It is done. The 17th annual #vigil for #RobertWilliam is over. 17 years ago, today, was easily the worst and one of the most transformative years of my life as our son, our "Twin A," gained his angel wings. 👼 . Right now, the US, along with pretty much the entire globe, is fighting WWIII in the name of #COVID19, the novel #coronavirus. Many people are self-isolating at home - that is, if they're not already under strict #quarantine. 👼 . Streets are empty. People aren't coming or going in cars or on foot; I don't even ever see anyone checking their mail. No one's at the few shops that are open. Kids are home from school. The world has, essentially, entirely shut down. 👼 . If you have seen this phenomenon as well, if you are seeing this in your daily lives right now, then you have a very good approximation for what I expected the world to do after March 25, 2003. 👼 . That was the day my son died. 👼 . Once that indescribable day had passed, many related events, comments, and behaviors became indelible on my memory. One such thing was that I'd step out on my front stoop, completely expecting the world to have stopped like it is here in 2020 - because mine certainly had! - but it had not. People were checking their mail. People were driving home from work or to go get groceries. Dogs were being walked by cheerful owners. 👼 . In my mind, I was screaming: "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! HOW CAN YOU CARRY ON AS THOUGH NOTHING HAD HAPPENED?!" I would honestly look out my front door in complete bewilderment that the world was still revolving and folks could still be smiling and whistling, even though I was not even able to breathe from the sheer force of the gut kick that losing a child really is. 👼 . My mono-di #identicaltwins, Robby and #JackRiver, had developed #TwinTwinTransfusionSyndrome - aka #TTTS - wherein a placental problem causes the fluids and nutrients of one twin called the "donor twin" (our Jack) to be shunted over to the "recipient twin" (Robby). In our case of TTTS, it was a very rare form that developed very rapidly during the labor and delivery itself. 👼 . When I went into #pretermlabor at 30 weeks, there was NO significant difference in (more) (at Naval Medical Center Portsmouth) https://www.instagram.com/p/B-KuiZKnzOR/?igshid=12t9qpr1i6tty