the end of the competition was drawing near, and though this would have normally frightened her, dawon couldn’t help but feel a hint of excitement. it had less to do with the fact that the end was coming, however, and more to do with the current challenge that the girls had each been faced with. the acting challenge presented dawon with an opportunity to show jisub that she was capable of more than just singing, and she had absolutely no intention of wasting it.
they were only given half an hour to film, meaning that there was almost no room for error. dawon had to hope that her hour spent rehearsing with noh jihoon had been well spent, and that they’d be capable of showing a decent amount of chemistry in front of the cameras. dawon tried to imagine herself in a familiar location, hoping that it’d help her to feel more at home—she imagined that she was back at the theater, and that this was nothing more than one more play to act in before beginning her career as an idol.
once everything was ready and the filming had begun, dawon didn’t hesitate before she was already acting out the scene. things would have been much easier if she had only been tasked with packing a suitcase, but dawon knew that there was much more to the scene than that. she was acting with nothing but emotion, relying on nothing but her facial expressions to tell the audience how her character was feeling.
the couple moments left a bitter taste in dawon’s mouth as she was reminded yet again of the fact she had never been in an official relationship, but she certainly didn’t let it show. this was about showcasing the emotions of her character, not herself. even if it wasn’t the most healthy approach for dawon to take with method acting, she found herself imagining that noh jihoon was yoo jiae, hoping that it would help her to exhibit genuine emotions rather delivering a flat performance. it worked, to an extent, though it also brought a fair amount of pain, as it only made her memories with jiae that much more recent in her mind.
the emotional break-up. it was a confrontation she hadn’t had the chance to have with jiae, though it wasn’t too difficult to imagine how she would have acted in such a situation (as she’d dealt with most of their ‘break-up’ on her own). her experience with jiae wasn’t the only thing that helped dawon with putting her heart into the performance, however. she also found herself remembering her confrontation with taeha all those years ago, the argument they’d shared along with emotional farewells standing out crystal clear in dawon’s memory.
thinking of jiae’s departure one last time, the tears came more naturally than she’d like to admit.
soojung knows that she doesn't want to be eliminated but.. ever since being on the royal survival show, there's a lot that she needs to work on. the french gal was cut off from the last episode because of her poor health, balancing her studies while trying to remain in the spotlight as an upcoming idol is not an easy task.she's always felt that school came first before anything, but she's stressing out over being eliminated and possibly her grades lowering down.
what if being an idol doesn't work out? what if everything turns out for the best? she's been thinking for the past few days. overthinking, if you'd say. that's what she does best, contemplating her whole life and the picture in one go but not seeing the corners and edges, the little details that could make her happy. soojung only pays attention to the worst outcome. she felt as if she should've been gone a couple episodes ago, but she's still here and ( even if she doesn't want to admit it ) strong.
she misses the sphere building, seeing her fellow co-trainees and her lover, oh sehun but she has to cope up with what she signed up for. if she doesn't finish, then she can say that she's given everything throughout the show.
everything’s going to be okay, she assures herself.
there's the good and the bad, the worse and the fun. she's going to have fun trying out acting for the first time. this isn't what she's used to, but she's creative. always had been, maybe she can show off herself in ways that most others can't. soojung's already failed at that, people expecting her to sing ballads but she's all around confused.
what does so jisub want from her anyway? she's unsure, truly. would her image fit within the group and their dynamics?
lights, camera, action.
the scene starts off as she packs her stuff, dumping in all her clothes from the closet and into the suitcase. surprising how everything seems to fit in one thing, but she has to make the feeling of agitation stern on her features. which she excels at, she doesn't look too mellow or happy at all. she doesn't speak to jihoon. only to let herself take the leave. then another take starts, it's strange having someone else that's not her boyfriend act like her lover but she goes with the flow. thinking of the good times, the replay of the girl who's the whole world now turned against her. she's lost in the maze and the love's out of her grasp.
the final part is having to break down, tear up and get on her knees. which she does, bring herself to, getting on her knees as she plays the role of the girl, who's going through a tough time with her relationship only having to end it as a source of an outcome. the tears stream down, they're somewhat genuine because she's done it multiple times to sehun, threatening him on the occasion to leave. the harsh words of we need to break up get convey, even through her features.
maybe a part of her has already lost someone so important.
royal 👑 survival acting challenge (episode 6)
acting out scenes from sg wannabe’s one spring day
featuring noh jihoon
she’s the third one to go, after elly and seoyoung. she’s too focused on trying to remember noh jihoon’s advice to really notice how upset elly was after finishing her scenes, but she does wonder if she’s alright. she thinks maybe the acting got a little too real for a second and almost hopes this could happen to her during the breakup scene, then maybe, just maybe, she would ace this. it’s highly unlikely, though, since she can’t think of anything sad enough to trigger real tears. she’s just not someone who usually cries, no matter how upset she gets. she’s not sure she could remember the last time she did, actually.
“think of me as someone you like. then imagine, if you were to lose that person. how would that make you feel?” she recalls jihoon asking the previous day. her answer was ‘angry, lost’. but knowing about it and having it show through her facial expressions and body language was a lot more different than just saying it outright. she’s restless in the waiting room as people work on her hair and makeup, unable to escape the feeling of doom hanging above her head. would so jisub eliminate her just because she has no acting experience? is it really that important for an idol to be able to master a breakup scene? how is she even supposed to know how to act something she’s never even experienced… it’s all too weird. she’s never been in such a serious relationship before.
once her turns comes, eunae walks onto the set seemingly confident, smiling at her co-lead for a day and getting ready to film the first scene. she somehow gets through the first two blocks without too much trouble. she’s been upset before, mostly with her siblings, so she only has to think of her fights with grace and that one time as a child where she did pack up a suitcase and walked out the door for a whole five minutes before coming back to use the bathroom. this might have nothing to do with a couple’s fight, but the feeling is similar.
the sweet, couple moments aren’t easy. nothing about acting comes easily to eunae, as proven by this episode’s challenge, but happiness and playfulness come naturally to her. so it’s not exactly acting. she just plasters sooah’s face onto jihoon’s and pretends she’s sharing those moments with her instead. holding up the statue to her face, she makes a couple of funny faces which make jihoon (or at least his character) smile. the hug is warm, comforting, as it should be when you love someone, she guesses. but the loving gazes he gives her actually manage to make her heart flutter. he must be damn good at his job, because he genuinely looks like he’s going to ask her out on a date as soon as the filming is done. eunae replies to those with more convinction than she did during practice because this time, it looks real. it feels real.
the tricky part comes last, as they reach the breakup scene. they did practice this one the most yesterday, jihoon doing his best to coach her through it all. still, with only a few days of practice, eunae has no idea how to fake that type of sadness. breaking up is a foreign concept to her. she’s never had a real, painful ‘first love’. in fact, she’s never been in love before. so she can’t possibly imagine how someone would feel when they lose such a precious person. but she has to try, and give it her best, so she jumps into the scene as if her life depends on it, mentally cursing all the survival girls talented in acting.
it starts out with eunae freaking out over something. now that is something that’s not totally out of character, she did have breakdowns before. “don’t go!” she clings to noh jihoon’s arm to keep him from leaving, but he takes her hand off, lets it go, then storms off. eunae can’t help but wonder why the male lead is being such an idiot when clearly he regrets it later, until she realizes that she’s probably as impulsive as he is, if not more. still, her character is the one left behind, who crouches down and holds her head while sobbing. now this… is something she really struggles to do, because the tears aren’t coming, so she tries to make it look like she’s crying and lowers her head a bit more, hiding the tears that aren’t actually falling. it probably doesn’t look that believable but it’s not like she’s a professional actress either.
she thinks that just for this once, she can hope to rely on her looks to survive the next elimination.
♡ #rkroyalsurvival, episode 6! — acting challenge ! ( "it’s all coming back to me” ).
losing the one you love the most of all, the feelings that follow, the aftermath, the first night alone; it is a feeling rose knows too well. yet, if not for them destroying her, she wouldn’t be the woman she is today. rose would not be as proud as she is, standing on stage, giving each and every opportunity her best shot. without him, she wouldn’t be her. no longer do the memories haunt her or bother her, she’s no longer kept up at night, tossing and turning, red eyed. although, at times rose catches her mind going adrift, and she wonders if he’s okay. if he’s eating. is he happy? is he safe? and even then, still, even now; rose wonders where they’d be if that promise had been kept. probably not here. she tells herself. anywhere but here.
the acting challenge, the scenario is all too familiar to her. it’s a little overwhelming to be accompanied by an accomplished senior, whom is to act as her boyfriend. rose had overheard that there were numerous dating rumors regarding her, floating about, and her relationship with one of the male trainees of royal. she laughs to herself. her and kangjoon, we’re nothing but two ex-lovers simply trying to rekindle a friendship without much luck. rose has experience to go off of, and with this hopefully being the final, singular challenge they must overcome, rose hopes that her experience and what she knows keeps her afloat that little bit longer. please.
but this calls for her to go back, to think and to relive what she’s gone through, what she has experienced. rose is reminded of the good and the bad, and the trauma that accompanies alcohol, often a mistake. always a mistake. rose plays the part as she’s been asked, as she’s practiced with noh jihoon. and while scene one is rather bittersweet, she’s reminded of the day where she was forced to collect her things and leave the apartment behind. that day had forced rose to close a door behind her, on a possibly beautiful, blossoming future of which now is nothing but a mass of what ifs and maybes. rose folds the clothes into her suitcase, thoughts on her mind. this isn’t acting, i’m simply reminiscing on what was.
rose had struggled the most with the second scene. without alcohol running through her system, cozing up to a rather respectable senior had been a little awkward for her, but she was reminded of the advise jihoon had slipped her during rehearsals and thankfully, they had opportunity to go over those few scenes again and again until rose was content with her progress. rose is genuinely happy, comfortable enough to hang around with her senior, laughing and smiling, thinking about all of the positives and good things she’s witness occur in her past.
but, it’s scene three that catches her off guard and the breakdown is somewhat simple and expected, it’s what they wanted. it can be tiring, exhausting to pent up feelings and emotions for so long. rose hadn’t felt as though there was anything else to keep to herself but once again, she’s surprised, so what’s new? she stumbles off set once the director has called cut, red eyed, tears streaming down her flushed cheeks and she forces herself to laugh it off. you’re good at acting, rose! she laughs constantly, shrugging off their compliments but also muttering quiet thank yous.
if only they knew.
but they wouldn’t. some things are best kept bound to your heart for eternity.
it’s an endless game of waiting ; time moving like a pendulum. swinging to and fro, every second noted with conscious effort as she watches the others go before her. waiting for her turn was a game she was beginning to hate the longer it took; every time the director snapped his action! and cut! had her on high alert, line of vision vying for the source of sound only to chasten when she realizes her turn has yet to come. it all brings forth the mantra she’s been chanting for the last half hour -- one she recalls from the hour she had spent practicing with noh jihoon: don’t worry, and you won’t mess up.
pretty much,
a nicer way of saying: try to not to fuck it up too badly.
if jihyun had been given the choice prior, she would have thrown caution to the wind and gone first -- wanting to get over it. whether or not, fools would be made from her performance; anything was better than this torture that was the waiting game. to make matters worst, her turn wouldn’t even come as quickly as she hoped. she was dead last, there was no running from being the one people would leave the day with the most recent impression cast.
she dreaded to think that she’d somehow fuck up and that would be the end of it. among the girls, she sees herself divided -- her experience from dream high, though one to be noted on her resume, was little to account for. small scenes and very few lines to back up that experience did nothing when she knew the other girls were destined to shine in front of the camera in ways that jihyun would assume to pale in. her colors were in her voice, not her acting.
but she hopes to at least not be mediocre. and in the event, she somehow does well ( well being a objective term, well somehow equating that she wasn’t the worst of the day ), then maybe she’ll see that it isn’t so different than a performance on the stage. after all, didn’t she want to portray a story with her voice -- acting would should be the same way, right?
she runs over the lines once more -- a script that’s referenced more than once in the last hour as her time comes near. the nerves functioning upright; an appearance out of thin air that takes a hold of her legs, ankles shaking as she shifts in her seat. all this time and now her tail had to cower between her legs?
“lee jihyun!” it’s automatic, the way her smile rises and the shaking ceases. she keeps her head held high at the right moments, bowing as she enters the circle of cameras and crew that decorate the main set. it’s that rush of adrenaline that has her eyes uneasy; least meeting her eyes as they go from noh jihoon to so jisub at the far corner. jihyun doesn’t know who she wants to impress more. her esteemed sunbae who had worked so hard all day helping all the girls, including herself, get their scenes just right ( and disrespect the time and hard work that they had put into their practice ) or her critical ceo who had all her hopes and dreams dangling on a string -- ready to be tied or cut with a single gesture.
a small minute to herself clears her mind, a gulp made as she spares a glance back to jihoon -- leveling her gaze with him enough to note the smile he throws her way. and in that instance, she breathes a little more calmly. as if his smile had been the answer she had been searching for all this time. she lets air passively relieve itself from the constriction her muscles had on her lungs and relaxes.
“okay -- it’s been a long day, but this is our last girl for the day! take your places, actors!”
and just like that the pressure builds and jihyun has to force herself to restrain the nerves climbing along her spine. she moves; feet a mobile rush that get her to the couch, seated with her palms placed in her lap; tapping at her knees -- a nervous tick that helps little to sate the troublesome trembles. “alright! quiet on the set -- ready?” no. jihyun breathes in through her nose.
“action!”
and exhales heavily from her lips.
so it begins, the silence of the room welcomes jihyun. there’s so little one can say but so much more that can be done as shown as the camera pans into her movement, capturing each facet that is sewn in her notions. from the way fingers tremble ( some from the nerves, some from methodical acting ), to how the very same fingers run through her hair. an obvious frustration run along every curve until the frown on her face is disturbed by the brown tendrils that fall into her eyes as she gets up from the couch and makes her way to the dresser; pulling the doors open.
handfuls of clothing, dressed upon hangers are pulled into her arms. the articles placed in the luggage; slowly, painfully so -- as if begging to be stopped. once all the clothes have filled the luggage, she takes her seat back on the couch. a pause as she reaches for the lid of the case; bringing it to a close but refraining from actually locking it. fingers touch the locks; a passing moment before the distinct sound click! is heard in the quiet studio.
“cut! onto the next scene,”
far more in her element -- a lighter change of atmosphere. where smiling isn’t so hard to come by. where laughter is actually genuine when thrown by jokes and glancing that teeter on intimate. it’s a tale jihyun weaves with a certain australian boy but he’s no where to be found. somehow, she makes do -- in jihoon’s eyes she sees rome and that’s all that matters to her. to her, this was the only way to make it a ounce believable ; at least there was real love in those dark brown hues of hers.
that couldn’t be easily faked. but in each embrace, every brush of her fingertips against his jaw, each look; jihyun feels a tiny pang in her heart. it’s small but carries the biggest weight. pulls it along with her in every turn and tightening of her arms around his waist. it deepens her laughter and furthers the resolve; she may have his trophy, it would only suit jihyun to return the favor.
to make it all the way to the end; making the absence of his presence worth it.
that has her smiling more -- brighter as she looks on at jihoon, smile turning bashful when his own hands capture her face to pull back dark curls from her eyes.
“and cut! last scene, everyone -- let’s try to make it in one take!”
among the scenes practiced, jihyun favors the way the tears begin to roll down her cheeks. during practice, she hadn’t been able to bring herself to cry. the light atmosphere being the cause; and more often than not, whenever she had tried to cry, all that would end up coming out was the vein in her forehead from the strain she was putting on the attempt.
but of course, once the cameras had begun rolling -- it was as if the mighty dam that held her tears from her water ducts had been broken. due south they came; running the course of her cheeks -- coloring them pale and pink as she cried. where her fingertips had once graciously touched his jaw, they tried to get him to look at her -- her own tries to get him to stay were useless. in each instance, his own hands pulled hers off -- away, discarded.
in it, she tries to keep the task at hand at the front of her mind -- delving into her past would be the worst of it. perhaps, the biggest of her problems if they were to surface. she resists to use it as her driving force -- instead pushes them, her, him, everyone one of them the furthest from her mind. each one of her loves, a token of her heart broken off for every one that decided to run away with it. it finally breaks her -- takes her mind away from the scene only for a moment, right when the tears begin to fall consistently, gathering at her chin.
her voice were beginning to phase in and out in trembles as she took his hand only to be pushed away; another attempt and an even harder push. again, where arms wind around his waist; face hidden into the plane of his back.
“please don’t go.”
they tighten, loosen -- break as he pulls them apart and forces her off of him. he’s pauses in his movements, hands letting go of her own; a second away from stalking off but not before looking her dead in the eye and speaking the very last lines in the script.
“enough, we’re done.”
he departs and it’s emotional, it hurts and jihyun can feel the way the emotions are catching up to her. fingers pull back tendrils, frustratingly wiping at the tears left on her cheeks as she collapses to the floor; head downcast as her tears continue to fall.
“and that’s a wrap, everyone! that’s it for today!”
the director calls it. the sound of the board slamming shut marks the end of the day; she can hear the tired sighs simultaneously echoing each other as she rises to stand. taking it in small strides as she bows to each of the staff and crew, especially thanking the one who graces her with a towel to wipe the last of the tears that had stuck upon her reddened cheeks.
but she refrains from pushing the tough terry along her skin, instead she makes a point to catch jihoon before he truly leaves. the towel handed his way, “i was going to use it -- but i thought you might need it more than me considering i already used your shirt as my tissue.” she says before bowing, thanking him for not giving up on her despite the numerous attempts at each scene.
“i really couldn’t have done it without you, sunbae.”
✿ royal survival show, episode 6
required solo; i’m crying, get me out of here
Okay. So Jiseob really had a lot of hidden cards in his sleeve, but this one surprised Elly the most.
It was the second time since the start of the show since the contestants were personally introduced to a senior artists and work with them in one way or another. This time it was no other but Roh Jihoon. Yet, their task made her dread her decisions for the whole show.
Elly was anything but an actress. She could probably be a comedian, but not an actress. It had never interested her, but she decided that she had to try it out. What if she liked it? She didn't have much to lose, but damn, was it intimidating for the first ten minutes because she wasn't sure where to look. His face? Through him? Anywhere but him.
But it was for ten minutes. The chatting was nice and pleasant, though Elly was somewhat willing to waste her luck and time on playing the 20-question's game, because who wouldn't want to get to know each other if they were going to have to act together.
Things went down nice and easy. She was joking in the beginning of the whole idea of rehearsing with Jihoon, just trying to get comfortable because it was supposed to be a fun experience. But soon after she was more than just comfortable with the other, it all went down just fine after that.
She had practiced as much as she could, trying to do her best even before the opportunity to act with the artist. But it all felt different, because maybe, she was acting with a well-established idol and professional, instead of just herself and the mirror.
Out of all three scenes, the emotional breakdown one, was probably the easiest for her. She just needed to remember a few things, a few things her father said and did to her, were more than enough for her to get into that state of mind and react properly. And she did.
All the pent-up emotion and stress, was more than enough to set her tears free by the time male slammed the fake door in his way out. And she didn't stop for a while, which Elly found annoying, but it only made her cry a bit harder as she tried to contain her tears and sobs, and just like practiced, her knees 'gave in' and she was crouched on the floor, hand covering her lips as she squeezed her eyes tightly shut.
Eventually, when the crew had said they had enough, she picked herself up and quickly excused herself to the toilet, almost running out of the set, where she locked herself. She knew she wouldn't have privacy, due to the fact that she ran out crying, so cameras and people would end up pilling in front of the door and she'd have to leave.
However, what a great way to set up the mood. Being the first one to film and making such a dramatic exit, definitely will be her worst memory so far while appearance on TV. What a way to start the filming day.
against all odds, this week’s challenge was revealed to revolve around something that dawon actually felt comfortable with: acting. it was another opportunity to put over a decade of acting experience to good use, and she couldn’t have been happier (unless, of course, they had gotten her to sing). that didn’t mean that she could slack off or let her guard down, however, as feeling comfortable didn’t necessarily equal a free pass. natural actors did exist, and it’d be foolish for dawon to underestimate the competition, especially when girls like seolhyun and jihyun—who dawon already knew to be experienced actors,—remained in the competition.
dawon had been out of the theater for over a year, meaning that she was well overdue for a bit of practice. as different as it felt to her, this was still a part of the competition, and she planned to work just as hard as she had each of the other times her position in the show was put on the line. she spent hours getting into the mindset of the role they were expected to play, practicing her facial expressions in front of the mirror, rehearsing alone, and everything else she could do to prepare alone.
that wasn’t to say she didn’t also rehearse with others, however. some of her time was dedicated to rehearsing with seolhyun, just as they had many times before, as it felt much closer to the actual thing when there was someone else going along with her. the day of rehearsing with noh jihoon was slightly different, as she didn’t know the man that well, though it was nothing that dawon couldn’t adapt to. this wasn’t the first time she had acted with someone who was practically a stranger to her, after all (her dad’s theater had provided many opportunities, even if things had felt awkward from time to time). still, it was going to be slightly difficult to imagine noh jihoon as who she originally imagined the scene with, though she hoped that it wouldn’t make too much of a difference. by the time their hour was up, dawon felt confident enough in herself and noh jihoon to feel as though she could actually make it to the finale, despite how much she had doubted herself in her past.
soojung has never acted before, she doesn't think she'll nail it because she of what she thinks; her androgynous features ( knowing and living with the fact that she's not as pretty as the other girls are ), her big nose, and the resting bitch face that she has. pretty much, her reputation as an ice princess. there's definitely better girls for this role, she feels as if lisa and jihyun are definitely better. they're up there, she isn't.
not to mention, she's never been through a breakup before. oh sehun's her first relationship, her first love and first long-term. but she has enough time to rehearse, understand everything and the flow the needs to be done. the requirement of the scenes, there's a good cast and lighting crew to make sure she looks good. the angles of the camera shouldn't be bad either, they know what angle suits her and that doesn't.
although the process is long, she'll get through it. her last name starts with a j, the order goes by chronological and it's following names. knowing this, soojung has more time to look at herself in the mirror. study her features, make sure all is well with her gestures and acting. she can't let out tears easily if she has to, but she'll try succumbing to her weakest point. thinking of what could be, what tears her heart into two. she's really not a natural at acting but she'll just have to give it a shot. try her best, that's all she can really do.
not only that, but acting is going to be a learning curve for her. if she doesn't prepare herself for this, what'll make her ready in the long run if she can't simply act a broken-hearted girl in the middle of the scene? especially, debut videos are a thing. she must show so jisub that she's all in all for this.
