#sarcastic_quotes

[newdayquotes24]

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

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[newdayquotes24]

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.

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[newdayquotes24]

I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’me later.

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[newdayquotes24]

If you want to be sure that you never forget your wife’s birthday, just try forgetting it once.

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[newdayquotes24]

I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they're going and hook up with ’me later.

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[newdayquotes24]

Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path

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[newdayquotes24]

My advice to you is get married: If you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher

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[newdayquotes24]

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

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