#snekshit

[lordsnek]

We taught this chimpanzee to understand autoerotic asphyxiation and he hanged himself

[lordsnek]

pov - your body is sinking into the captured stone bowl . not so good for you , but for us it will be delicious

[lordsnek]

Do you think tetris jesus died on the t piece

[lordsnek]

I hope people here see my vision

[lordsnek]

Shoutout to stickbugs fr if you have a spider in your house and you try to extricate it it'll be a nuisance and crawl everywhere, small bugs will just fly around like crazy so no room is safe, and those big spindly things with the glowing red eyes and fractal-like wings are just unnerving. I once had a stickbug in my house and it just sat there and I tried to catch it in a cup and it was like hmmm no? And then I tried again and it was like ugh fine and I put it outside and now we're all so happy and I hope that stickbug lead a great life and sired a family of equally happy aesthetically pleasing sticklike creatures

[lordsnek]

Hey so I was going to apologize for what I said last night but I went to Mad At Me island and nobody there had even heard of you

[lordsnek]

So, there's a man crawling through the desert.

He'd decided to try his SUV in a little bit of cross-country travel, had great fun zooming over the badlands and through the sand, got lost, died, and he and another car crashed into somebody from either side. If that was you, would you drink windshield wiper fluid to survive?

[lordsnek]

When bro pranks me by using length contraction to make my penis appear .6 times its regular size but I lowkey have a length contraction fetish so I get .67 times longer and he genuinely doesn't realize he's missing the birth of his son due to time dilation