#smichelle

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My sister is so cute. She was like if mom and dad ever get another house they should have a homemade chapel so we can pray.

I was like OMG! YAS

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Y'all highly religious people?

Our mom is. My dad followed. Idk about everyone else but I talk to him because of her and my grandma. That's probably bad but if I ever lose them. That's all I have.

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I lost someone I could never imagine losing. She was my cousin but might as well be my sibling. But I'm not so I can't imagine what my cousins or my aunt are going thru or her little girls are going thru.

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Rude lol

Idk I'm a Gemini Sun/Water Dom so friendship is really important. And it does happen even if I'm attracted to you.

But yeah you're probably not as attractive to the point in which I would ruin our friendship but also it could be you're too close to the point in which I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship.

Like I've ruined a friendship with a guy that I liked romantically but after we had sex he just could not fit the bill. And I ghosted him and he was like wtf? And I didn't give him an explanation and we were territorily mean to each other. Like for some reason we would get jealous even tho there couldn't be anything there and I was like man I wish we were still friends because you're very funny and know alot of random shit that makes me happy. And I loved his dad and it just sucked.

Then with the girl. I unconsciously was attracted to her but didn't know it. I was always buying her things and super excited to see her and she'd look at me like are you sure you're not gay? I was like :pause: naw. But we were always fighting and she did tell me she liked me and I was like you only feel that way because you're having troubles with your gf. Then they broke up and I started to see her more and more physically and emotionally attractive so I was like hmmm. But then I was like naw I like you too much.

Very much hate when sex is involved.

I remember my friend Mike was like I have sex with my Ex best friend from HS all the time. I was like uhhhh.

Idk. Im protective and weird with feelings. So it's always like a hell no from me.

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I wasn't like fuh-king annoyed for a moment today but just regular annoyed. I woke up and roamed around the internet and saw a message and was like :closes eyes:

I got a Pinterest message saying, "Hey,I sent you an email." I was like :beady eyes: yeah I know. The message didn't go into further detail after that. I was like okay nothing too bad could have happened. I mean no one can have died or I'd feel some sort of somber via text. Plus I would have heard about it already.

Part of me wanted to read the email to end this idiotic loop but the petty part of me was like :puts hand in front of chest: no. I refuse to partake.

I became more interested in what kind of person you have to be in order to go through such lengths and denial of a person's personality that he's lived through for 7 years to be like hmmm everything is fine. She's fine. She just hasn't seen my email. I was like hmm.

I mean it did cross my mind that if I were male there would not be an issue. I'd read the email and I'd see him on his bday in October. He'd confidently have my number and lines of communication would be open and free to use. All past and future behaviors would be over looked.

Up-date Sept 11th :hangs head::deep exhale: I had to reply. I was like : explicit deletetive:

I was avoiding this place and had to go to Pinterest and everything is on private except some boards so I was flying under the radar but I need to private some other boards that I like so he doesn't know when I'm there.

I was like awe man. I saved to the visible one. I open it and am just like :squint,eye wince,eyes open: LOL. That's not gonna happen. So it wasn't so bad.

But,I was like either I'm being unreasonable and unrealistic which is plausible or he's being unnecessary which is a personality trait. I don't even contact him and that should say alot. I was just like how much longer do I have to have this? I'm not having a conversation. I don't particularly want to kill the friendship and I'm indifferent on keeping it. I just want to take it and place it somewhere and leave it alone.

[bouquet-luminary]

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Godt,I have a love/hate relationship with my first name. It's like so unusual but plain in shape, in ref to the spelling. I want a Z letter necklace because of the weird placement in the middle of my name. Z is that weird letter.

But I love it because it's a variation of my mom's name and I like the flower of it's meaning. Theres some story to it; I forget how it goes. Overall,love it but the spelling is not cute in MO. It also relaxes white people over the phone when they hear it. It's always someone's sister's name.

But I love when I'm talking to a guy and they find it out and they're like hey! Like that song!

I'm always like it's a good song.

I met Efrain for the first time maybe a month or two ago and we were in the group chat and I said something and he was like HEY! Weezer! Suzanne! I was like omg lol

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That's a non annoying good question what would fuck up your life?

:Cher voice/clap: project

[bouquet-luminary]

:Twin one looks at Twin two beady eyed:

:Twin two looks at Twin one beady eyed:

No

No?

NO

:Big eyes: I KNOW

You think?

I hope not

me too

:beady eyes: