So this is not really foster care related but then again it is. Through the highs and lows of the past three years in the world of fc, I have had some pretty low lows. I felt like I lost the old version of myself and, without really recognizing as it was happening, a new version of myself emerged/is emerging. One whose eyes are forever opened to the impact of trauma. One who gives less importance to how the world views her and is okay with what survival mode looks like. And one who is still firguring herself out - yes, at the age of 42.
Twelve years or so ago, I was kind of in a rough patch, too. Single, living states away from family, and questioning a lot of my life, I found an outlet in quilting. The beautiful fabrics and rich designs inspired me and kept me thinking forward. After moving home, getting married, and eventually adopting my daughter, I found my quilting world packed away and my emotional state once again in disarray. Until recently.
I am not one to make New Year’s resolutions but this year I have set a goal for myself in an effort at better self-care: finish one sewing project and read one book every month. This might seem like a weekend project for many people, but for me it is an achievable goal that I am eager to see through. I am already feeling the old surge of excitement and hopefulness starting to reappear in my mind.
Today I finished a quilt that I started three years ago, right before our now daughter came home. It is made from a Moda fabric charm pack and some yardage I can’t even place because I bought it so long ago! I also finished this book my husband gave me for my birthday last year, “The Giver of Stars”. Month one - check!