#savageintent

[allthingsdarkanddirty]

Jordan Marie ~ Savage Intent ~ Release Blitz / Teasers

  Title: Savage Intent Series: Kingdom of Sin #2 Author: Jordan Marie Genre: Contemporary Mafia Romance Tropes: Age Gap/Forced Marriage/Secr

[allthingsdarkanddirty]

Jordan Marie ~ Savage Intent ~ Cover Reveal / Teasers

  Title: Savage Intent Series: Kingdom of Sin #2 Author: Jordan Marie Genre: Contemporary Mafia Romance Tropes: Age Gap/Forced Marriage/Secr

[melancholxa]

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Comments: i should probably make clear in general that the url and icon matter like, really really little to me and have very little influence on my rating, haha. xD but hi there ! thanks for sending this in ! i believe i mentioned when we first talked, but i haven't watched the show your character's from ;; so again, i know very little about how he acts and therefore can't really speak to how you play him. jsdhf i also can't really say much about your description of him caauuusee you don't really have one |D

also, correct me if i'm wrong, but i think your blog is pretty new? i could only see 6 pages and there weren't really any roleplay posts for me to work off of. i did look at that drabble you wrote though, so i'll be basing my comments off that. of course, it's only one sample of your writing, but it's all i've got to work off of for now |D

overall, fantastic writing ! i like your use of descriptive language a lot ! your sentences flow very well together, which is not something i find on a lot of blogs, even ones where people write very well. the prose is generally very smooth, and i really like that. i did notice a few grammatical errors here and there -- commas where it could've been periods or semicolons, that kind of thing. there were also several times where things should've been capitalized, but weren't ? i wasn't sure if that was intentional. also, you switched back and forth between past and present tense in your prose quite a bit, which is sort of incongruous. maybe keep an eye out for that in the future?

but in general, really really great. c: these are just minor things to keep in mind if you want to take my advice <3