So I did a scientific analysis on what type of ‘fluid’ Green Orbs are made of because I’m a huge fucking nerd
((To preface this, I’m a senior in college with a major in Biochemistry, and I plan on pursuing cancer research in grad school. Therefore, I am a huge fucking science nerd.))
So, while I was studying Hemoglobin in my Biochem class, naturally I began to wonder how this relates to the logic behind Red Orbs and Green Orbs. Now, I know game developers definitely aren’t medical experts, just as how I’m definitely not an expert at programming...but one thing has been REALLY bugging me since I first thought about this:
wHERE THE FUCK DO gREEN oRBS COME FROM????
The reason I ask this is because, in the DMC series, Red Orbs are defined as the “crystalized blood” of demons, whereas Green Orbs are defined as the “crystallized fluids” of demons.
The problems with this is...uh...WHICH FLUIDS ARE WE TALKING HERE
The term “fluid” is a VERY vague term in the science world. It can refer to anything from blood to feces, and everything in between. We’re talking saliva, piss, snot, vomit, literal piles of shit. ALL of these could technically be referred to as “fluids”
So, when these guys say that “green orbs are some unspecified bodily fluid in demons”, naturally my first thought was “OHMYGOD THEY’RE LITERALLY EATING DEMON SNOT”
But then my biochem knowledge kicked in like an Ace Attorney and was like: “OBJECTION!”
“It clearly says on the DMC wiki that Green Orbs can count towards your Red Orb total if the player has full vitality. This means that Green Orbs must be some derivative of blood, or else they wouldn’t count towards the Red Orb total.”
Which is a very real possibility. After all, human blood contains plasma, and when this plasma is removed, it makes a new fluid called serum.
This serum, according to Wikipedia, contains antibodies, proteins, and other useful stuff that keeps the body healthy. This keeps up with the logic of Green Orbs healing the player, because we typically think of antibodies as something that “heals” the body. AND we literally use serum all the time in the lab. So then I was like “okay so maybe it’s just blood plasma, nbd”
But then I remembered two critical things:
Serum doesn’t exist in natural form; it can literally only be made in a lab by extracting the blood and shit from it
(Most importantly) SERUM IS YELLOW NOT GREEN
So THEN I was like: “OBJECTION! If Green Orbs are serum/blood plasma, and serum is NOT green, then why would Green Orbs be green?”
But then I was like: “OBJECTION! Not all animals have red blood!”
Which is also true. Animal blood can be a bunch of weird colors depending on the species, including green. Granted, green blood is typically only found in worms...BUT given how weird demon anatomy is, I was willing to let that part slide.
But then I realized that I was forgetting one very crucial thing here...
WE LITERALLY HAVE CRYSTALLIZED DEMON BLOOD IN-GAME, AND THAT BLOOD IS *CLEARLY* RED!!!
So then I was like “YOU CAN’T HAVE GREEN BLOOD *AND* RED BLOOD YOU ABSOLUTE WALNUT IT’S GOTTA BE SOMETHING ELSE”
But THEN I was like “BUT GREEN ORBS CAN’T BE A DIFFERENT TYPE OF FLUID BECAUSE IT TECHNICALLY COUNTS AS RED ORBS IN DMC ECONOMICS??? SO IT HAS TO AT LEAST BE SOMEWHAT LIKE BLOOD OR ELSE IT WOULDN’T BE VALID CURRENCY????”
And then BOTH of my arguing brain cells were just like “WHAT KIND OF FUCKERY IS THIS”
At this point, I was completely clusterfucked and desperate to find an answer, so I quickly searched up the different kinds of fluids in the human body (since demons can breed with humans, we can assume their anatomy and physiology operates similarly to humans also).
And I FINALLY found the answer. Hold on to your butts y’all, I’m about to blow your mind:
Green Orbs aren’t demon snot...they’re demon VOMIT!!
Vomit (bile) is the ONLY fluid that fits all of the criteria mentioned by my 2 arguing brain cells above:
It technically contains red blood cells (they’re dead but don’t worry about it)
Since those blood cells don’t *technically* have to be alive in order to be valid currency (they’re still blood, like a wrinkly dollar bill is still a dollar bill), green orbs could *technically* be considered valid currency in DMC
It’s green, and it’s a fluid
It’s found in mammals, who have red blood similar to demons in DMC
And the chemical used to make green bile (biliverdin) is also found in bruises, which — GUESS WHAT? — are part of the body’s natural healing process. Which coincides with Green Orbs’ healing properties in DMC.
SO IN CONCLUSION: When Dante/Nero/V/etc. pick up green orbs in the game, they’re technically eating demon puke. Thank you for coming to my TED talk.
