Book: Cryptozoologicon (2013)
"Based on the extremely reliable and undoubtedly authentic accounts reported by Fawcett and others, we propose the existence of a veritable super-anaconda that we dub Stupendaconda portentificus, or the Stupendaconda. Its existence safely puts to rest the idea that gigantic size can only evolve in snakes when global temperatures are at an all-time high. What does a snake this large eat? Whatever it wants. Stupendaconda evolved alongside diverse large rodents, crocodyliforms, turtles and snakes, all of which it preyed upon in the past. A substantial decline in the diversity of these animals during the Holocene has resulted in Stupendaconda becoming rarer than it ever was, and it was never an abundant animal to begin with.
One of the most mysterious things about giant anacondas is that juvenile specimens have never been discovered or reported, despite the fact that this is the only time in their lives when they might easily be killed, captured and retained for study. Why is this? The reason is remarkable and preposterous, and challenges much of what we know about snake biology.
As is well known, adult Stupendacondas are gigantic beasts, 20m long or more. Rather than giving birth to umpteen live babies (as is normal for the other, smaller anaconda species), females grow one gigantic, hyper-developed mega-baby, the birth length of which is about 7m. That is, larger than virtually all large specimens of the largest known non-Stupendaconda large snakes. As predicted for an animal that puts so much investment into the growth of its baby, there is a strong maternal bond between the mother and juvenile and they stay in close contact for decades. This explains why Fawcett and other explorers often found several super-snakes in close proximity. Unfortunately, this reproductive strategy makes these snakes slow to replace themselves and prone to extinction. Today, they may be teetering on the brink. It may already be too late. Indeed, Fawcett himself may have single-handedly contributed to the downfall of one of the world's most incredible serpents."
- from Cryptozoologicon (2013)
