Apr 15
seen from United States
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(may 2025)
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(may 2025)
Do you ever just feel like you're a standstill? Everyone else is moving, changing, adjusting.. and you're just there? I leave in 80 days, and there's all this stuff happening around me, and I'm here, I see it breathe it and live it, talk about it.. but there's my opinion, the words I say; and then how I actually feel. Which is up in the air about everything.
My friend lets her 'boyfriend' cheat, use and practically emotional abuse her, blowing everyone who would do anything for her off.
My roommate's boyfriend, who is paralyzed, is holding up better than she is.
Everybody has their boyfriend's or flings or things, and I go through the motions, but the reality is that all these problems are gonna continue past my presence here, and the world is gonna keep spinning while I'm away for six whole months. So what's the point getting attached to the situations around me, caring about it? But if I don't then I'm heartless, so it's a never ending circle.
And I think mostly, I'm trying to detach myself from everything because as much as people say they'll miss me, they'll adjust easier with their lives here, with their friends while I'm going to have to adjust on my own. and really, I just don't want to be forgotten.