“Search for Pain”
Your mind like a contained wildfire I wish I had even the pilot light of you I feel like we see each other like long lost twins or two kids in two different cars seeing each other on the freeway wondering where the other is going wanting our lives to be more similar than different
I think of you always the thought throbs like a giant mosquito bite and if I scratch too hard I might break flesh but the rush of blood under the bump and the flaky, powdery circumference of skin draws me near
I want to know everything about you every pain you've felt and the most profound thing you've seen in this life I want to know why you like art the way you do and why I've never met someone who sees eye to eye with me until now and how I can even achieve a thirst for emotional knowledge such as yours
I am nervous that I will ruin something that I will be a diversion, not of pleasure, but of frivolity if we had something it would inevitably lead to nowhere and not last and not mean anything in a few years except we'll have the memory of it getting awkward at work when we got coffee the day after sleeping together or something
But a shred of me hopes that our similar interests don't just extend to the 2-D names we namedrop like trading and collecting baseball cards but show the dim light of some kind of shared intelligence and search for a pain and growth that can only be ignited by us trying something scary