#riptracie

[deraywrites]

Happy Mother's Day to one of my greatest teachers. My mother was a #Sagittarius and like many Sag people, she loved to live her life, loved people, and had a passion for adventure. This picture is from when we decided to go to Point Pleasant Beach one day out of the blue, just because. We all drove the 1hr 45 minutes to the shore and had this moment on the beach. She was loud, bold, and full of heart. Everyone who met her couldn't help but like her because that's the type of person she was. She love people. She loved living life to the fullest. And most of all, she loved her kids. In her 30 years of being in the role of my mother, she taught me unconditional love, being true to yourself, living your truth fearlessly, loving yourself, forgiveness, inner strength, compassion, and enjoying this life. Through good or bad, thick or thin, mommy will always be there. #HappyMothersDay #RIPMom #RIPTracie (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/BxYs2WenwKr/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=11p2ozmh2yvqp

[deraywrites]

Finally got around to making these homestyle potatoes like my momma used to make and how she tried to teach me. I added my own twist to it with some garlic powder and chives. Turned out pretty good. #manwhocooks #RIPMom #RIPTracie (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bt_j-M_nJth/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=136bgdr51uoz7

[deraywrites]

I had a dream last night. I found myself in a park. Everything was just full of life. It was sunny and clear with a gentle breeze. There were trees. Birds chirping. The greenest, lush grass you could ever imagine. Every step I took felt like a living shag carpet hugging my feet. I heard my mom's voice off in the distance call me. "Hey son, come over here." She was dressed just like I saw her in the other dream. Dreads pulled back. Pressed khaki pants. Brown dress shoes. Glasses. But instead of a white cashmere sweater, she wore a beige sweater vest with a red plaid dress shirt underneath. She was sitting on a rock and motioned for me to sit beside her on the other rock. I sat down and took in everything around me. There was a large lake off in the distance with some boats sailing on it. Mom hands me a slice of chocolate yellow cake. As I thought about eating the cake, I got a flood of memories of every piece of chocolate yellow cake I ever eaten, as if I was reliving them. The smells. The textures. The moistness. The dryness. The chocolate icing. The pieces of #Tastykake Chocolate Junior cakes my mom loved but I didn't. My grandmother's cake she made last Thanksgiving. All of that in an blink of an eye. I looked down and the cake was still there on the plate. "Why do you have cake if you cant eat it?" I asked my mom. "It's not about the cake. It's about all the memories of enjoying the cake." "Ma, how come you keep showing up to me all dressed up?" "It was initially for you to see me "evolved". I can go back to how you knew me." Just then, she was wearing grey sweatpants, a white tshirt, and white sneakers. Her hair was in cornrows now. Then we had a long discussion about living our truth, personal power, being authentic, God's unconditional love and how we should reflect that to others as well as ourselves, freedom and what she learned about that as a bisexual black woman who wore men's clothes sometimes. "You know why both men and women liked me? Cuz I truly enjoyed my energy and people couldnt help but notice that." I looked away and the sun was setting on the lake over horizon. Then I woke up. #RIPMom #RIPTracie #Dreams #StoryOfMyLife (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/BqpfrpgnRSD/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=i8m1b0e199a1

[deraywrites]

I found my mom's can of coffee this morning. I remember her asking me "Did I leave a can of coffee over your house?" "No, ma, I don't see it. I'll let you know if I find it." "I coulda sworn I left it over there." she said. Well ma, guess who found your coffee? LOL What should I do with it now? #RIPMom #RIPTracie #foodforthought #StoryOfMyLife #ChockFullONuts #ChockFullOMemories #coffee #coffeedrinkers (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/BqpOaS2nukV/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=e270peextz3j

[deraywrites]

There's a specific spot in a hallway of my apartment right now that smells strongly of #Lavender #Fabuloso & #Mistolin I only know of this smell because my mom was almost OCD with cleaning with this stuff. I only smell this in this one particular spot in the hallway and I haven't used anything like this in the home recently. It is a really strong aroma like if someone just finished scrubbing this hallway on their hands and knees. Is my mom trying to nag me from the Other Side to clean up? LOL #RIPMom #RIPTracie #foodforthought (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqkr7UbHG1k/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=twrjqh12wiw3

[deraywrites]

I had a dream last night. I was walking around an old apartment I lived in with my mom. I couldn't see her but I heard her voice and felt her presence, kinda like she was behind me. The apartment was empty as if someone was just about to move in or someone just moved out. Nothing but white walls and hardwood floors. She was explaining to me that she can see the paths and possibile outcomes of every potential decision she made or was involved with. "So you could see what would've happened if we didn't moved from this place or if we had stayed in the apartment longer than we did?" I asked her. "Yup, just like I'm watching a 3D movie."she said. "I can switch between different possible outcomes or timelines like I was sitting on the couch watching TV." Then we talked about some personal matters that's too long to talk about here. "You must have gotten a lot of perspective on things Ma" "Yeah, and its why I'm not as bothered about things as I used to be. Everything, everyone, has a reason, purpose, even when we were frustrated as hell because we don't understand it right now." Then she played that #MaryMary song #Yesterday and I woke up. #Dreams #DreamInterpretation #RIPTracie #RIPMom #StoryOfMyLife #Psychic #Medium #ConversationsWithTheOtherSide #foodforthought #BoxingWithGod (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/Bqkpiehnd0v/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=18q2bq16mwz2e

[deraywrites]

Thinking about my momma... #RIPTracie https://www.instagram.com/p/BnvEordhjm4/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=rk2hf8hkq6x4

[deraywrites]

Boxing With God: The Power of Anointing, Part 98: Do You Believe In Miracles? Shout out to my mother for coming through for me and helping me out from across the veil today. I had a real stressful situation I was dealing with for a while. I tried everything I could to pull myself out of it but nothing seemed to work. Every time I progressed a step forward, suddenly I found myself going two, three steps back. After putting so much time, work, and energy into trying to achieve something and only ending up with nothing to show for it, I was ready to throw in the towel. Everyone I asked for help, couldn't help me for one reason or another. I was all kinds of frustrated, exhausted, and lonely. I felt like all I had was me, myself, and God. And I prayed during the night of the #PiscesFullMoon for a miracle to work in my favor. The next day, as I'm checking my emails, I heard my mom's voice in the back of my head, well, more like a she telepathically sent me an idea. I chose to listen to her and turns out Mom was right! Everything's working out! Today made me think of this photo from when I was 6 or 7 years old. I was helping my mom carry groceries back then. Now, she's helping me carry my bags. Isn't it funny how everything comes back around? This is how I like to picture our relationship now. You cant see my mom directly in this picture but yet she's still there. I cant see my mom directly but yet I know she's still here. #StoryOfMyLife #foodforthought #RIPTracie #BoxingWithGod #ThePowerOfAnointing #RIPMom #Miracles #BeyondTheVeil #LifeAfterDeath #MotherAndSon (at New Jersey) https://www.instagram.com/p/BnAvViUAoNn/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=5ug4vlkhrgmg