#sing the rage

[multsicorn]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

[this is a washington/laurens fic set right after ‘meet me inside’ fyi]

i’m love this i’m screaming (yeah it’s literally three months old whatever i told y’all i’m behind) but GAH

(i really just don’t have enough of my laurens that’s one of the things)

but yeah WO W nice twist on the power play and all the aggressiveness there - but not too much - !

John’s thoughts of Alex’s and Washington’s thoughts of Alex and what they knew of each other and

“Four years, no wonder you can barely stand the sight of each other. Hamilton can’t tell you no again if he’s not here.”

i love how Washington has STANDARDS even as he’s begging.  I love John’s - arrogance, honestly, it’s not anger so much it’s just the feeling blood still sings in your veins that i want to write all the time and can’t - so -

anyway i think i’ve gone on enough for a disjointed tumblr rec (hey @kiwisatsuma you should see this) but I just loved this enough I wanted to yell here on tumblr rather than just in comments.  so.

[multsicorn]

Bent double, like old beggars under sacks, Knock-kneed, coughing like hags, we cursed through sludge, Till on the haunting flares we turned our backs And towards our distant rest began to trudge. Men marched asleep. Many had lost their boots But limped on, blood-shod. All went lame; all blind; Drunk with fatigue; deaf even to the hoots Of tired, outstripped Five-Nines that dropped behind. Gas! GAS! Quick, boys! – An ecstasy of fumbling, Fitting the clumsy helmets just in time; But someone still was yelling out and stumbling, And flound'ring like a man in fire or lime . . . Dim, through the misty panes and thick green light, As under a green sea, I saw him drowning.

In all my dreams, before my helpless sight, He plunges at me, guttering, choking, drowning.

If in some smothering dreams you too could pace Behind the wagon that we flung him in, And watch the white eyes writhing in his face, His hanging face,like a devil's sick of sin; If you could hear, at every jolt, the blood Come gargling from the froth-corrupted lungs, Obscene as cancer, bitter as the cud Of vile, incurable sores on innocent tongues, – My friend, you would not tell with such high zest To children ardent for some desperate glory, The old Lie; Dulce et Decorum est Pro patria mori.

[multsicorn]

okay so looking at letters for timelines has devolved back into looking at lams letters, as so frequently happens to me.

(they kill me okay.)

and!  anyway!  the Interesting bit, is that of course the letters between them start (for real) with the Famous ‘cold in my professions’ one in April 1779.  But when I look at the whole timeline, John was in Rhode Island with Lafayette for some months in 1778.  There were plenty of letters going back and forth during that time; Laf kept writing to Washington, for example :D.  But Hamilton didn’t write to Laurens, nor vice versa.  And then after the end of 1778, when they were separated, they did write.

ANYWAY so.  This isn’t evidence per se, but it’s nicely fitting the idea that maybe they ~got together~ not at Valley Forge, but sometime in the last few months of ‘78 - or first few months of ‘79 - and, well, that’s really nice because the duel happened at the very end of ‘78.  December 23.

(Alexander, you’re the closest friend I’ve got.) (Laurens, do not throw away your shot.)

v Dramatic, no?

[multsicorn]

Laurens: I know your sights were set on dyin’ in a blaze of glory

me: how dare you tbh

~

(Laurens’ line apparently from some early draft of the play.  And I’m just... it’s true! - Hamilton did write to Eliza that he hadn’t been planning to survive the war.  Though it’s a bit rich for Laurens to say, very pot calling kettle, which is of course exactly why I love it so much.)

(COULD YOU BOTH TRY NOT TO DIE.  Is that so much to ask.  I always think - in my headcanon anyway - that they enable each others’ worst instincts, as well as some of their best, which is exactly why I love and have all these #feelings about them of course but - )

(idk just the idea of Laurens trying to tell Ham DON’T DIE is both endlessly hilarious and heartbreaking to me.)

[multsicorn]

also I’m torn between being Excited there’s characterization meta on my dash again (and about my favorite character at that!) and kinda wanting to join in and… feeling all wanting to argue w everyone ;p and avoid all hints of conflict ever w everyone i don’t know super well p much

.___.

[multsicorn]

a chorus inside my head

* when will my laptop #return from the war * … john laurens never returned from the war :((( * but! he does in my fic! * … although he was trying so hard not to .___. * but it’s okay he will Figure It Out

also i do want my laptop back but also i just want to keep feeling these feels. so~

[multsicorn]

I'm writing lams meeting and everyone writes them as bff's (I mean, they were) but they are also the most pigtail pulling pair of people I've ever written is2g Like! What do these guys have in common! They both love fighting! A lot!!!

[multsicorn]

it’s the self-destructiveness and the drive to be Perfect that work so interestingly in tandem