Selfship NSFT alphabet: Bartolomeo✨
Minors and Proship DNI
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Incredibly talkative. Babbling, thanking profusely, weepy yet smiling as he breathes nice and deep, rapidly turning into a puddle.
He just feels so much for the people he loves and it overwhelms him easily. He is full of adoring giggles and free-flowing tears at the same time, but it's very easy to tell if he's okay from how completely clingy he gets. If he could glue himself to his lover after sex, he would, but instead he just whines and hugs them close, burying his nose in their neck and whining, "Haah, how are you so good to me? Love you so so so much, my sweetest, most precious heart!"
Even after calming down, he doesn't let go. It's so nice and warm and cozy, he needs to express his adoration and make sure both of us are as comfortable as possible - even if everything's sticky and sweaty. It's during this time especially that he's allergic to personal space, and he wants to talk about everything - he was sent to heaven 37 times, but can he do anything to be better? He'll do his utmost, he promises, and it's easy to believe such a passionate man. Will defer to whatever his partner needs for aftercare.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
On himself, he likes the parts he's chosen for himself - his tattoos, his piercings, and his hairstyle. He has a very particular style and way of expressing himself, so ofcourse he'll appreciate the things he's actually invested time and effort into. Not that he's indifferent to his body and his features, he's proud of his height and strength, but he firmly believes nothing is sexier than his choice of expression.
He adores my entire body, loving every major part and minor detail like it's his favourite sight. But if he was forced and preassured to pick just one thing, well, he'd still cheat by choosing an entire area, but he'd say the head. It's the perfect height for him to lean on, has the soft hair that he likes to brush, and ofcourse it has the entire face too - my teal eyes, my nose, my cheeks, forehead and lips... He loves kissing all over it, and it's without a doubt his favourite part of my body, just like the rest of it is.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
A steady leaker, it is actually obscene how much precum he can accumulate. It's runny but not entirely translucent, and tends to make quite a mess. Barto's usually too focused on his partner to comment on his own situation though.
His cum is on the thick side, but is not sticky and slightly translucent, making it appear like it mixed with his precum. It usually does anyway. It does spurt out of him rather quickly though, so it's easy to lead him from one orgasm right into the other. It's slightly bitter to taste, something he apologizes for profusely if ever commented on.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
I don't think this man is capable of dirty secrets. He pisses in public, he openly shares his admirations in terms of PDA, and you don't even have to ask him before he's showing you how much he idolizes the Strawhats. The slightest bit of prying will make him reveal exactly what kinds of things he's done, what he's into and when his last wet dream was. Honestly, the only thing that he might keep secret is how often he cries with excitement just thinking about kissing his beloved - but he doesn't have to say it, you can see his stream of tears from miles away.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Despite being such a cocky guy, he is quite intense to most people, and if they aren't pissed off about his attitude then they are surely freaked out by how obsessive he is with the Strawhats. He does know a surprising amount of info though, researching the subject and even peeping on others occasionally just for curiosity's sake.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Since he is so much taller than his lovely partner, he likes to sit or lay down to not strain them. Or atleast, that's his excuse, but honestly he likes it when he's shown clear interest, lust and love over himself, and if it makes it easier for his beloved to manhandle him when he's not towering over them, he can adjust himself. Hell, he'll restrain himself with his own devil fruit powers if it makes it easier, he listens so well and is so good, just tell him what to do. He's all over it every time.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
He's a bit goofy with just how over the top his reactions can get, from the loud noises to the tearyness to the immediate begging at any possible moment. But to say he's trying to be humerous is incorrect - at most, he can sometimes get giggly from just how delighted and honoured he feels.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Wildest bush you've ever seen on a man. Big, hair growing in all sorts of directions, never shaved - but it is meticulously trimmed and brushed with a nice happy trail to go with. Plus, since it matches his green hair, it really looks like a literal bush. It's surprisingly soft, and he clearly takes care of it, even if he purposefully lets it grow wild.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Honestly might be the most intimate and vulnerable sex partner in the world. He's very vocal in bed, and is constantly touching and kissing at every part of his lover that he can reach, worshipping them with all his being. Reaching this point of a relationship is important to him, so he goes all out in making sure he is overtly obvious with his love and affection.
It's why he stares openly so much and why he can barely restrain himself from mouthing at every centimeter of skin, locking and drooling over his love. He's not lost in the feeling entirely, however, as he'll immediately listen to any comment he gets. Faster? No problem. More kisses? Ofcourse. Want to try something different? He's already on it. His beloved's pleasure is his own.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Atleast three times a week, and gets hard at the slightest hint of arousal. He's a passionate guy, he can't help it, but atleast he has the decency to do it in a somewhat private location. He wouldn't have a problem with anyone looking if only he didn't look so vulnerable when doing it.
And even though he is in a relationship and could simply ask for sex, he just loves his partner too much and, more often than not, gets hard just thinking about their shared intimacy. It atleast helps that he's got a very clear visual on exactly who and what he wants as well as using a keepsake to ease him through it.
Besides, if he pestered his beloved every time he wanted sex he's sure he wouldn't be able to get anything done. It's why, instead, he takes suspiciously long in the bathroom, or stays in his room for longer than usual, or suddenly dips behind a corner in the alleyway if it's an emergency. He can't help it, he loves his partner so, so much.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Praise - an interest that runs deep in him, whether it's his numerous praise that he piles onto his lover or the sweet encouragement that he receives, he's ecstatic the sexond it's involved.
Body worship - if he isn't filled to the brim with adoration for every part of his partner's body, assume he's been replaced by a doppelganger. He just loves them too much to not worship them like they're the air he breathes.
Clothed sex - specifically when his clothes are worn by me. Seeing his massive coat drown out my torso or his large boxers slipping off my hips makes him rock hard in seconds.
Mess fetish - he tends to leak a bunch, both from his dick and his eyes, so seeing a bunch of stains on the bed is normal for him. What makes them extra hot is when the mess isn't entirely his, and he can see the physical evidence of how well he's treating his partner.
Inappropriate use of devil fruit - he's got the power to form an unbreakable barrier that he can mold to any shape and form that he desires. He'd be a fool to not use it.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
He doesn't want others seeing him submissive and vulnerable, and he doesn't want anyone to see his partner in all their glorius attractiveness, so he keeps to private areas, and usually a bed or couch so it's comfortable. That said, the location could be his ship, or some other ship, or an island - just as long as he andvhis dearest get enough privacy to not be seen. He does, perhaps, prefer it to be on a ship just a bit more though, as he is quite used to the feeling of ocean waves.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Lots of things turn him on, ranging from kissing him heatedly to him just thinking too hard about me. But to push him enough to want sex, it takes either a direct compliment, wearing his clothes, or directly telling him about wanting to sleep together. He's eager to please, and any of the three options will do the trick. But if there happens to be a combination of two or - god help him- all three? Well, a puddle may occur in his pants, but he's more than ready to go for a proper round, he just needs a moment to regain the ability to walk.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Hurting or degrading his lover. His brain genuinely breaks trying to even conceptualize the idea as it goes against everything he stands for, everything he believes in. He barely even dares to hold onto my body too tight or nip at me too hard for this exact reason, but to go out of his way to cause damage even if it's small? Unthinkable.
He apologizes profusely even just accidently tugging on me, if he actually caused a bruise he would genuinely cry and threaten to throw himself into the ocean. It's an instant mood killer, as he refuses to continue having sex if that ever happens, and behaves like a guilty puppy even if he's been forgiven a hundred uimes already.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He's a bit concerned over how large he is, but it quickly fades from his mind as soon as he feels anything down there. Kisses, licking, sucking - it all makes him babble and repeatedly thank and praise his beloved throughout the entire thing. He also remains quite still, ensuring he doesn't accidently make me gag. It always leaves him a bit melty.
He lives for giving oral. Sure he has to be careful with his teeth, but he's got his pierced tongue trained and ready - he adores the taste and texture, no matter what it's like, since it's his dearest partner. He's also an eager swallower, considering an honour and privilege to be able to intake his beloved's essence.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
He likes the slow and overwhelming pace, taking his time and paying attention to every single oart of the body before doing anything at all. He can't stand the idea of neglecting any of it, especially if he has to focus on just the intimates. Inevitably it gets out of hand, however, his pace becoming quicker the more admiring he gets - but when he loses it, he's more than happy to let his partner control the speed instead.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He's fine with them, and will certainly do them if his beloved needs to get rid of some pent up tension, but he'd really prefer if he had the proper time to worship my body fully. He feels almost sad if he can't even get to kiss every one of my spots, and so he vows to pay extra attention and give even more love and care later. And there always is a later, because he needs to complete his ritual or he'll sulk and sigh until the end of time.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Again, he's so deeply in love and enamoured with his partner that ofcourse he'll try as many things as possible. All the positions, all the toys, so many kinks and fetishes - he wants to know every single way he can make his beloved feel good, and he's not shy about trying. And even if it doesn't turn out as well as he hoped, he always knows exactly how to pamper his partner properly.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
He's athletic, but inexperienced, so at first he honestly doesn't last long, and certainly not more than two orgasms. He does get better over time though, and now he's managed to build it up to three or four rounds every time. It's still a bit overwhelming to him, but he'll do his best to make sex as pleasurable and unforgettable as he can, not to mention he's determined to always make me cum atleast twice.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
He doesn't own any, but he loves when his dearest shows some off. He enjoys using them, sure, as he's always eager to please and it makes for a lovely sight - even if it makes him antsy and want to just replace the toy with his body instead - but he relishes in the use of toys on him. Something about his lover using their own toys on him, for him, just makes him ascend to heaven every time. Though in his humble opinion, it always feels better in combination with his partner's hands.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He isn't really the teasing sort. He's a pleader, a whiner, a begging man before he even thinks of teasing, and so it simply never crops up in his vocabulary. "Sweetheart, please, need you so much," he whispers a hundred times, hands needy and grabby as he asks for what he wants so nicely.
Doesn't mean he minds teasing on himself though. Sure, it makes him teary-eyed to not get what he wants immediately and pushes him to try even harder, to be even better, to be so good, but he'll accept it. He's grateful for every scrap of affection he can get from his beloved, and teasing is certainly a rare treat he can relish in.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Oh so loud. He begs and pleads, babbles, praises and compliments heavily, whines, moans - There's practically no noise that he doesn't make. Luckily he has the sense tomuffle himself by either burying his mouth to my skin or by putting up one of his barriers in a soundproof form, but he certainly doesn't hold back from using his vocal cords.
"Have I told you you're the sexiest in the world? Yeah? Well I'm saying it atleast ten more times because it's true and you know it."
"Oh you're just- just going right there? N-no it's, mnh, it's okay, I just wanted- ah- to last more than two minutes..!"
"Fuuck, I can't take it, I can't take it, can I cum? You feel so good there's no way- I need to cum, I'm so- ngh! So sorry!"
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character).
When he got his barrier powers the very first thing he tried to shape them into was a dick. He was just a teen back then, he thought it would just be a funny impossibility, so imagine his surprise when the devil fruit listened to him. He panicked and couldn't unfold it into a new shape until the next day, where he started training with more typical wall-like structures.
But the curiosity in him got the best of him. A few months later, he tried it again and even used it to get off. Safe to say, he liked it quite a bit, plus it helped him refine his barriers into finer, complex shapes, which he considers to be an excellent thing.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
He's a large man, he's got large equipment. About 26 centineters (10 inches) to be exact. It's not all that thick, but it is quite veiny and seems to always be flushed a bit pink, most likely due to his size and build. It curves slightly to the right, and is most sensitive on the underside.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He's got a pretty high sex drive, fueled by his love and lust for his partner. He doesn't always act on it, as mentioned before, but he is deeply aroused by his lover so in an ideal world, he'd love to have sex five or six days a week. It's why he adores seeing his partner in the mood too, wanting him back as much as he does them, and is in their pants as soon as they say the word.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
It actually depends on what time of day it is. If it's from morning until six PM, it tends to significantly boost his mood and energy for the remainder of the day and leaves him wide awake. Classic nighttime sex will have him out like a light in 30 minutes however, as he is just so full of love and satisfaction that even the stickiest of sheets won't stop him. Infact, now is when he can truly unleash every tender touch and caress, wishing his dearest sweet dreams. And if he's cuddled back and told they'll dream of him? He'll cry and smile brighter than the sun.