#sam speedy

[frootlooppoptarts]

I thought we were going to The Met. Taxidermy is better than art. I just wanted like an oil painting. And I wanted to see this li'l skunk guy do his thang.

museum with the girls (yard sale girls)

Micaela (short brunette with glasses): What's our plan if someone gets lost? Sam (tall brunette wearing rugby polo): We're not gonna get lost 'cause we're not eight. Michaela: I'm gonna get lost. Serah (blonde wearing a baggu): My phone's at two percent. Sam: Everyone hold hands. Sam: Where's Becca? Serah: Code red! *running* Sam: Bo Peep. We've got a Bo Peep. Lost child. Becca (tall brunette with glasses): *standing extremely close to a museum placard* Micaela: Should we take her to get her eyes checked? Sam: She's got her glasses on; she should be fine. Becca: *pinches and zooms the text on the wall* Micaela: *offscreen* She's really not. Serah: I know they don't come alive at night, but if they did, we would have a thing. *quick shot of a hairy caveman* Sam: I think you need to go to a doctor. I think something might be going on with you hormonally. Serah: It's just called being horny, Sam. Becca: *digging in her cheetah print purse* Turkey or ham? Micaela: How'd you get those past security? Becca: No one questions these cheeks. Micaela: *patting Becca's cheeks* Turkey. Becca: Ehh, turkey's for me. Micaela: Ham. Becca: Sorry. Serah: This guy, Sam? Sam: *elated* Nobody knows how to haul wood anymore. Serah: Well he's got two women so we know that about him. Sam: Maybe they're just friends. Serah: They're burying meat for him. Micaela: Pretty hot throuple. Becca: Can we go to small furry animals now please? I need to infodump about lemurs to someone. Zamboomafo (sic) is not who you think he is. Sam: *shocked face* Sam: I thought we were going to The Met. Serah: Taxidermy is better than art. Sam: I just wanted like an oil painting. Serah: And I wanted to see this li'l skunk guy do his...do his thang. Micaela: Yeah, this is something I've never seen before. Micaela: Art should be appreciated from multiple perspectives. Micaela: *standing varying distances away from the chilkat robe in question* Micaela: Sometimes you gotta sneak up on it sometimes. Becca: Ah! Sam: That's you. Becca: *fist on her cheek contemplatively* Mmm. I don't see it. *Sculpture mimicking her position exactly* Becca: I don't sit like that. I'm not sitting. I'm literally standing. Micaela: *whisper shouting* Stop walking away from me! Serah: *whisper shouting* Stop telling me facts! Becca: Girls. Girls! Dance it out. Micaela: *whisper shouting* NO! Becca: Dance it out. Micaela: *whispering and doing a li'l shimmy shake* I want to tell you facts. Serah: *also whispering and doing a li'l shimmy shake* I don't want to learn anything ever. Sam: Where's Sue the T-Rex? Serah: They moved her to Chicago. Sam: Then why the FUCK are we here? Becca: Ooh the gift shop. I wanna spend $40 on something I'll throw away in three years. Sam: I wonder if they have astronaut ice cream. Micaela: *holding a little bee stuffed animal behind the glass of the gift shop*

[frootlooppoptarts]

That's what Halloween's about: Become the thing that can destroy you. It doesn't destroy you, it just makes you fart.

"Mom, pick me up, I don't like girl Halloween" yard sale girls

(snapchat-style caption over all that says "Mom, pick me up, I don't like girl Halloween) Becca (wearing a black tshirt, black jeans, and a cheese wedge hat): Check it out, I'm cheese! Sam (sitting on the floor, wearing a blue striped shirt): Becca, you're lactose intolerant. Becca: Yeah but that's what Halloween's about: Become the thing that can destroy you. Serah (sitting on the floor, holding a wine glass): It doesn't destroy you, it just makes you fart. Serah: *to Sam* Oh, you could be a sexy nurse. Micaela (sitting and wearing glasses, a blue button down, and a blazer): I believe they're called "essential workers." Sam (sitting and wearing red and two small red cones on her head): I could be a sexy essential worker. No one's ever called me essential before. Micaela: You're an es-sensual worker. Sam: *excited face* Becca: On the way to the party, can we make a few Halloween caroling stops? Sam: What's a Halloween carol? Becca: You know like, "There's a little black cat sittin' in a pumpkin on a graaave." Micaela: *standing and tooting on pan pipes rhythmically but not at all tunefully* Becca: *singing* "There's a ghost and the ghost is your boyfriend! He takes off all your clothes." Becca: Are you wearing a costume? Serah (standing in a white crop top, holding a glass of orange wine): I'm a pregnant lady. But I'm not showing yet. Micaela: *offscreen to the left* And the wine's part of it? Serah: Yeah. Serah: You can drink until they grow fingers. Becca: *offscreen behind the camera* Is this like a funny costume...? Serah: It's hilarious.