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Until Tammy returns from her science trip to Arizona I'm keeping the window open.

It's Kami. No...really...just Kami.

That's right, it is four letters: K-A-M-I. It doesn't rhyme with "Amy". It does rhyme with "Tammy", but it is NOT "Tammy". It is also not Cami, Cammie, Cammy, Camy, Kammie, or Kamy. Although I have given up on the spelling as long as it is pronounced correctly.

And back to length: four letters, people. FOUR LETTERS. I appreciate that you think it must be a nickname because it's short. However, it is not a nickname. It's my name. The whole thing: just KAMI. It's not Camille, Camomile, Cameron, Camera, Cameo (although that is a pretty name), Camelia, or, god forbid, Camouflage.

Now, if you are my friend, you are allowed to give me a nickname. I happen to adore when my best friend calls me Kama-lama-ding-dong, or Kamarami. However, YOU ARE NOT MY FRIEND!!!!! I just met you. I told you my name was Kami. I even spelled it, because it is easier than the "Kami, Tammy?, no Kami, Tammy?" that usually happens. So get it right! My mother is awesome and creative, and named me for a girl she knew in school. Do not disrespect her choice.

My fucking name is KAMI.