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I.L.Y. //mark tuan.

Mark Tuan x Reader

word count: ~3.5k not edited.

warnings: fluff. soft smut? language. we love a twist ending.

title inspo from i.l.y. by the rose

+ + +

“Come overrr, you should’ve been here by now,” you smiled at the words sprawled across the screen of your phone. You felt your heart flutter as you sat up in your bed. Truth be told, you were already out of your clothes and ready to call it a night but whenever Mark messaged you, you sprung to your feet.

You couldn’t help it. The two of you had been the closest of friends for two years now. Occasionally, the two of you went out together, more recently referring to the outings as dates and enjoying the benefits of being in a relationship without actually being in a relationship. The two of you had talked about sealing the deal and taking the next step a couple times, but you were never ready until recently. You were beginning to feel yourself open up to the idea of a new relationship. Your last relationship ended on a very messy note and you swore to yourself that you’d stay out of one for awhile, but at this point, it’s only been two months since you made that promise to yourself.

“I didn’t know I was invited,” your fingers danced swiftly from key to key before pressing send. “I’ll be there in ten.”

Swinging yourself out of bed, you reached for a pair of leggings and an over sized sweater, which was very out of season but comfort was your top priority. Stepping out of your room and into the bathroom, you touched up your hair attempting to put it in a neat but still messy ponytail. You wiped away any black residue that was left behind on your face from you nightly skin care routine and stepped back out of the bathroom, turning off the light behind you.

Upon entering your car, the notification for maps popped up telling you exactly how long it would take to get to Mark’s apartment. That always made you smile. Even though he never said anything directly, you knew that your phone’s reminder that you received every time you got in your car at night, showed that, to some extent, Mark valued your time together and made seeing you a priority.

You were always thankful for the short drive. Your ex lived approximately twenty minutes away from you before moving three hours away from you then they moved themselves to the other side of the country, very far away from you. Your car ride was only two songs long now. Pulling your car to the front of the apartment owners’ house, you turned the car off and made your usual walk up the driveway after making sure multiple times that your car was locked, since the neighborhood he lived in wasn’t the best.

The homeowners had built three apartments off the side of their house. They were all one bedroom, fairly small, but more than enough for one person to live comfortably. Mark’s was the last apartment in the very back. You knocked your usual five times then turned and waited for the door to be opened just enough to see one of Mark’s eyes. You used that time to look around at the sky or at the ground or whatever he had sitting outside his door.

After a short time, you heard the door open, saw his eyes look at you, and heard his voice question, “What do you want?”

You smiled brightly, “Good evening there sir, I was wondering if you had a moment to talk about our Lord and Savior, the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Could I come in?”

Mark proceeded to fully open the door as a fit of laughter spread across his face. “Hi there, princess,” he opened his arms to you and you gladly stepped into them.

As per your usual routine, he wrapped you in one arm, using his other arm to close the door behind you as he smoothly wrapped that arm around your shoulders. The two of you met each others eyes before greeting each other with a couple of kisses. You pulled away and smiled as you nuzzled up to his chest.

“How is you? You’re so small and short and cute, how is that even fair?” He began to sway back and forth.

“What do you mean how is that fair?” you laughed.

“To all the other girls,” he stopped and looked down at you. “You’re the most gorgeous girl I’ve ever seen and you could easily pull any guy you wanted to. That’s just not fair.”

You giggled. “Not even close.”

“You know I’m right, don’t even deny it,” he kissed the top of your head and walked the two of you over to the couch, subsequently causing you both to fall onto it.

Once you were able to calm your laughing, you gazed up at his eyes that were now over yours. “I’m doing good, by the way.”

“Ah, right. I asked how you were doing,” Mark smiled as he adjusted his body so he was now laying behind you, his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you as close as humanly possible. “I’m glad to hear you’re doing good.”

“And how are you doing, Mr. Tuan?”

“I’m doing alright,” he sighed. “I had a busy day today, got back from my parents not too long ago and had dinner with them.”

“How was that?”

“It was good, it always is. Except for when my dad makes things uncomfortable, but tonight was good. He didn’t say or do anything bad.”

A small chuckle escaped your lips. In the two years the two of you had been close for, you had come to learn a lot about his family dynamic. Mark always talks about how much he appreciates his mother and how he’d do anything for her. He also talked about his dad and how he always had good intentions, but they came off wrong about sixty percent of the time. Their relationship was always a bit rocky but he still did his best to spend time with his dad.

“That’s good,” you smiled. “I’m glad,” your voice was at a whisper and you closed your eyes, enjoying Mark’s embrace.

You turned your body so the two of you were facing each other. Pressing your foreheads together, the two of you laid there quietly for a couple seconds, stealing every moment you could of the intimate space that was created. Mark ran his hand up and down your back. Your fingers were tangled in his hair as you played with the ends of each piece you grabbed. As you continued, you sat up just enough to see over him. You could feel his eyes watching every micro movement you made. He clicked his tongue softly a few times, calling you down to meet him in a kiss.

Without a second thought, you lowered yourself back down to him and met him in a gentle kiss, that gradually grew into something more rough. He guided your body up as he moved himself under you. You groaned but complied; the couch wasn’t wide enough for you to sit on top of him comfortably.

“I know,” he said, placing his hands on your hips. “But you know we always have to start on the couch.”

You placed your hands over his as the two of you adjusted so you were placed perfectly over his hard on. He slowly started rocking your hips, guiding you before wrapping his hands around and firmly grabbing your ass. You lowered yourself down to him and taking his bottom lip between your teeth. His hand slipped as his tried to spank you.

“Princess,” he groaned. “You know the rules.”

You brought your hand through his hair, trailing your fingertips down to his chest. “What are those?” You hummed, not breaking eye contact with him.

“These, fantastic leggings,” he ran the tips of his fingers along the waistband, “need to come off.”

“But what if I want to keep them on?” Your eyes landed on his lips.

His hand met your ass again firmly causing a small moan to leave your lips. “It’s more fun with them off, you know these things.” He kept his voice low.

Without hesitation, you lips met his again. You began trailing kisses down to his jawline, sprinkling it softly with your lips, then down his neck to his collar bone before you pulled his skin between your teeth, harshly biting and sucking the skin in short increments. You paused to run your tongue over the newly pink area before repeating.

“Fuck,” he groaned, taking control of your hips again as he began to rub himself against you faster. You tried your best to fight the moans threatening to escape. “Baby girl, I need you to take these off,” he continued.

You rolled your head around starting from your right shoulder, as if you were trying to pop it, before you looked dead in his eyes. His movements stopped and your hands caressed his hair again. You kissed his forehead before rising from the couch. You kept your back towards him per his usual request but you stole a couple of glances over your shoulder as you slowly pulled the leggings down and off your ankles. You enjoyed seeing his reaction. He sat up in the corner of the couch, his eyes scanning your figure before fixating on the show, his lip between his teeth.

“You’re so sexy,” he fidgeted in his seat, still skimming your body in awe as you turned to face him.

“Oh yeah?” You smiled. “Sexy, how? What makes me sexy?” You approached him on the couch, straddling him.

“You,” he pulled you as close as he could to himself again. He hovered his lips around your neck, his hands trailing up your shirt then back down to your butt.

You rolled your head to the side giving him more access to your sweet spot. He didn’t hesitate and harshly bit your neck, tightening his grip on you, causing your to sharply inhale and moan. You slowly began to rock your hips again.

“God, you’re so wet,” he hummed into your neck.

Suddenly, his grip on you changed. He snaked one arm around your bottom and the other up your sweater, to keep you close and from falling as he rose from the couch and carried you into his room.

Upon placing you onto his bed, he grabbed the hem of your sweater and pulled it over your head, leaving you in your bra and panties. As you got comfortable on the bed, he pulled his shirt and shorts off, then slid his way on to the bed on top of you. He settled himself between your legs and raised one of them over his shoulder. “Tell me when your close,” he reminded you.

You let out a small laugh and nodded as he continued again. This was a usual thing the two of you did. The two of you rarely engaged in intercourse. Mostly because you weren’t on the pill and had no intentions to go back on it. He enjoyed watching you climax but it seemed as if he enjoyed teasing you more, getting you close enough to the edge before stopping completely. You eventually began to not tell him but he quickly picked up on your cues and learned to stop when your body moved in certain ways.

His favorite thing to do was to quiz you while doing it. This time, asking you for the capitals of twenty states in America. If you were coherent enough to answer, he knew he needed to do more. Eventually, you turned the question back on him, distracting the both of you from your activities until you had no interest in being on top of him anymore.

You swung your legs to the side and turned to face him from the reverse position you were in. “We suck at this,” he laughed. “We need to go back to fifth grade or something.” He got up out of his bed and walked back out to his living room area.

“I go to school every day, it’s my job,” you shouted at him.

“Well then, they need to find a better person for your job,” he replied in a snarky tone. “What do you think of my new look?” He waltzed back into the room wearing your leggings.

“Oo, yes,” you complimented. “Those hug your legs perfectly.”

“You don’t think it shows off my chiseled thighs too much do you? They don’t make my calves look big? I don’t want to show too much off to people. I need them to think they look better than me before I pull out these.”

You laughed, “Give me pants back.”

“Say no more,” he immediately pulled them down. “My ass looked great in them but they look much better on you.”

“That’s why I got them,” you stepped onto the tile floor and pulled them back on yourself, grabbing your sweater before you stood up fully again.

“Come on,” he grabbed your shoulders. “You left your chocolate covered pretzels here the other day. Let’s eat them and sit on the couch and watch cheesy sitcoms.”

“Okay,” you smiled as he turned you around and led you out the room.

You sat in the corner of the couch where the two of you always curled up together in hopes of him finding his way to you. Instead, after grabbing the pretzels from the freezer, he sat in the opposite corner and handed you the unopened bag. You thanked him and turned your attention to the TV.

“He’s going to return home and find out she’s been with his brother, isn’t he?” You looked over at him, commenting on the show.

He nodded in agreement, “Yeah, probably.”

“Would you ever do something like that?”

“Yeah, why do you think you haven’t heard from your ex?”

You scoffed at his joke, “You don’t even know my ex.”

“That’s what you think, we’ve had a secret love affair this whole time. Why do you think I’ve been busy lately?”

“Because you’re moving in two months, registering for school, spending time with family and other friends, working. I mean, the list goes on.”

“That’s what we want you to believe.”

“Shut up,” you laughed, throwing the nearest pillow to you at him.

You kept your eyes on him, watching his reaction. The two of you had been sat on the couch for fifteen minutes now and Mark remained in his corner. You had tried cuddle up to him earlier but he didn’t meet you in it. His arm that usually would’ve fallen around you stayed up on the couch cushion, so you sat back up. His eyes were falling heavy and his chin was dropping to his chest.

“What?” he asked breaking the silence between the two of you.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just tired.”

“Are you sure that’s it?” You asked hesitantly.

“Yeah,” he sighed.

You tilted your head in an attempt to get a better look of his face.

“What? What do you want?” He asked again, rubbing his eye.

“What’s on your mind?” Your brows pinched together.

“Nothing, I’m just tired.”

You sat there for a moment looking at him. You were turning thoughts in your head, debating whether or not to push further. You couldn’t find it in yourself to just skim over this. You knew he was thinking about something.

“Mark,” you finally spoke up. “What’s on your mind? I can tell there’s something brewing in there.”

He smoothed his hair down, running his hand down his face. “It’s that obvious, huh?” You gave him a half smile, not daring to look away from him. Noticing this out of the corner of his eye, he sighed. “I don’t think we should do this anymore. I mean, the physical things. I don’t have the same feelings for you that I used to.”

Just like that, you felt your face go pale. You looked down at your hands folded in your lap, now refusing to look up at Mark. A wave of emotions flooded over you as you felt your whole body begin to go numb. You stayed silent. Eventually, you stole a glance at him. You could feel his eyes piercing through you. You could hear his voice too. Time seemed to speed up as thirty minutes passed by seemingly in a blink of an eye. But it also seemed to be moving in slow motion as an empty feeling filled your chest.

After asking you to speak up twice, Mark finally suggested that you go home and without hesitation, you stood up from the couch, collected your things, and headed out the door, leaving him behind. Mark walked out behind you but you were ready to leave without him catching up to you.

Although to him, the silence was a waste of time, you struggled to determine whether or not you should tell him how you felt about him, which was very much the opposite of the feelings he just expressed, or lack there of, rather. Upon approaching your car, you froze at the door, knowing Mark always opened your door for you.

“Don’t you dare touch that door handle,” he called after you.

Once he caught up to you and opened the door, he wrapped his arms around your shoulders, giving you a hug.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, his hands dropping to your arms.

You looked up at him, making eye contact with him. You made no attempt to hide just how hurt you were. You loved him. You were ready to jump into the next chapter with him by your side. To hear his words left you completely shattered and it was very clearly written on your face.

“I need to get to sleep, Y/n.”

You slowly sat in you car, Mark’s hand guiding you in. Just as he was about to walk away, you grabbed his hand.

“Y/n,” he bowed down to look at you. “I can’t stay out here with you. I need to go to bed and if you’re not going to say anything, you need to let me go.”

“I’m going to say something,” you whispered without much thought.

“Then speak up. I don’t like sitting in silence.”

You took a couple of deep breaths and closed your eyes. “I don’t want you to take this the wrong way or think about it too much,” you started softly, remembering what happened last time you said this to someone. “I care about you so much. I want to see you continue to grow and do what’s best for you. I want nothing but the absolute best for you. On top of all of that, I really like you, way more than I thought I ever would,” you paused. “I don’t know how else to put these emotions into one word other than,” you turned to face him a bit more as he was now standing up straight, looking down at you. “Love,” you hesitated. “I- I love you, Mark.”

His thumb brushed over your hand. “Then I need you to understand this is what’s best for me,” he stepped away from the car and let go of your hand. “With everything that’s going on, with me moving, and everything that’s happened between us in the past,” he shook his head. “The feelings aren’t there anymore, and I don’t want anything long distance.”

You hung your head again, this time, tears threatening to come out.

“I need to go inside,” he placed his hand on the car door and you readjusted yourself back into the car. “Goodnight, Y/n.”

Just like that, the door was closed and he was walking away. Just like that, you were left alone in your car. You raised your to wipe away the tears that began flooding out. You sat in your car, crying hysterically, unable to stop. You couldn’t believe you let Mark under your skin, just to be let down and broken. You began to resent every moment minute of time you spent with him in the past six months. Remembering every argument and every word that left his mouth as he fought for you to choose him months ago when you weren’t ready to, it all ended being a waste of time. Your feelings didn’t mean a thing to him anymore.

His words from three months prior ran through your head as you drove home; “You know just as well as I do that we’re the only two people on this earth for each other. We were made for each other.”

You clawed at your chest as if you were trying to hold your heart to keep it together as reality set in that you were losing your best friend.