There are so many things I wish for myself for the new year. 2012 was wonderful to me and now my expectations are so much higher. Well, sort of.
But seriously.. I just want to stay home and be a bum all day. Why can't I be about that life?

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There are so many things I wish for myself for the new year. 2012 was wonderful to me and now my expectations are so much higher. Well, sort of.
But seriously.. I just want to stay home and be a bum all day. Why can't I be about that life?
my gf likes wedding planning and continues to talk about our future wedding plans (no proposals have even been made yet). she keeps changing the cake she wants...hazelnut chocolate i dont even know. and im over here like... honey, please mute yourself on skype and write it down in your diary for when i do propose to you, im trying to watch breaking bad here.
The world didn't end but you should know ..
You will always be my one and only true love. No one else in the world will ever compare to the way I have felt, thought, and consumed you.
Ugh... my grades are slowly coming out. Not making me very happy at all.
Someone give me a good shade of red lipstick, a knee length dress, a cigarette holder, and throw me out there to the late 60's just in time for the early hippie movement.
I would prosper.
.
While watching Madmen today, I realized something..well, a couple things.
So we all know that people have either approving or disapproving point of views on how homosexuals live their life.
Now, let's look at my main idea here. Each generation, each decade, each individual person man or woman have different point of views on their own ways of living life. Who are we to judge ANYBODY gay or straight, christian or buddhist, black or white for their choice of lifestyle? It's not about discriminating a group of people, it's about each individual person.
This issue isn't about equality. Actually, I dont even know what the point Im trying to make is. I'm certainly a feminist that's for sure. The revelation from Madmen was really from the episode about the housewife role (Betty) and a callgirl (her old friend). I mean, we CHOOSE to live the way we do because we want to. Life is self-determined and that has led me to think about my own life.
I am driven in my own ways. My passion IS succeeding. I've always known that I wanted children, a family, a nice traditional home. But ever since I realized that I was a feminist and a realist, a lot of my potential plans have changed. I actually don't think I really want kids. And if I do end up with a woman, I can seriously imagine just living in a small piece of property with our doggies. If I end up with a man, I do not plan to conform to the traditional housewife duties. He will have to learn how to cook and clean for ME after my long day's of work. And certainly from history, I can already tell I will be a workaholic so he/she is going to have to understand and accommodate to that. No, I'm not expecting a life of being treated as a princess. I just believe that too many women get burdened with kids and family that they don't have the opportunity/audacity to make their own life. And men just expect to be treated like a king when they walk through the door with food on the table ready for them. When I start my own life, I will NOT conform to these traditional household values. My lifestyle will be different and not traditional. My partner man or woman will have equal amount of duties and the stereotypical roles will even be switched at times.
My views will still change, I wont deny that. But Im making my own life and I expect to create it to its full capacity without specific obligations/burdens.
So maybe my main point afterall is that I believe in a life for YOURSELF. You don't live for anyone else in the world so the lifestyle you choose to live will be yours to enjoy.
I did not exactly hit a revelation today. Well actually, it's been here and there but today is the day I realized the actuality of what Im putting myself through for the following semester.
Ive always been one to take advantage of the many opportunities that come my way. And as I am debating whether or not I should have taken a step back a little I have decided that that is a stupid idea. At the same time I am busying myself with this and that, I am also living up my life to the fullest, even if that means I won't get as big of a chance to 'party' with friends or have time to do fun frivolous things.
As of now I have two leadership positions with a hefty load of duties to fulfill. I have taken on a program that needs 100% of my full time and effort. I am considering an internship position with experience benefits and nothing more (such as pay). And I am on the lookout for a part time paid position to help pay the bills.
No I am not insane. But I do worry for myself. Can I really do everything I aspire to do? How do THOSE people do it?! People with great accomplishments make me feel like I need to do more with my life. And frankly, that is what is keeping me on my toes. I just need a sign maybe.........that I can and WILL do everything to the best of my ability. No, wait.
I will.
Found the perfect playlist for my night/early morning cram for my lovely tres finals tomorrow.
Smooth jammin to bossa nova and sippin my green tea. All I'm missing is that 24 hour coffee shop conveniently not located anywhere near here and a hipster outfit.