Tony’s: Bacon Cheeseburger | Pizza Reviews | Pizzafork
“It all started back in 1960 at a little pizzeria in Salina, Kansas,” according to Tonys.com. “And it should have stayed there,” says Pizzafork, “away from the grasp of The Schwann Food Company.”
Tony’s pizza announced last year that they would be attempting to reanimate the lifeless corpse of a pie that they had become. They stated that their relaunch was an enhancement to their promise, “...established half a century ago to place authentic pizzeria taste within everyone’s reach,” as if they believed themselves to be some form of benevolent pizza gods, here to free us, the simple proletariat, from the shackles of overpriced capitalist gastronomie.
What Tony’s(®) didn’t mention, and never seems to mention, is their ties with the Shwann Food Company, makers of Red Baron®, Bon Appétit™, Freschetta®, Big Daddy's®, and Villa Prima® pizzas. A veritable capitalist Illuminati and wannabe pizza monopoly. Evil (Even more evil considered the chosen realm: freezecore. When freezecore is done right, the genre can succeed [see Pizzafork’s review of Private Selections]. But even a huge success in freezecore isn’t a pass elsewhere.).
“Pizza is a lot like sex. When it's good, it's really good. When it's bad, it's still pretty good, except for the occasional aftertaste of oppression that it leaves in your mouth.”
