#snek rants

[blaisezabinj]

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[blaisezabinj]

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[blaisezabinj]

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[blaisezabinj]

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[snekkysnoot]

There's nothing like sitting at home thinking of all the things you could be doing right now as a 27 year old woman and quickly realizing how much your life is a shit show as your grandmother keeps trying to run out the door with no pants on and spits on the floor that you just mopped. But I guess it could be worse, since my own aunt tried to get me arrested a week ago. There's one silver lining.

[snekkysnoot]

I guess while I’m still rattled and ranty might as well just go off about shit that still bugs me.

I’m just. I cannot believe my aunt when she gave us shit for not paying for my grandma’s bingo trips. Granted, I don’t agree with the fact that my mom is holding onto all of my grandma’s SS payments but y’know, we’re handling the bills and the food and diaper costs, + clothes and whatever else she needs. And my aunts literally only need to handle the costs when they decide to take their mother out whenever they have free time and are emotionally ready to handle her. And yet, its on me to have the money on hand whenever tf my eldest aunt suddenly decides that she wants to take her to bingo, whether its when she texts me in the morning or texts me an hour before she plans to show up. And then aunt #2 gets involved when we stop paying, giving me and my mom shit, saying “there’s 3 adults in the house, you don’t need to be holding onto the money when you live there RENT FREE”. 

Rent free. That argument may have been valid 14 years ago when my grandma was independent. That isn’t the case anymore. We used to leave her by herself, we used to have movie day on saturday mornings. And that stopped when she kept calling these same aunts on the phone, paranoid and scared about being alone, and their response was to call me to rush home and make her stop. Now she needs 24/7 supervision. So somebody needs to be here at all times. Sure we can switch off, sure it would make more sense to do it in shifts, but unfortunately my parents seem to be some weird package deal and that just leaves single lonely college-failout me to do the job. Well, I was doing half the work before I failed out of university, but nobody gives a shit about that. So no, only two able bodied adults can make money at a time, and nobody here has a degree so the jobs are not high paying. So often my parents have second jobs, which is only possible because one person (me) is always here to keep an eye on her.

 And watching her is not easy work either. I spend everyday making her meals, giving her meds, I used to get her ready for daycare, and I handle her health visits. AND I have to make her bathe because she doesn’t do it on her own anymore, and I have to wash her clothes and clean up after her every time she has a bathroom accident, which is every day now. Even though she wears adult diapers. I’m doing the work of a CNA but I wasn’t getting paid like one, and now I’m not gonna be paid at all. Oh but y’know, we’re living such a cushy life just because we’re living here “rent free”.

All of my cousins are going to college or living their own lives with their own jobs and their own cars, and my aunts act like I’m still here because I’m just mooching off of all of my grandma’s retirement payments. Not because they tasked me with caring for her when she started to decline and now I feel like a shitty person if I walk away, because literally NO ONE will take my place. They didn’t subject any of their kids to this, but its perfectly ok to do to me because I’m Amanda’s daughter, I’m fat and undesirable and I’m not gonna get anywhere in my life just like my mother, so why not make her handle grandma? Mind you, they’re perfectly okay with us living here and taking care of her and handle all of her issues just so long as we get no financial compensation for it. But they need over hundreds of dollars on hand just so they can take her out to dinner or play a pointless night of bingo ONE NIGHT A WEEK. Not even a whole DAY. Meanwhile my ass gets sleep deprived because I have to make sure she doesn’t run out and get hit by a car at 3am, and she’s cursing me and calling me every insult she knows in English while I’m trying to save her fucking life.

Fuck my family, fuck the government for thinking that giving an elderly person with Alzheimer’s $200 extra somehow makes them wealthy enough to pay their own daycare costs, and fuck depression for landing me here in the first fucking place.

[snekkysnoot]

when your teacher shits on your bibliography because of a source tHAT SHE SUGGESTED

its only -2 points but still

[snekkysnoot]

*still isn’t done being angry about the SU fandom*

But seriously, did everybody forget about the cluster? The big pile of shattered gems that’s used to destroy planets? The one that Steven empathized with and in doing so helped bubble it and saved the world? Steven felt their pain and longing from trying to reform themselves and passed out from the intensity of it. How could a fourteen year old boy who is so pure in almost every way be expected to just accept this new weapon and feel totally ok about doing that to even more gems just because they’re his ‘enemy’? Rose could probably feel shattered gems too, that’s likely why she viewed Bismuth’s solution as horrific and nothing like what she wanted the Crystal Gems to be. The war was about protecting Earth and also teaching the Homeworld gems that your destiny doesn’t have to be predetermined, killing gems would not prove her point.

Another thing, nobody saw the diamonds’ corruption coming, no one knew that they were capable of that level of savagery until it happened. And as we all saw, Bismuth was bubbled before the battle that led to the corruption. So not only did Bismuth’s idea seem brutal, it also seemed excessive at the time. Rose couldn’t foresee that Bismuth could have likely saved a bunch of lives by killing a path through the enemy line and taking on a diamond, but even if she had succeeded with that plan nothing compares to what the corruption had done. Bismuth had invented the gem equivalent of a gun, while the Diamonds dropped the gem equivalent of a nuke. Bismuth would have needlessly killed a bunch of gems that were about to die or become deformed anyway.

And seriously, we’re going to accuse Steven Universe of being racist? The show that casts primarily poc voice actors? With a fairly diverse cast of human characters with various family types, including interracial couples? Finally a show where a mixed race kid like me feels represented for once, not only with Steven being half human half gem, but just look at Connie. And you’re gonna get bent out of shape over the characters that aren’t even supposed to represent or resemble any race??? For people who want to stop racism there seems to be a lot of energy spent on pointing out vaguely race related things. And by vaguely I mean you’re really reaching here. When I saw Bismuth I didn’t see a ‘black-coded’ character, I saw a character that pretty accurately represents the colors of her gem. Because she’s not human, she’s an alien. You people need to stop attaching meaning to every single little thing. So if Garnet is black, Pearl is white, Amethyst latina, what the hell are the rest? Is one of them Asian? Or wait, they can’t be can they? None of their eyes are slanty enough, right? Squawk all day about your own race getting the shaft but have noooo problem putting down another one, right?

I don’t even know why I let this get to me, this is the beginning of Trump’s America after all. More and more of this stupidity is gonna keep cropping up, its why the asshole is so popular. Honestly if this is the kinda shit that gets discussed about a CHILDREN’S SHOW I’m honestly hoping this country goes down the shitter so we can start over from scratch. Fuck this shit.