LIFE AND DEATH ♡
pairing: ryuk x fem!reader
summary: ryuk knows he can treat you better than light can. he knows he can make you feel better than light can even if there's no way for you to know that.
cw: nsfw (18+), smut, somnophilia, noncon, monster x human, fingering
wc: 1.8k
a/n: wanted to write something halloween-ish so here we go hehe. this goes out to that one anon who encouraged me on this. you're a real one 🫶
Ryuk promised himself he'd never do this.
Really, it wasn't even a conscious promise. More like a piece of innate knowledge. Something all Shinigamis were instilled with. A personal law he never planned on breaking.
Never fall for a human.
It seemed easy. Humans were weak and inferior in just about every way imaginable. They were short-sighted, hot-headed, unintelligent, and incredibly fragile creatures. So many things could break them. Loving one would be like a tiger infatuated with a mouse. And what was the value in something barely worth batting between your paws?
But when he believed all of that, when he thought himself capable of such indifference, he'd never seen one like you.
In all his years drifting between realms, Ryuk had never laid eyes on one of your kind that was so beautiful. You looked divine, soft and glowing in an environment that was otherwise so dim.
Where others came off as crass and annoying, he saw you as playful and sweet. To him, other humans’ inability to see on a larger scale was an inherent flaw. But in regards to you, it was an imperfection that served as evidence as to why you needed him.
You weren't a pest to be swatted away. You were his naive little lamb. His to keep safe from slaughter, to protect and guide even if you never knew of his presence.
Tonight, you slept soundly in bed while he hovered next to you above what was supposed to be Light's side of the mattress. Your boyfriend who didn't deserve you, the one who technically tethered Ryuk to this world. Even though at the beginning of their arrangement Ryuk had promised Light to forever remain neutral on his affairs, that was becoming increasingly hard.
All the nights Light spent slumped over his desk or ruminating on his next move, all the hours he spent going from the taskforce headquarters to secret meetings with Kiyomi, Ryuk couldn’t stand it. Light had the ability to love you fully. To watch you smile as he kissed the apples of your cheeks, to bask in your breaths fanning over his face, to feel your heart beating for him beneath his palms. To have you love him in return.
But he took advantage of exactly none of it. He brushed you off more than he indulged any of your affection. Most days Ryuk wondered why you even stayed in this relationship. He was grateful that you did though. If not for your undying loyalty to Light, the Shinigami would lose you too.
It would be a loss you didn't know about, for you couldn't see Ryuk. Light had never let you touch the notebook that would bridge the gap. It was probably just as well. Ryuk didn’t want to know what your reaction would be to seeing him for the first time.
Most humans screamed. Their eyes widened as shrieks burst from their mouths. They scrambled back, tripped over their feet, did anything they could to get away from the terrifying Shinigami. You’d probably turn and run right into Light’s arms, as if he was the one who wanted to protect you.
Ryuk watched as you shifted in your sleep. Your body rolled in his direction, allowing him a full view of you. You sighed in your sleep. The faint breath was accompanied by a few mumbled words. Nothing he could make out.
His eyes drank you in while his fingers twitched with the urge to touch you. Your breasts pushed against the fabric of the old t-shirt you wore tonight. He could see the curves of both. The hem had ridden up, giving him a glimpse of your silky thighs and tempting red panties.
He could barely stand it. Not touching you gave him the same taut aches that abstaining from apples did. His body wanted to twist and writhe and contort all because he didn’t have your soft flesh within reach.
Instead of grabbing at your body to satiate the hunger, his fingers stroked along your jaw. They coasted back to your neck, eliciting another hitched breath from you.
You were so precious, so fucking pure. His little human. His sweet mortal girl.
His long fingers rose again and curled around the back of your skull. Your head was the perfect size for his hand. His thumb swept along the curve of your cheek, continuing to pet you while you remained so blissfully unaware.
He could only focus on your face for so long though before some natural force dragged his hand downward. It pulled his lithe limb South, over your thumping carotid and hard collarbone. The plush swell of your breast landed in his palm somehow. He squeezed it before he knew what he was doing.
You reacted, rolling your front a little more into the mattress as if trying to shoo the mystery source of pressure away. But he wouldn’t be so easily obstructed.
He hovered closer, drifting to float above you rather than beside. His hand slid between your warm body and the mattress. He continued to grope at your breasts. He made sure not to be too rough, using only enough force to give you the feeling of a nice massage.
You squirmed again, but he didn’t let up. His nimble fingers targeted one of your nipples. He rolled the stiffening bud between the pads. He gave it a little pinch and a tug, and that was when he got a whimper from you.
Ryuk had never really felt pleasure before. He knew enjoyment and satisfaction, but he’d never felt the sensation that made humans throw their heads back and cry out and claw at each other’s flesh. When you made that little breathy noise though, he came a bit closer to understanding it. A rush ran through his bones, spreading a tingling spark to the deepest parts of him.
He couldn’t stop now. Originally, he just wanted a little feel to stave off his cravings for you. But after hearing that, he couldn’t just let go. He’d never heard you sound so good. He had to have more. And you deserved to feel good too. He wanted to give you that. Even if you didn’t know it was him doing it, he wanted to make you feel better than Light ever had.
He sank down closer to you so that his chest was against your back. You couldn’t see him, but he could feel your figure in his embrace, warm and pliant in the way only human bodies were. His hand glided from your breast to your waist. He pet the dip there, stroking your body over and over like he wanted to memorize it.
You still didn’t wake. It was pretty cute. He’d never noticed you to be such a heavy sleeper.
One of your legs hiked up, raising so that you were slightly spread open for him. A raspy laugh rumbled from his throat. You wanted him even if there was no way you were aware of that.
He pushed your t-shirt up even higher. You shivered as your stomach became exposed to the night air. His nails dragged across the skin. They looked so sharp against the tender softness of your flesh.
His fingers ventured down, round the curve of your hip. He tucked the searching digits beneath the lacy band that rested right below your navel. You were warmest here. Heat emanated from the area. It called to his hand, pulled him in closer.
He spread you apart with two of his digits while the middle one delved in between. Your breath hitched again when he found that sweet little bundle of nerves. The pad of his finger flicked across it curiously. He could only imagine how pretty you looked between your thighs. He could see if he just rolled you onto your back and sliced your panties down the middle with one of his sleek nails.
It took the small amount of willpower he had left to convince himself not to do that. He didn’t want to freak you out if you woke up before Light came home. That could wait until another night.
He remained content with swirling his finger around your clit in tiny circles. Your hips twitched a little.
“Atta girl,” he rasped.
He pressed down a little harder on the sensitive bud, and you whined in your sleep. Your fingers gripped the edge of your pillow, flexing around the soft cushion. He kept his digits moving. They slipped down to gather some of the slick leaking from you.
The wetter you got, the easier it was for him to play you like a fine-tuned instrument. Ryuk had never been particularly skilled with his hands, but for you, it wasn’t a problem. He found a rhythm quick. He moved based on what got the most whimpers and squeaks out of you without bringing you fully to consciousness.
That heat in his bones only got stronger. For as long as he could remember, he’d never believed Shinigamis to be capable of true desire. Most of them were certainly void of passion, so lust must have been out of reach too. But right now, with you in his grasp, your warm, pulsating body in his clutches, he felt like he had hot blood running through his veins.
He rubbed you faster and faster. Your hips were no longer twitching. Instead, your body had graduated to full on trembling. Your leg lifted even higher on the mattress. A strangled mewl fell from your lips as you squished your face to the pillow.
Ryuk was so lost in it all that he barely noticed when your noise of pleasure became clear. A moan rang out of you. Your body spasmed, hips rocking back and forth, spine arching. You’d clearly hit your peak.
He took it all in, his eyes even wider than usual. It was perfect. He couldn’t have dreamed of a better possibility.
But the high also meant the end. It meant he only got a few minutes more of this.
He didn’t take a second for granted. His fingers continued to swirl, gradually slowing down as if to guide you back into the comfort of sleep.
It didn’t fully work because he felt you begin to shift below him with a bit more motivation. He slipped his hand from your bottoms and tugged your shirt back into place before drifting away to the space beside the bed.
He watched as you rose onto your elbow and glanced around the room with bleary eyes.
“Light…?” you mumbled.
But upon seeing the room dark, the door shut, and your boyfriend nowhere to be found, you dropped back into your pillow and shut your eyes.
Ryuk glided closer once again. He watched your muscles relax. One deep breath left you before they all fell into an unconscious cadence.
His hand swept across your head. You couldn’t feel his touch, but he could feel your hair and the shape of your skull. It made something glow inside him. He continued to hover there, just watching you rest.
“Not Light, sweet girl,” he whispered.
There was no way you could hear him, but he still liked to think that some part of you knew.
