, Steve went about his morning routine. Brushing his teeth, grooming his beard. The boring stuff that Steve's tired mind could do on autopilot. Which was exactly the way he preferred it.

"Ready to run?" Steve asked Vinnie, leading the way into the kitchen and retrieving one of the homemade mint dog treats from the glass jar. They weren't Vinnie's favorite, but he still gobbled it up in two impressive bites. Leaving his breath just a little fresher.

Shaking his head, Steve zipped Vinnie's jacket-harness onto his large frame and gratefully accepted the slobbery kiss from the Weimaraner. Smiling, Steve scratched Vinnie between his ears before standing and grabbing his own lightweight jacket.

"Ready?" Steve asked, with the fleece item zipped all the way up and clipping the leash to Vinnie.

The dog's tail wagged, and Steve took that as a, "Yes!"

Making sure that his keys were in his black joggers, Steve led the way out of the complex. Instantly starting to run as soon as they reached the sidewalk. Although it was February, Steve was glad that most of the snow had melted and salt wasn't needed due to not enough ice slicking the cement. It was extremely helpful when he didn't have to worry about Vinnie's poor paws.

Running their usual track to the park, through the park, and on their way home. Only, today Steve changed up their routine. Deciding that it would be nice to swing by for something sweet. After all, he had made some progress. Instead of just liking each other's social media posts, Steve had started commenting on some of Bucky's posts. So, really, Steve deserved a cupcake.

Breathing heavily, Steve tied Vinnie's leash to the bench across from What's the Batter With You. Figuring that it was a good thing that his breathing was labored from the run since it drew the attention away from his shaking hands. Which was greatly appreciated.

Since Steve had been taking his morning runs later in the morning due to the winter bite, he entered the shop no later than ten minutes of it being open. Internally, Steve mocked himself for seeming so eager. Especially after all this time later.

"Hi there," a thin, young black woman greeted from behind the counter.

"Hi," Steve breathlessly replied, stepping closer so he could get a better look. Looking over the red, white, and pink cupcakes in the display, Steve couldn't help the small smile that tugged at his lips. Directing his attention to the menu board, he was pleasantly surprised to see that there were three new cupcakes added. Although it wasn't Valentine's Day just yet, there were themed cupcakes ready to go.

As he read over the new editions: Rocky Road to Your Heart, Your Kiss Is On My List, and Hoping It's Not Too Late, Steve's heart stuttered over the fourth one. For a moment, Steve couldn't breathe at all. Feeling as though all the air ever had been removed entirely as he read: I Should've Said, "I Love You, Too".

Eyes roaming over the spicy dark chocolate cake with cinnamon and cayenne cream cheese frosting, Steve wanted to believe that it was for him. And while half of him was floating on cloud nine at even the possibility, the other half was desperately clinging to the ground to remain levelheaded.

"Steve?" That familiar voice broke through his thoughts, causing his attention to snap over to the kitchen door. His steel-blue eyes wide as he looked over Steve like he was a ghost. And hell, maybe he was. He sure felt like one in that moment: numb and transparent. Running his hand through his newly cut hair -- short, more akin to the way it was in high school, Steve had thought when he saw the picture on facebook -- Bucky asked, "What are you doing here? Not that I don't want you here -- because I do, I'm just surprised is all. Considering how things… yeah… You look good."

"I, uh," Steve started, gesturing towards the front of the shop where Vinnie was tied up outside, "Was running."

"Right," Bucky nodded and offered, "Vinnie can come in. It's pretty chilly out there and I can't imagine he's happy being out there."

"Okay," Steve nodded, agreeing as he awkwardly crossed the shop to get the Weimaraner. Not quite understanding why he was so awkward. Bucky owned the cake shop, for crying out loud, of course, he was going to be there!

Still, Steve wasn't expecting to see him. Wasn't expecting his heart trying to escape his chest to Bucky either. It had been eight months, and really, Steve had expected to be over the attractive brunet by now. Or maybe, hoping, was a better term. After all, none of the dates had dissuaded his heart from beating for Bucky Barnes.

When Steve returned to the shop, he noted that the other employee wasn't there now. The part that wanted to be overjoyed in the moment wanted to believe that she had left to give them some alone time. However, Bucky explained, "Shuri is getting some fresh pupcakes."

"Oh, he'll love that," Steve deadpanned, petting Vinnie's head.

"So, um," Bucky started but stopped almost immediately. Worrying his lower lip with his teeth, he kept his gaze on the counter before asking, "Can I get you a cupcake?"

At the mention of cupcakes, Steve looked up at the menu again. Eyes lingering on that one specific cupcake that he hoped was his, in some way. In any way. Chewing on the inside of his cheek, he approached the counter and looked over the display cupcakes. Bringing his gaze up to Bucky, he tried not to look away when their eyes locked and questioned, "What do you suggest?"

"Well," Bucky pressed his lips together as he thought and Steve briefly watched the movement. "Why don't I surprise you? You take a seat and I'll join you?"

"Okay," Steve readily agreed and headed over to one of the two seater tables. Hand still shaking as he pulled the chair out for himself.

Before Steve could even take his seat, Bucky was joining him. Setting one plate down in front of Steve and the other in front of himself, Bucky took his seat. Stealing glances of Steve as he did so.

"So, how've you been?" Bucky asked.

"Fine," Steve lamely answered. More interested in Bucky, "You?"

"Fine," Bucky repeated, fighting a smirk. Glancing down at the cupcake, Bucky confessed, "I broke up with Tony."

Steve wasn't sure what to say to that. He already knew that due to them being friends online. Not that Steve had been counting the days or anything. But it did take thirty-seven days after the night they kissed for Bucky to make a post updating everyone that the wedding was off and to change his relationship status to single.

"I know, I saw," Steve bashfully decided on, ears red as he focused on the cupcake in front of him. Chocolate cake with spicy cream cheese frosting.

"Yeah, I guess you would," Bucky good-naturedly scoffed at himself. Then, he chuckled and admitted, "I don't know why, but I kinda expected you to be more enthusiastic."

"Why's that?" Steve's brows furrowed as he studied the brunet in front of him.

Bucky ran his hand through his tousled hair while the grin grew on his face, "I mean, it should be obvious, shouldn't it?"

Steve's heart slammed against his ribs at that, and he softly pleaded, "Spell it out for me?"

"Starting over?" Eyes flickering around Steve's face, Bucky conceded, "You. Me. Mexican food. Maybe a movie. This Friday works for me."

"This Friday is Valentine's Day," Steve nearly gasped at the realization.

"I know," Bucky confirmed. Chewing on his lip, he confessed, "I don't want to miss my chance and mess this up."

Biting back his grin, Steve teased, "Bucky Barnes, are you asking me to be your Valentine?"

"Absolutely," Bucky readily answered, leaving Steve stunned just the slightest bit. "And I'm hoping since I made you your own cupcake, you'll agree."

"Which cupcake?" Steve wondered aloud, hoping that he was right.

It must have showed in his expression because Bucky threw a crumpled napkin as he confirmed, "You already know!"

"Wishful thinking?" Steve shrugged as he caught the napkin.

Playfully, Bucky rolled his eyes as he feigned exasperation, "What am I going to do with you?"

Grinning at the brunet, Steve placed his arm on the table with his palm up. Hoping that Bucky would accept it. Hoping that this was the start they both wanted. Both needed. Both deserved. After everything that they had been through, Steve really didn't feel like beginning again. He desperately hoped that this would be his last beginning when it came to his heart.

As Bucky placed his hand in Steve's and laced their fingers together, Steve knew that it was.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

"Pressing his lips together in an attempt to calm his utter happiness, Steve gave Brock's hands a giddy squeeze.  Especially once the pastor turned towards Brock and instructed, 'Repeat after me.  'I, Brock Henry Rumlow.''

Taking in a deep breath, Brock started, 'I, Brock Henry Rumlow.'

'Take you, Steven Grant Rogers,' the pastor continued.

'Take,' Brock paused.

'Take,' the pastor encouraged, 'Take you, Steven Grant Rogers.'

Brock nodded, clearing his throat, 'Take, take you…  Steve… take you, Steve --'

Steve leaned forward, urging Brock to continue.  Already knowing exactly what to say because he had been waiting for this day, this moment, since he was a kid.

'I can't,' Brock said instead.

Steve blinked a couple of times, 'What?'

Brock lowered his voice and repeated, 'I can't.  I can't do this.'

Leaning closer, 'This really isn't funny.'

'I'm not joking,' Brock assured.  Brock shook his head and gave the room a side glance as he clarified, 'This… isn't what I… want.'

-Modern Stucky AU -Smut and other mature content

***I don't own Marvel or the characters of Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes, nor any of the other Marvel characters

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Thirty-Two:

"You're right on time!" A black woman with fascinating tattoos on her bald head approached them. Easily accepting the boxes of cupcakes that Bucky handed her and led the way into the banquet hall. Glancing over her shoulder to the men, she admitted, "When I got your message this morning, I was afraid that you'd have to cancel."

"Oh, I'd never do that," Bucky assured, making his way around to the concession table.

Bringing up the rear, Steve was more cautious with his boxes. It had taken all day to make these, and he wasn't about to do something stupid like get distracted and drop them. So, he was slower than the other two. Not that they seemed to mind.

However, the set up caught Steve's eye. The rainbow colored streamers and multicolored balloon arches caused his lips to tug upwards. What brought the full force of his smile though was the couples already dancing to the live band. An upbeat jazzy tune had them all moving as though they were no older than teens, even if their gray hair and wrinkles said otherwise.

"When you said prom, I didn't think you meant an actual prom," Steve quietly confessed to Bucky as he started following Bucky's lead by opening the boxes of cupcakes.

"A lot of these people never got to go to their high school proms with the people they really wanted to," the woman informed. She shrugged a shoulder, "So, it's nice to give them this."

"Better late than never," Steve agreed, glancing over the prom goers. His smile growing as he watched two older man holding themselves close as they swayed out of tempo with the music. Wistfully, Steve longed for a love like that.

Redirecting his attention to the concession table, Steve let Bucky arrange the cupcakes on the five-tier round stand. More than happy to hand the reigns over to the brunet since he was the professional. Might've helped that Bucky was damn attractive when he was focused, too.

Eventually, Steve forced himself to look elsewhere so he wouldn't seem creepy. Choosing to watch the older couples act young for at least one night. Enjoying the way that they seemed happy, and hoping that some of their glee would rub off on himself.

"I don't know about you, but this is way more fun than my senior prom," Bucky whispered, playfully nudging Steve's shoulder with his own.

Steve glanced over at Bucky before bashfully dropping his gaze to his feet while he confessed, "Yeah, I definitely wouldn't choose to go back if given the chance."

"I would," Bucky dramatically sighed, then he admitted, "There are some things I'd do differently, if given the chance."

"Yeah?" Steve nodded. Even though the pair had grown closer and gotten to know each other better as adults, and Steve was fairly certain that he knew the real Bucky, he still couldn't help but internally scoff, of course, Jimmy Barnes would want to relive high school.

"Yes," Bucky confirmed, then admitted, "For one, I wouldn't have stayed in the closet for so long."

Surprised, Steve mutely arched a brow at the brunet, but didn't vocally question it. Instead, he let Bucky talk. If he wanted to, that was. However, Bucky, instead, extended his hand to Steve and suggested, "C'mon. Let's dance."

"Seriously?" Steve nervously chuckled while his cheeks heated. Bucky nodded and Steve gestured towards the concession table where the woman was still setting up, "We should get back to work."

"Nonsense," she encouraged, "Go, have fun."

"Thank you, Okoye," Bucky sing-songed, deciding to take Steve's hand since he wasn't moving, and nearly dragged Steve onto the dance floor.

It didn't take long for Bucky to tug Steve around like a rag doll. Bumping hips and shimmying shoulders in time with the upbeat song. Even wiggling his eyebrows to get a laugh out of Steve. For a moment, Steve even forgot about how awful of a dancer he was, and just let Bucky control his movements.

Then, on a mid-twirl, the song changed. Trumpets playing a familiar tune. Something that brought a certain nostalgia to Steve, even though he couldn't quite place it yet.

Before he could think about it too long, Bucky pulled him back into himself. Stumbling over his feet, Steve crashed into Bucky when he turned to face him. Knocking a huff of air out of Bucky in the process, and causing a deep blush to cover Steve's cheeks. Especially once Bucky placed Steve's left hand on his shoulder and placed his own hand on Steve's waist. With their hands, Bucky gave Steve a comforting squeeze before leading.

As Bucky led, he teased, "Ever thought you'd dance with the prom king?"

"No," Steve laughed at the situation. Turning it on Bucky, he questioned, "What about you, Mr. Popular? 'D ever think you'd be dancing with Steve the Peeved?"

"Peeved Steve," Bucky solemnly corrected. He shook his head, and surprised Steve as he said, "I'm really sorry about what happened back then. It wasn't right. And I'm sorry that I didn't do more."

"It's okay," Steve brushed off. Sure, that was everything high school Steve would've loved to hear. But now, as an adult, he didn't know what to do with such an apology.

"It's not," Bucky argued. Briefly biting his lip, as though debating himself, Bucky continued, "Ya know, I tried to jump in one time. Junior year. There were five guys ganging up on ya, and it wasn't right… I think I got three punches in before the principal got me. And since I was a, 'good kid with a bright future,' I was given a warning.

"When you got back from suspension, I tried to talk to you. See if you were okay. But chickened out when my friends caught up to me in the hallway. And I think that's one of the things I regret most. Letting that fear of what others might think, affect me so much," Bucky finally brought his gaze back to Steve's. As if he could get anymore genuine than he already had been, Bucky apologized again, "I'm sorry, Steve. Truly."

"I forgive you," Steve sincerely accepted.

A soft smile tugged at Bucky's lips again as he pulled Steve just a little closer. On stage, the singer crooned, "Never thought that you would be, standing here so close to me."

But Steve was more focused on the way Bucky sang off-key, "There's so much I feel that I should say, but words can wait until some other day."

Taking a huge leap in faith and a stumble into bittersweet, Steve brought himself closer to Bucky. When Bucky didn't pull back, and instead, wrapped his arm more securely around Steve's waist, Steve rested his head on Bucky's broad shoulder. Intimately swaying slowly to the music, Steve could almost pretend that this was his forever.

You'll never know how many dreams I've dreamed about you Or just how empty they all seemed without you

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Thirty-Five:

"Stop fidgeting," Cliff warned as he quickly worked to sew the hole in Eddie's suit jacket right at the cuff.

"I'm sorry," Eddie nervously replied. Seemingly using all his willpower in holding still even though Steve could see his fingers twitching, strumming at his thigh.

Julie shook her head, but the amused smirk stayed on her brown face as she teased, "Don't apologize, just hold still!"

Exasperatedly, Eddie claimed, "I'm trying."

"Try harder," Cliff commented, knotting the string and tearing the leftover off with a harsh tug. Turning Eddie's wrist back and forth, to examine his handiwork, Cliff joked, "Now, don't do anything crazy tonight and it should hold up."

"Crazy?" Eddie quirked a brow as he good-naturedly scoffed, "What do you think I'm going to be doing? It's the Spring Formal."

"Can it still be considered Spring if school's almost over?" Joe questioned, wiping the lint roller along Eddie's shoulders.

"Of course, it can," Sarah confirmed, licking at her thumb and about to swipe it over Eddie's pale, freckled cheek. Bobbing out of the way, he gave their mother an annoyed, slightly disgusted look while Sarah rolled her eyes and added, "It's the June-part that doesn't qualify it as Spring any longer."

"Summer doesn't start until school's out," Eddie commented, purposely avoiding his reflection.

"Technically," Steve argued, pushing himself off the doorframe, "The solstice is what does, and that isn't until the twentieth. So, it is still spring."

"Nerd," Eddie mocked, his shoulders easing just a bit. Only for him to tense even more than before when Birdie harshly hit his long, thin legs. "Ow! What was that for?!"

"Birdie, that wasn't very nice," Joe reprimanded while Julie warned, "You're at a two. Apologize, please."

"Uncle Eddie was mean to Uncle Steve," Birdie argued, moving her little body between Steve and Eddie as though she could protect Steve from him.

Touched, Steve ducked down and tossed the four year old up into his grasp. Her squeals melting into giggles as she tightly grappled for purchase, so she wouldn't fall. Not that Steve would ever let that happen. Instead, he hiked her small frame up on his hip and kissed her forehead.

With their faces close, he explained, "You can't hit people because you think they're being mean."

"Rich coming from you," Sarah scoffed, returning from the kitchen with the corsage and boutonniere box.

Playfully, Steve rolled his eyes, "Besides, Eddie was only teasing."

"Yeah, Bird, I was only teasing," Eddie confirmed, holding his arms out, "Now, can I have a hug?"

Tipping her chin down to her chest, her little fingers traced the faded decal on Steve's navy-blue t-shirt as she thought. Her lower lip pouted out in the same way that Cliff's did when he was concentrating, and Steve couldn't help but grin at that. Eddie looked less amused as he rolled his eyes, but didn't voice his hurry.

Then, as though she hadn't hesitated at all, Birdie turned and jumped into the teen's awaiting arms. Steve rubbed at his sore chest, only half-teasing as he smiled at the pair. Even once Julie warned that Birdie was going to wrinkle the slim, light gray suit if he didn't put her down soon. Only once the toddler went for the navy, coral, and white floral tie, did Eddie finally set Birdie down on the floor.

"Okay, let's get a couple of pictures," Joe started, holding up his cellphone.

"Dad," Eddie complained, theatrically tossing his head back to dramatically groan in annoyance at the ceiling.

"Edison Joseph," Sarah reprimanded.

Pressing his lips together, Eddie situated himself and draped his arm along Sarah's slim shoulders. Just slightly taller than their mom now, and using it to his advantage. Clearly enjoying it too, as a smug smirk tugged at his lips. With red-rimmed eyes, Sarah looked up at him as a small smile stretched her own lips.

"Need a Kleenex, ma?" Cliff teased, earning an elbow to the ribs from his wife.

"Might wanna be nice before your spawn pops ya," Steve joked, allowing Birdie to wrap her hand around his finger and twirl herself.

Playfully, Cliff rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything else. Instead, he stepped forward to get his picture taken as well. And since Cliff was, Steve did too. Taking his place on the other side of Sarah while Cliff stood behind her. It was their typical go-to stance as the three sons stood almost protectively over their petite mother.

"Oh, now I'm really going to cry," Sarah mocked as she looked up at her three sons.

"Geez, Mom," Cliff scoffed while Birdie aggressively shook her head, "No, don't cry, Mimi!"

Sniffling, Sarah waved at her face with one hand and gesturing for Joe to join them for just one of the pictures. As Joe passed the phone to Julie, he hurried to take his place on the other side of Eddie. Smoothing down the youngest's auburn hair before posing for the picture.

"Now one with Birdie," Cliff prompted when Joe and Sarah started removing themselves from the huddle.

Eddie actually whined, "Mom."

"Edison," Sarah mocked, earning a chuckle from Steve and a glare from Eddie. Sarah appeased, "Just one picture, and then you can leave."

"Fine," Eddie sighed as he lifted Birdie into his arms. Balancing on his hip while Steve fixed her navy blue and white polka dot dress so her Frozen II undies wouldn't be caught on camera.

Of course, once the pair started posing for the camera with kisses on cheeks and funny faces, it was definitely more than just one picture. Not that anyone minded. Eventually though, Eddie set Birdie down and grabbed the box from the Rogers' Garden Flower Shop, ready to go.

"Remember to call if you need a ride," Sarah reminded, straightening the knot of Eddie's floral tie.

"I know," Eddie smiled, excitedly bouncing on the balls of his feet.

"Hey," Sarah teased, bringing him closer so he'd have to look at her, "Be good."

"You mean, you don't want to have another grandkid?" Eddie joked as he backed away from his mom with his hands held up to show he meant no harm.

All the while, Sarah and Joe both exclaimed, "That's not funny, young man."

"You had The Talk with him, right?" Steve mocked as he gleefully followed Eddie out of the house towards his car.

"Must've forgotten," Sarah deadpanned while Joe added, "Was saving that blunder for you."

Shaking his head, Steve chuckled and unlocked his Lexus. Feeling lighter than he had all week as he climbed in behind the steering wheel. Sure, it felt like his heart had been put in a blender, but for a moment, Steve could forget about that. Especially when Eddie put on some pop-rock song and instantly started singing along with it. Steve could do this. He could be normal. He could be the happy big brother dropping his kid brother off at his date's house. He could.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Thirty-Four:

"And I just…" Steve trailed off. Lifting the floral mug of lavender tea to his lips in hopes of gathering his thoughts.

Across the table, Joe patiently waited. Reaching over to Steve to soothingly squeeze his hand. Knowing that Steve always did best when he wasn't pressured into talking about whatever was on his mind. And Steve appreciated that from his dad.

Worrying his lower lip as he set the mug down on the table, Steve placed his hands on the smooth light-stained wood. Finally, admitting, "I'm in love with him, Dad. Like, really, really in love with him."

"I know you are," Joe assured, leaning forward to rest his arms on the table. "I mean, it hasn't exactly been a secret around here."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Steve wetly scoffed, feeling more tears starting to prickle at the corners of his eyes.

"You know what it means," Joe playfully accused. Winking over the rim of his mug as he went to finish his tea. Setting the porcelain back down in front of him, he shrugged, "You've been…"

"Happier?" Steve guessed, since he had heard it a couple of times. Typically from Eddie and even Wanda occasionally.

Joe simply shook his head and corrected, "More yourself. Not so caught up in your head. Even smiling more. It was nice."

Solemnly, Steve couldn't help but agree. He had already thought the same. Of course, that didn't make it any less… sad.

"Not that we don't love you the way that you are no matter how or who you are," Joe quickly amended, taking Steve's silence as hurt.

"No, I know," Steve confirmed, sniffling.

Joe's brows furrowed in his concern and heartache from watching his son's heartbreak. Giving Steve's hand a squeeze, Joe wanted Steve to know, "I'm proud of you, Steven."

"Why?" Steve scoffed, leaning back in his seat. Crossing his arms along his chest, Steve purposely kept his gaze down as he admitted, "I fell in love -- and made out -- with a man who is engaged to someone else."

"You're human," Joe reminded with a soft chuckle. Scratching his hand through his graying hair, Joe informed, "I'm proud of you for knowing what you weren't willing to do, and stopping it. For far too long, I've seen you put your own needs on the backburner. But knowing that you're sticking up for what you believe in is a good thing. It's what I've always admired about you."

Blushing, Steve wasn't sure what to say to his father's praise. Sure, it wasn't the first time that Joe had spoken so candidly about Steve to Steve, but it still made Steve's cheeks heat. Something close to embarrassment and pride twisted in Steve's gut as he tried to keep the tears from spilling over his eye's rims.

Instead of drawing attention to Steve's emotional moment, Joe silently gestured towards the mug in front of him. Steve shook his head, letting his dad know that he could take care of them. For a moment, Steve wondered if he should go. Only, he didn't want to leave. Not yet. Yes, it was late. But he wasn't ready to take Vinnie back to his quiet apartment where he'd be so alone.

"You know," Joe started, stretching his arms above his head and offered, "You can stay in your old room, if you want."

"Yeah?" Steve asked, his lips twitching up just a bit.

"Yeah," Joe confirmed. As he stood by the light switch, he teased, "Of course, we retired your old Star Wars sheets, so I hope that's okay."

Pushing in his chair, Steve good-humoredly scoffed, "Please, they weren't even mine to begin with."

"They weren't?" Joe's brows furrowed in genuine confusion.

"No," Steve chuckled, "They were Cliff's. Mine were the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles."

Nodding as he remembered, Joe turned off the lights and followed Steve up the staircase. Passing by the old yearbook pictures and the obligatory Christmas card photo, the knot in Steve's stomach started unwinding. No matter how old Steve was or how long it had been since he lived there, this would always be home.

Pausing outside the master bedroom, Joe wrapped Steve up in his arms as though he was still that scrawny kid he had been before puberty. Kissing Steve's temple, Joe wished him a goodnight, "Come get me, if you need anything."

Discreetly rolling his eyes, Steve nodded and assured, "I will. I love you."

"Love you, too, honey," Joe patted his back before pulling back and ducking into the dark, quiet master bedroom where Sarah's soft snores could be heard.

Continuing down the hallway, Steve tried to be as quiet as possible as he eased Eddie's bedroom door open. Eddie pulled his phone below the comforter as though he was fooling anyone by still being awake, and Vinnie's tail started wagging when he saw Steve.

"Isn't it a school night?" Steve teased, ruffling Eddie's messy, auburn hair.

"Didn't you move out?" Eddie retorted, bringing his phone back out and placing it on the side table.

"Thanks again for picking up Vinnie," Steve scratched the top of the Weimaraner's head, "I really appreciate it."

"I mean, it's not like I do it out of the kindness of my heart," Eddie good-naturedly scoffed, rolling onto his back as he joked, "I will let you know now though that my rates are going up."

"Okay," Steve chuckled, shaking his head.

For a moment, the pair were quiet while Vinnie licked at Steve's face, and Steve knew that he should let Eddie sleep. It was, after all, a school night. However, Eddie broke the quiet, "So…"

"So?" Steve sighed.

"Are we going to have to find a new cake shop?"

Steve swallowed thickly, "Why would we do that?"

Eddie let out a low whistle as he shook his head. Steve's brows furrowed as he watched his younger brother, amused. Steve placed his hands on his hips and asked, "What?"

"You were right," Eddie yawned, "You really can't lie to me."

"Goodnight, Edison," Steve rolled his eyes, leading the sleepy dog out of the bedroom.

"Goodnight, Dad," Eddie mocked before Steve could close the door.

Only once he was in his former childhood bedroom did Steve allow himself to take a moment for himself. Letting his shoulders slump as he leaned against the closed door. Scrubbing his hand over his face, Steve took comfort when Vinnie's wet nose pressed into the palm of his limp hand. Just like he took comfort in the crisp green plaid duvet and the amount of matching pillows as he plopped face-first onto the queen bed.

Taking after Steve, Vinnie flopped on top of him, earning a muffled laugh from the man. As Steve shifted until he could finally breathe and Vinnie's added weight was no longer threatening to smother him, Steve's back pocket started vibrating.

With furrowed brows at the time, he wiggled to grasp his phone. Just in case it was an emergency. Because after all, who else would be --

Instantly, Steve's hands started sweating. Why was Bucky calling him? What if he's choosing to be with yo -- No! Steve couldn't let himself think about it. It wasn't right. This wasn't some high school fling. Bucky was engaged. Bucky should've been calling Tony, not Steve.

For a moment, Steve just laid there, looking at his phone. Waiting, as the minute dripped into an hour, a day, a lifetime, until Steve's entire existence was linked directly to the phone in his hand and the person who was calling him. Maybe Steve should've answered, if only to tell Bucky to lose his number. Only, he'd never be able to do that. Even just thinking about it hurt.

So, Steve did the next best thing he could. Which was to change Bucky's contact name and remove the picture of the stupidly attractive man. Then, Steve turned his phone off entirely as he rolled over and hoped his tears would eventually lull him to sleep.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Thirty-Six:

Pulling up along the curb of the Tudor house, Steve's palms began to sweat. He wasn't even the one meeting a date there. He was hardly even a chaperone. Yet, seeing all the teens and their parents and siblings around made Steve feel like the scrawny high schooler he had once been.

"Okay," Steve sighed, turning to look over at Eddie.

Eddie mimicked his movement and prompted, "Okay…?"

"Call me, if you need anything," Steve counted off on his fingers, "Don't accept drinks from anyone, and if you do choose to be sexual tonight -- which I don't agree with, but can't stop you from doing -- please remember to use protection. Got it?"

"Got it," Eddie nodded, a blush on his pale freckled cheeks and his teeth in his lower lip.

Leaning forward, Steve softly questioned, "What's up?"

Eddie shrugged, "I just… What if… what if she doesn’t wanna dance with me?"

"Then, you find someone else to dance with," Steve's heart clenched, hoping with everything he had in him that Daisy didn't break his baby brother's heart. Grasping Eddie's shoulder, he reassured, "But there's no way that she won't want to. Not only are you the cutest Rogers', but you're also the best dancer. You're gonna knock her dead."

"Okay," Eddie nodded, taking in a deep breath as though trying to hype himself up. Reaching over the center console, Eddie gave Steve a quick hug before climbing out of the car.

"Ed!" Steve called out when he noticed the corsage box on the dashboard. Eddie turned back to the car and Steve pointed at the box. Smiling when Eddie bashfully reached in through the window to grab it, and Steve told him, "Have fun."

"Thanks, Steve," Eddie grinned, turning once and for all as he joined the ground of teenagers.

For a moment, Steve just sat there. He couldn't believe that his baby brother was going to his first Spring Formal. He couldn't believe that his baby brother had a date to his Spring Formal. It felt like only yesterday, Steve was nervously getting ready for his own Spring Formal. Sure, he never danced at it, unless Natasha made him. But with the way that Daisy met Eddie halfway, Steve knew that his brother had nothing to worry --

A knock to Steve's window startled him. Nearly causing him to jump out of his skin as his heart aggressively pounded against his ribs as though it were trying to escape. And when he turned to look up at the culprit, Steve wished that it would already. Just burst right through his chest and run off with stupid Bucky Barnes.

Stupid Bucky Barnes who was leaning down, peering into Steve's window to look at him. An unsure smile was on his aggravatingly handsome face, and Steve wanted to both kiss him and run him over. He was just…

"Knock, knock?" Bucky asked, worrying his lower lip as he lightly tapped his knuckle on the glass.

Slowly, Steve rolled down the window while he took in a shallow breath and begged for his hands to stop shaking. Not looking at the brunet, Steve greeted, "Hey."

"Can we talk?" Bucky asked, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Um," Steve worried his lower lip with his teeth as he tried to think of an excuse.

Bucky hurried, "It's okay, if not. I just wanted… It's okay, we don't have to."

Despite himself, Steve wanted to know what Bucky had to say. He had, after all, been ignoring Bucky's phone calls for the past week. So, he asked, "What do you want to talk about?"

"Well," Bucky puffed out his cheeks as he blew out the breath, "I was hoping that I could apologize, for starters."

Although his mind was warning him that this was a bad idea, his heart was threatening that this might be his last shot with Bucky. So, Steve unlocked the car and waited for Bucky to cross in front of it and eventually slide into the passenger seat.

Angling his body so his undivided attention was on Steve, Bucky began, "I'm sorry. I was selfish and I really should've asked you if you were okay with doing… that. I know that it's an… unusual… type of relationship and not everyone is okay with it. And I should've asked you about it first instead of just assuming. So, yeah, I'm sorry."

Steve hadn't been expecting that. Not even after Bucky had claimed he wanted to apologize. Mainly, Steve had been expecting some half-ass apology where it went, I'm sorry IF I offended you.

Choosing his words very carefully, Steve decided, "I accept your apology."

"Really?" Bucky let out a sigh of relief. Steve looked over at the brunet then and nodded his confirmation. Bucky eased in the soft worn-leather seat and asked, "So, can we be… friends… again…?"

Taking in a deep breath that didn't do nearly enough to calm him, Steve knew that he couldn't. No matter how badly he wanted to. He just… couldn't.

So, running his hand through his hair for something to do with his hands, Steve shook his head and declined, "That's not a good idea. I just… I still… I can't. Now, don't get me wrong, I want you to be happy. I really, really want you to be happy and do what makes you happy. But I got too close to you, and I wouldn't be a good friend if we tried again right now because all I'd be thinking about is…"

"Us," Bucky sadly, quietly supplied, looking down at his hands.

"Yeah," Steve confirmed, biting his lip again. "I just… need time… before I can be the friend that you deserve."

Silently, Bucky nodded his acceptance. Tongue momentarily darting out to wet his lips as he stared at the dashboard for a moment. Keeping his attention off Steve, Bucky finally said, "Thank you, for listening to me. I… I'm gonna go."

Mutely, Steve simply nodded. Not trusting his voice enough to vocally say goodbye to Bucky. Hoping that eventually they'd be able to be friends. But in that moment, it was too much. Especially when Bucky climbed out of Steve's car and discreetly wiped at his tears.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Thirty:

"Now add the powdered sugar," Bucky instructed Steve with the cream cheese frosting while he made another batch of whipped cream frosting.

So, Steve did as told and added the powdered sugar.

As a cloud of white powder blew up from the mixer in front of him, surrounding the two men, Bucky switched Steve's mixer off as he amended, "Slowly."

Coughing Steve's eyes watered, as he choked and apologized, "Sorry."

"It's not your fault," Bucky reassured, "You didn't --"

Thump, thump, thump, the mixer that Bucky had been using started moving around unevenly as the frosting started taking on a thicker consistency. Muttering curses under his breath, Bucky turned off the mixer and blew out a huff of air in his annoyance and frustration.

Steve could only resist for so long before he was coughing out a laugh so powerful that he was doubling over with fresh tears streaking down his face. Amused, Bucky looked beside himself to Steve and placed his hands on his hips as he teased, "Did I miss something?"

Looking over the powdered sugar covering Bucky's face, clothes, and even matted in his messy bun, Steve couldn't help but to laugh. Loudly. To the point where he was grasping onto the counter to steady himself. And really, it shouldn't have been that funny, but Steve couldn't stop. If Natasha was there, he knew that she'd say he was love drunk, and maybe he was.

Maybe spending all that time with Bucky was finally making his head funny. Off-kilter with his infatuation. And despite Steve knowing spending all that time with him was wrong, he couldn't stop. Not now. Not when he was finally feeling more like himself.

For a moment, Bucky just stood there. Lips pressed tightly together with an unamused arch to his brows. Clearly waiting for Steve's current hysterics to end.

Which, of course, only kept Steve's chuckles from dying out. Even once the sound itself ceased, Steve's laughter didn't. Instead, he kept letting out these loud squeals that were quickly approaching a high enough octave that only dogs would be able to hear.

Casually redirecting his attention to the bowl of ruined whipped cream frosting, Bucky leaned over the counter to examine it. Scraping the tip of his index finger into it before removing his hand. For a moment, he just looked at it. Then, Bucky reached over and smeared the frosting down the slope of Steve's nose.

"Hey!" Steve complained, his giggles momentarily ceasing.

"Now that's funny," Bucky threw his head back and grasped at his chest while he loudly laughed.

"Oh yeah?" Steve challenged, peering into his own bowl of ruined frosting. Before he could change his mind, Steve reached in and grabbed a handful. Then, he threw it at Bucky's face.

For a fleeting moment, Steve worried that he had overstepped. That perhaps Bucky's reaction would be similar to the one he elicited from Brock all those years ago. After all, Steve was creating all the current messes when they should've been worrying about finishing up the treats.

Only, Bucky continued to surprise him as he tossed his head back and laughed. Still chuckling as he wiped the wet ingredients off his face with the end of his apron. Of course, that only brought flour, from earlier, into the equation and created a paste.

"You would so be fired," Bucky playfully threatened. Reaching into his mixing bowl, he grabbed a handful of the butter-like substance. And since Bucky was doing it, Steve decided to, too.

As Steve tried to figure out how to grab more of the wetter, yolky-textured mix, Bucky was splattering the other batter on his head. Good-humoredly scoffing, Steve cupped more of the soupy mess into his palm and flung it at Bucky. Not wanting Bucky to get too far, Steve cupped more in his left and turned to splatter it in Bucky's hair.

"You asshole!" Bucky gasped, teasingly shoving Steve's broad shoulders.

Smearing more of the ruined icing on Bucky's face, around his mouth, Steve mocked, "You kiss your mama with that…"

Cutting himself off, Steve realized that Bucky was standing dangerously close to him now. Caging Steve in against the counter with his thick frame, it nearly caused Steve to choke again. Chests still heaving from their prior laughter, Steve brought his eyes up; trailing along Bucky's strong body. Gaze momentarily lingering on Bucky's lips as he wondered what they'd taste like. Even with the gunk all over it. However, when Steve's eyes locked on Bucky's, it took everything in him not to get hard right then and there. Because Bucky was looking at him too. Looking at Steve like he was seeing him for the first time.

"What is going on here?"

At the sound of the woman's voice, the men jumped away from each other and nearly out of their own skins. Standing in front of the exit, a curvy older woman with graying brown hair looked over the mess with wide eyes. When she returned her gaze to the men, she seemed entirely perplexed.

"Mom!" Bucky greeted the woman with a shocked gasp like a child getting caught sneaking cookies from the cookie jar before dinner. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, Becca and Sweet Baby Nadine -- yes, you have another niece -- are resting," she answered, stepping further into the room, purposely not stepping on any of the mess, "So, I thought that I'd help out since Mandy and Teddy were holding down the fort at the bakery."

"Congratulations, Mrs. Barnes," Steve happily interjected.

"Thank you," she paused for a moment, then prompted, "Who are you?"

"Steve." By default, he went to shake her hand, only to remember that it was sticky and slimy with the gooey ingredients.

As Steve instantly dropped his hand back to his side, he noticed the flash of recognition cross her expression before she corrected, "Winifred."

Mutely, Steve nodded. Yes, this is exactly how I wanted to be introduced to Bucky's parents. Sighing, Steve looked around at the mess -- that Bucky was attempting to clean up -- and couldn't even imagine what Winifred thought of this situation. And since Steve had helped in dirtying up the kitchen, he quickly got to cleaning it up as well. If only to make it easier for Bucky.

And hope that he didn't blow his chance at making a good impression with Winifred.

"So," Winifred started, still looking bewildered at the kitchen, "How exactly did this happen?"

"Well," Bucky nervously chuckled, as he focused on wiping down the counter the best he could, all things considered. Was that blush creeping along Bucky's high cheekbones a figment of Steve's overactive imagination?

Empathizing with the brunet, Steve decided to take the fall, "I've never baked before, and I accidentally added the powdered sugar too fast."

"Ah," Winifred nodded, confirming that, of course, that was the catalyst. Peeking into the mixing bowl of the ruined whipped cream frosting, she teased, "Before or after you made butter?"

"Before," Bucky sighed, glancing over at Steve with a small smirk on his face. And as though he was trying to kill Steve, he winked at the muscular blond.

Steve's heart stuttered and he quickly dropped his gaze to his new task of mopping up the mess on the floor. Hoping that with his head ducked, Bucky wouldn't be able to see the blush coloring his cheeks. Although, Steve was pretty sure that Winifred had spotted it.

Working as quickly and competently as possible, the pair worked in silence. The same comfortable silence that they had maintained during baking. Well, before the happy accident that led to them acting more like teenagers than the adults they were. Even now, the pair couldn't help but exchange the occasional smirk or soft chuckle under their breath while they worked, all while Winifred tended to the cupcakes.

Once most of the mess was taken care of, Winifred clapped her hands and instantly gained their attention, "Okay! I think that's good enough for now. You two go get cleaned up."

"Ma'am, yes, ma'am," Bucky sassed, dumping the soiled rags into the hamper. Tipping his head to the left, gesturing for Steve to follow him.

So, that was exactly what Steve did.

[loveforpreserumsteve]

Begin Again (Mortician!Steve and Baker!Bucky Modern “Moving On” AU)

Twenty-Nine:

Back in the kitchen, Steve went back to his original task of mixing the colorful dyes into the liquidy batter. He didn't want to think about Brock, let alone see him. It had been six years. Six years since Steve had discovered the man he wanted to spend the rest of his life with had no desire to do the same with him. Six years since Steve sat crying in his living room trying to think of a way to explain his newly broken nose to his mom and especially how he'd explain it to Natasha. Six years since Steve entered into therapy for the first time. Six years since Steve vowed to never let anyone else close enough to break his --

Jesus, Steve rolled his eyes, I sound like a broken record.

As Bucky divided the new batch -- chocolate, it looked -- the same way he did with the white cake batter, he worried his lower lip with his teeth. The tenth time Bucky glanced up at him, Steve wondered if Bucky was ever going to, "Ask already."

The directness surprised the brunet, and he tripped over his words, "Did you, did you know that he was going to... going to... ya know?"

"Leave?" Steve supplied, dying his last bowl of light batter a vibrant green. Mutely, Bucky nodded. Steve pursed his lips as he reached back to the memories he had been trying to suppress for the last half decade. "Hindsight is 20/20."

"Right," Bucky agreed and weakly teased, "I've heard that before."

"I bet," Steve smirked. Then sighing as he settled, "There were little things that added up to big things. Honestly," Steve shrugged, "I should've realized it sooner. What with his internalized homophobia and how he never wanted people to see us together because of it."

Jaw briefly clenching, Bucky said, "That's just plain awful."

"That's not even half of it," Steve chuckled self-deprecatingly. Since he was thinking about it, he revealed, "I mean, for the first three months or so, whenever we were out together, he would still make it a point to pretend that we weren't together while he flirted on waitresses."

Shocked by this, Bucky just looked at Steve for a moment, not being able to do anything but blink at him. After a moment, Bucky stated, "Seriously, that's fucked up."

"Yeah," Steve nodded in agreement. "Of course, that's nowhere near as bad as the emotional abuse that I just shrugged off as, 'Sometimes My Boyfriend's a Dick.'"

"I don't even know what to say," Bucky admitted, "I kind of feel like crying."

"I've had six years to come to terms," Steve reassured.

"Six years?" Steve could almost see the way the gears were working in Bucky's mind. The brunet glanced over towards the front of the shop and vowed, "I'm never baking him or his family another cake."

Steve was the shocked one now and he quickly argued, "You don't have to do that. Really. I don't want to mess with your livelihood. I mean --"

"Steve," Bucky held up his hand to stop him. Steve snapped his mouth closed and Bucky reasoned, "It's my business, and I have the right to refuse that business. Why would I want a shitty person to promote my baking to his probably equally as shitty companions just so I can have more shitty customers?"

Worrying his lower lip with his teeth, Steve decided, "Yeah, when you put it that way…"

For a moment, the pair was quiet until Bucky sincerely asked, "If given the chance, would you still go through with it?"

"I mean, if not for Brock, I would've never met you," Steve teased, earning an attractive blush from the brunet that Steve immediately filed away for later. Playfully, Bucky rolled his eyes, and Steve honestly answered, "Probably. As sad as it is now, I was so gone for him that I would've eloped after the first month."

"Wow, even with him making you a Bro and hitting on women in front of you?" Bucky solemnly huffed. Steve quirked a brow and Bucky quickly apologized, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have… That was insensitive."

Steve paused his current task to really study Bucky, "Why are you asking?"

Bucky was back to worrying his lower lip with his teeth. And Steve hated the way that his heart jumped with premature hope. He shouldn't be happy about Bucky doubting his own relationship. Yet, the butterflies hatched from their cocoons to lazily flutter around his midsection at the smallest chance that Bucky might not want to marry his fiancé.

"I love Tony, I do. It's just..." Bucky blew out a puff of air, "He can be a bit... much."

Steve brows rose high on his forehead, and he ducked his head to focus on the batter in front of him. Pressing his lips to keep a smile from escaping. This was definitely not the time to be cheerful.

No matter how happy his heart happened to be.

"Like," Bucky continued, "He's planning this really elaborate wedding and I'm not sure if it's because it's the wedding of his dreams, or if it's just an expensive way to advertise his business."

Conflicted, Steve lightheartedly added, "Well, the man does know how to plan a wedding."

Bucky winced, but before he could apologize, Steve asked, "Have you talked to him?"

"I've tried to," Bucky admitted, starting on another recipe while gesturing to the dyed batter, he instructed Steve, "Can you fill those liners halfway?"

"Sure," Steve agreed, doing as told by lifting one bowl of batter and pouring it into the rainbow cupcake liners.

"The thing is," Bucky turned on the mixer, "Tony reads too much into things and I don't want him to jump to conclusions. I mean, the last thing that I want Tony to assume is that I don't want to marry him."

When one bowl was done, Steve moved onto the next. His heart was racing as he reminded, "As someone who has gone through this -- and ended up getting left at the altar -- don't wait to talk about this."

Bucky turned off the mixer and lowered his voice to confess, "I'm just afraid that he won't take it very well."

"Take what well?" Steve asked, "Are we talking about wanting a different centerpiece…? Or are we talking about wanting a longer engagement? Or…?"

"More like," Bucky wiped some extra flour off the counter, "I might be the Chapel O' Love type..."

"Might be marrying the wrong man," slipped out of Steve's mouth before he could think about what he was saying. His eyes widened once his mind caught up with his mouth.

All Bucky did though was chuckle; taking it as a joke. Like my life, Steve internally deadpanned.

After a moment, Bucky wondered, "Do you ever think you'll give it another go?"

Chewing on his lip as he thought -- and tried not to think about how he would run away with Bucky if he said the word -- Steve shrugged, "Maybe. Who knows, maybe when I find Mr. Right and begin again, I'll go the drive-thru nuptial route."

A large grin crinkled all the way up to his steel-blue eyes, "I think that's a marvelous idea." Then, he amended, "As long as I get to bake the cake, of course."

Licking some of the batter off his forearm, Steve confirmed, "You'll definitely be there."

"I see it's still true," Bucky chuckled.

"What is?" Steve asked, wondering how the batter had splattered and dripped onto him.

"The best way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

Steve looked up at Bucky then. Just in time to catch the wink sent his way. Blushing, Steve playfully rolled his eyes and continued filling the liners. Wondering if that way still worked if it was to a baker's heart.