sabanâs power rangers (2017) fic, third person, 904 words, rated t
character/team study, team family, team dynamics, 3rd person pov, canon temporary character death, implied/referenced character death, nightmares, bullying, family issues, canon autistic character, secret identity, aquaphobia ((kinda???? that one's a stretch but w/e))
[crossposted on ao3]
Sometimes, life sucked. Even with super strength, increased durability, nearly impenetrable armor and the ability to steer actual dinosaur war machines -- life just didnât let up, and it beat into each of them like a battering ram.
After Ritaâs attack, Sam Scott treated Jason differently: softer, as if he knew something he shouldnât. He offered Jason more leniency and he let him do, to an extent, what he wanted. Sam tried to be more patient but he still messed up sometimes, his short fuze getting the better of him when Jason couldnât tell him why he accidentally missed school or why he had so many cuts and bruises.
Jason hated abusing his fatherâs newfound trust and leniency. He wanted to tell him the truth, but he knew he could never do it. He could never reveal his identity to his father without involuntarily revealing the identities of each other Ranger, and so it went in circles: Sam lost his patience and took his frustration out on Jason, and Jason took it every single time.
Trini had it worse, almost, because her mother was a worrier and the most vigilant of all their parents, especially over her first born child and only daughter. She, like Sam, had too many questions Trini, like Jason, didnât have any answers for, but running away from them only worked for so long. Eventually Trini resorted to outright lies but they only worked so well before she was found out, and by then even Jason had to admit he had it lucky when it came to house arrest.
Like Jason, Trini thought it almost would have been easier to simply tell her parents she was the Yellow Ranger. The words rested inside her cheek every day when she finally returned home, sitting on the tip of her tongue every time her mother laid into her and her father just sighed and let her mother continue. She was always ready to but ultimately never could; she couldnât betray her team like that.
The team wondered, sometimes, whether Kimâs parents even attempted to discipline their daughter or if they seemed to believe Sunday detention was punishment enough. They knew she didnât see eye to eye with them, but they also knew her problems never lied with these disagreements.
Kimâs problems lied with her own actions. When life beat into her it was at school, and she stood in the hallways, every single day, forced to face her locker defaced with new slurs and jeers. She held her chin up and her chest high -- tried to remind herself she wasnât that person anymore -- she knew better now -- she would never, ever do that again -- but even that only worked for so long before the regret learned new ways to beat her forced optimism.
Zack didnât talk much about his personal life. He went to school enough to pass and worked enough to take care of his mother, but then he gambled his life doing whatever crazy shit he could (to âkeep thing interestingâ, he insisted). It was easy for the team to tell when the fragility of life caught up with Zack because he either sat motionless, stationary and quiet, or he threw his entire being into training and fighting, as if the putties represented life and he was beating the shit out of it for once.
And Billy? He didnât fight with his mother. He may have once dealt with bullies and had anxiety surrounding school but since his peers believed he knocked Colt out cold (and, he supposed, this wasnât entirely false) it didnât hold the same effect on him.Â
No, Billy didnât struggle as much as he once did. He had friends -- no, he had a family again. They didnât always get along, but that didnât matter as much as he knew they always his his back the same he he always had theirs. He knew he was one of the lucky ones.
What Billy did struggle with was nightmares. Every time he shut his eyes he threw himself back into the pier, water and darkness closing in on him and the salty brine of the ocean filling his lungs. He closed his eyes and he hurt. He almost wished he could trade the nightmares in and get the bullying back, if only so he could sleep through the night again.
It helped, though, that when life got tough all it took was one SOS text and they each would make their ways back towards Zackâs original campfire.
Trini and Jason both knew what it was like having overbearing parents, unreasonable curfews, and annoying-but-endearing younger siblings who asked too many questions.
For Kim, Billy knew a little something about turning the other cheek when bullies whispered insults under their breath or left threats on his locker.
Both Trini and Zack understood what it felt like to both be loners and outsiders.
Zack had first hand experience dealing with nightmares, especially those involving the death of loved ones, but only Billy knew what it was like to have lost a parent he was so close to.
They were all a little messed up, rough around the edges and unpolished on the surface, but they knew each other. They had each otherâs backs. They may not have consciously chosen each other -- no, the morphing grid chose for them -- but they became something closer than friends, perhaps closer than family, all the same.
I feel like I'm going to fly apart. I feel like. Like I'm being held together with spit and a prayer. I feel like I'm not going to make it. And I don't know why.
...Sometimes the things we feel don't have a reason. Sometimes the things our brains do don't make sense. And that's okay.
From the beautiful fic Submerged by @hollyandvice. I had a wonderful time reading the fic and drawing this. Give Hollyâs other fics a read too, they may be angsty but theyâre really good!!
please do not repost, thank you
trigger warnings for bipolar disorder, mania, PTSD, and blood
#project hail mary
#cats of tumblr
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