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I knew GO S2 would alter me and my life again, like S1 did - I just knew. There was no way that this story would not interlace itself with my own narrative once more. But where S1 was my miracle, S2 is shaping up to be a punch in the gut and a kick in the butt. Necessary, but painful. And while I trust the lessons I absorbed and understand the growth pains, in the sinking, heartsick feeling I wake up with each morning I can't help but miss the comfort that the thought of ineffable husbands' happiness used to bring.

#my mind is a very uncomfortable a place to be rn #sealy thoughts #hopefully i can look back on this in the future #hopefully once im not vibraring with anxiety 24/7

Really hard to advocate for yourself when you don't trust yourself

#is this soulcrushing anguish even real #sealy thoughts #wish i wasnt at work rn #but i dont know where i could be that would be better #wherever you go there you are #and you still dont know who you are #cant talk about this beyond vaguepostong

You should have seen MrSeal's face when, upon his query what I liked the most in our Dover castle&cliffs visit, I lit up aka Aziraphale at a mention of lunch, and brightly replied "THE SHEEP!! 😀 😍 🤩"

#what can I say #im an animal lover first and foremost #it's my nature and I can't go against it #sealy thoughts #sheep

How does one even go about confessing the depths of unhappiness

#sealy thoughts #pay no heed #its the final meltdown

Acknowledging the past for what it is can be so terrifying

#sealy thoughts #of post 1 am variety #officially going through shit

If I were to paint a little circle of color for each of the last 30 days, most would be a dark blue to black.

All I'm saying is - it's hard. Tiring.

P.s. maybe I should take that up as a project, sounds kinda cool

#universe gives me a break #sealy thoughts #challenge #doesnt look likely upon checking the schedule