Historic Event Unfolds: Madam Mayday Admits Fault (For 6 Seconds)
Today, at precisely 1:47 PM EST, an event of mythical proportions occurred: Madam Mayday—known across the payroll realm for redirecting blame with Olympic precision—typed the words:
oh ok I had not flagged that most recent email that came in that is my fault!
That’s right. After 2.5 years of unbroken managerial infallibility, the unthinkable has occurred.
Eyewitnesses report feelings of confusion, vertigo, and mild euphoria. I personally had to reread the message three times before accepting that it hadn’t been autocorrected from “your fault.”
Stunning. Historic. I almost screen-capped it for framing, but the moment was immediately drowned in the usual tide of micromanagement.
Because no sooner had she taken accountability than she began dictating responses to emails that don’t even need responses.
Here’s the setup: I sent an email to a manager asking them to correct a process. They didn’t reply—but they did quietly fix the problem. A clean win, right?
Wrong. According to Madam Mayday, it was now necessary to follow up on the follow-up—to send an additional message thanking them for following the process I already explained… in the email they never replied to… but clearly understood.
Apparently, in this office ecosystem, noticing and complying without delay still warrants a gold star email. Because when someone does exactly what you asked without wasting anyone’s time, we reward them with more emails.
It’s not about clarity. It’s about *quantity*. Communication is measured not in effectiveness but in output—preferably in long, disjointed Teams threads broken up into 7 back-to-back messages, each with a screenshot.
If I ever vanish, start your search in the email thread where I bled out from an infinite loop of pointless confirmations.